The Positivity Thread

@billie48 Yes, I am learning a lot from your successes, also think I am getting the hang of how to quote.
Billie 48 I noticed you are from Canada. Have you heard o f the Montreal Tinnitus Clinic?

 

No, I am from the west coast of Canada. There wasn't any true tinnitus clinic of sort back when I got T but there are now some certified therapists here now.

 

I just read your post and this is so uplifting - thanks for sharing. I hope many on the forum will read it as well as other posts on the Positivity thread and become optimistic about their current and future situations. People need to realize that habituation is possible and as you have demonstrated ... with both patience and a positive attitude this can be achieved.

Sending along my best wishes.

 

I had a bit of a rough day yesterday and again this morning and i noticed what was wrong. My mind started the catastrophe thinking again, worrying about the future and so on, so i have realized that i really have to live day by day and not give even tomorrow a thought, just live in the moment and make the best of that moment....

I found this article which is very helpful to me: http://www.calmandcourageous.com/live-day-by-day/

Hope it can help others I for one am starting to feel a bit better again. Living with tinnitus is harsh ,but living with T combined with worrying about the future is overwhelming, so take it one day at a time, and make the most of it.

 

@TheDanishGirl I really needed to read this article - thanks for posting it! I am the queen of catastrophic thinking, and it's funny to think that something so simple as take it one day at a time is the cure. All any of us really have is the present moment - so hard to keep remembering that though lol!

I'm also so glad you're feeling better and also that you noticed the connection to what was wrong. That's huge! xoxo RM

 

I have moderate tinnitus from sleep meds that I took about five and a half months ago and moderate high frequency hearing loss. Very occasionally I have a quiet day, and I awoke this morning thinking today would be one of those days. But, alas, it just started up again. So I went straight to The Positivity Thread, and I must say I now feel much better. The sun is out, not a given in Seattle, even in summer. And I am ready to attack the day. Thank you everyone!

 

That's good advice and I love the article. My issue is I keep dwelling on the past and freaking out about how much worse my T will get. It was almost gone in March and now I have pressurization issues that react with it now and it's loud. Things make it worse that didn't before March, such as showers and the slightest changes in elevation (so car rides).

The other day we went to visit my sister, nephew, and niece. It's a lot of huge elevation changes. Things were pleasant but a few blocks from home suddenly my left ear was screaming so loud it drowned out the car and the radio. Almost sent me in a panic attack. It felt like forever, but it quit. When I got into the house I realized that a mild version of the noise followed me in. Thankfully sleep reset it and things went back to "normal".

I keep realizing how much I'm dwelling on the past. Not living for the day. I had some really great days and even though the T was more intense I kept having a good day. I realized it was because I wasn't dwelling on how stable, quiet, and un-scary my T used to be.

I need to realize that I am healing even if it's not as fast as I'd like. I can't fear things that make it "worse" because even if I avoid them things do what they will anyway. Live for the day and not keep worrying on whether it's getting better or worse.

 

I hear ya Shera!

I am the biggest worry head ever....right where i am now with my T, thinking about the future, even the near one results in NO GOOD for me, i end up with catastrophe thoughts like: will it get worse, will i go crazy, will i end up in the psych ward again, will my life end in suicide eventually and so on??......not exactly positive thinking. I still have these thoughts and worries about the future, but now that i have become aware that they are bad for me, i can at least try to stop them by keeping busy and focus on the moment at hand......not saying it is easy, but i am trying the best i can and so can you.

And btw i really like your statement: "I can't fear things that make it "worse" because even if I avoid them things do what they will anyway"......you are right, if it gets worse it gets worse, worrying about it now wont change that, it will only make the current moment less enjoyable, the best we can do is live life, protect our hearing with ear plugs and be a bit more cautious and the just hope for the best.

 

Exactly. And when I think about "if it gets worse" I immediately try to think of the plus side of that. That "it can get better" too.

It helps to do things you know you normally enjoy even if you don't feel like it. Because now I'm actually starting to enjoy things again.

 

Markku and Steve have done so much for the tinnitus community and I thank them. So often people don't understand this is far more than having a support board forum. I keep reading about their successes and accomplishments to date.

I hope people reading what the "person" spreading negativity on other sites about Markku and Steve and their work understand that the positive is far greater than what is seen. For some reason negative posts are like neon lights at night. While the many positive posts go more quiet.

People need to be able to write their minds without judgement. Yes, this may seem overwhelming for others reading posts but those people need to focus on the positive.

Looking at the support site forum I don't see that many negative posts. Just questions and answers for many different tinnitus related stuff.

Now back when I got tinnitus there was no way I could be "positive" from the start. And yeah back then there were a few support boards that were always at war with each other which did not help me as a new sufferer. And it was easy back then to be drawn into the drama.

Back then, around 2003 or so, if one chose one board over another all hell broke out. A person would recruit new posters and send weird and guilt ridden pms for being on the "other" board. It was crazy.

Steve and Markku deserve so much respect for going through so many serious problems and still keeping this awareness alive. So easy to say "F" it and walk away. And that is what many of us tinnitus "veterans" did.

We don't need that type of drama. Don't get pulled into to it either. Listen to your inner gut feelings and follow your instincts. Remember many "success" people may not be posting but we are still around.

I need a spell check thing.... or am I missing where it is?

Be well....

 

Well I had some really great days and even got lost in a book.

Then it went south. I think my period (I know TMI) and catching a bug at the same time spiraled me out. I didn't even know I was sick until someone pointed it out. I also realize that I am addicted to listening for and trying to see if my T has gotten worse. I realized I was putting thoughts towards praying and telling my body to heal from it constantly. So my multi tasking brain is listening to it even while I read or watch a movie.

I think being in the quiet all day may not be that great of an idea. I felt like the music/radio is a crutch, but I feel calmer when I can't focus on it.

I'm glad that I realized my decent and caught myself. Good news is I am sleeping better and better despite it all. Even when I had night sweats from being sick. I need to refocus my thoughts.

 

Having a better time. Trying the Back to Silence approach. I'm still focusing on it a lot, but I do find my emotions are changing.

Also, not quite so restless. My thyroid and adrenals were out. I actually soaked in the tub, with music, for almost an hour. So that's progress. (So far the longest I've been able to stay in one place has been watching TV lately and then for maybe 30 min. ) Even took on the long job of cleaning the bathroom.

It also feels less loud more often. That's something.

I also felt positive enough to dress up like I use to. Trendy outfit and makeup. Even lipstick!

 

Keeping Positive:

This isn't a success story yet. This is mostly things people have said before on this forum.
I need to specify that I've only had ringing for a week and a half, and even though I can hear it over most things if I listen for it; it's not blaringly loud, I don't have hearing loss in the normal range. My heart goes out to all of those less fortunate, whom have it loud, and/or for a long time. This is to all those who have it new, to whom it is unsettling and scary.

Mine was possibly caused by anxiety, though I don't believe I was - perhaps generally stressed for the past months. The first week was hard. No appetite. No sex drive. No motivation. Weak from not eating. Anxious/nervous/slightly depressed but not so much that I was crippled. I could still do things not food or sex related without forcing myself to move. I found myself wanting to go to sleep early, and found that I could fall asleep easily enough - however, I found that if I awoke early it was harder to fall back into it, especially ~the hour before my alarm goes off. I looked for reasons and excuses to leave work to nap in my car. My mood read like a Las Vegas billboard to my wife, whom while concerned for me, had little sympathy for my condition given her almost daily migraines since she was a teenager. GP and ENT basically gave me a clean bill of health, with the standard story of "You'll adjust". It always reminds me of a line from Men in Black:

If my first week continued as it had for much longer, I believed my mental health, my work performance, and my marriage were all going to have a hard time. It was imperative that I found a way to cope with this soon. I did the normal routine, scouring the internet for ways to cure it. The back-of-the-head finger knocking, audio therapy, etc. Every dead end upped my anxiety and stress. The hardest part is accepting you do not have control over the sound, you do have control over your reaction.

The first piece of advice most people get is to relax, as stress exacerbates the sounds. You might find it hard to relax; worry not, this is normal. You might find, as I did, that things that you used to enjoy do not interest you. Don't force yourself to do something that will stress you out, even things you think should be fun. I had to stop playing video games, because while I consider them fun, there is certainly a level of stress involved that I needed to step back from for a while. I found that watching TVs and movies, while a distraction, I still found that I was checking my sound every so often, and the very nature of most tv and film can be stressful. The best way I found to relax early on, even for a moment, was with audio masking.

If you have Amazon Prime, Amazon Music has a Work, Study, Relax station that has a good mix of relaxation, yoga, and nature sounds.
mynoise.net is great for masking, as you can manually adjust the different levels for every piece of audio they have until it masks your sound as you need. It's also free for the great bulk of content they offer. It even has cat purring.

If you can relax, even for a few minutes, it will improve your day. If your day can improve, then...

@I who love music 's Back to Slience Thread was a huge motivating exercise. Refocusing from the sound itself to your emotions was a good stepping stone for me. I am grateful.

There is one youtube video I found that honestly improved my outlook. It's by Dr. Bruce Hubbard, who I noticed has a spot in the Doctors Corner thread. It deals with CBT, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, for treating not Tinnitus, but the Distress that tinnitus can cause some people. I do not know if the statistics he lists are accurate, but the whole video supplied me with a level of hope and optimism that I can't begin to relate to you.I have had to watch this in its entirety a few times, but it helped. It rationalized the reasons I was feeling the way I was, and helped me realize that I can overcome this, and it provided some basic exercises you can do to retrain the way your mind reacts to the sound.

Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) for Tinnitus...

I came home yesterday and attempted what I think is Mindful Meditation. I put some masking music on, turned down the lights, sat on the floor in a stereotypical meditation pose, and focused to the best of my ability on my breathing and my breathing alone. I would expand my circle of awareness, tension in my shoulders, pressure on my legs against the floor, the cat knocking a glass off a table like the jerk he is. The sound would come - and I would let it, I would not fight it, but I would refocus on my breathing again from the start. If my mind drifted to thoughts of work, or anything unrelated I would start over again focusing on the sound of my breathing and expand outwards. I made the mistake of trying to set a timer for 10 minutes, but I just kept checking to see how much time I had left. I turned the timer off, and just did this exercise for as long as I wanted. It felt similar to the relaxation exercises at the end of a yoga class. I definitely felt better afterwards. I will try to do this every so often.

I'm not interested in researching supplements, though I started taking a generic multivitamin since my appetite was low, not because I think it will help with the sound.

I'm not 100% yet. My appetite is returning, my libido has improved from zero to low, my energy is returning, and I'm about to go give blood - something I did not think I would be excited or eager to do just a few days ago.

Don't give up. I was a nervous, anxious wreck as little has 3 days ago, and some simple exercises have made the world of difference. If I can improve, I can overcome this. If I can overcome this, YOU can overcome this.

 

@JimJimJalabim I'm glad to see you're doing better. Great advice for those starting out with it.

 

Had tinnitus for a little over a year but it's gone now.

 

I'm so happy to hear that! Congratulations.

 

Congrats! How loud was it and how'd you get it?

 

Very happy for you!

 

My tinnitus is more intense than it ever has been before, due to ototoxicity. I am really learning to adapt to the permanent spike by accepting it and helping my self by not drinking and smoking bud. It also helps a lot to not eat super salty and fatty foods. I had tinnitus all my life, but I never had to be this diligent about it before ototoxicity. The positive thought is that I am giving up my two favorite vices "being crunk"

 

Been for 6 weeks away on a prolonged vacation and T got seriously, seriously down. I found myself not even noticing it, thinking about it, or nothing for nearly a week at some point. With regular sleep, lots of fun and travelling it nearly all disappeared.

On last day I got cold and now its back again, jumping up from point where I considered it one step from being away. Well, bummer I guess, but been there just week back, will be at that point again. Just this damn cold needs to finally go away.

 

So I've been trying to stay busy and not give in to my T. It's been working. I can definitely fall asleep immediately and if I wake up I can fall asleep faster. Meaning I don't wake up long enough to curse my T. (Only my cat is currently messing with my sleep. She's yowling for food all the time or sleeping on top of me.) Some days the nose feels devastating and others not so much. It hurt a bit after an ER visit for my mom my thoughts went to the normal, "After this you get to go home and relax in the quiet." Sadly that option is kind of gone. So when I got home and settled her in I just went straight to bed for the quiet of sleep.

On the plus side I went for a drive all over Yellowstone and decided to not worry about all the elevation changes messing with my T. And I read a book in 2 days!! Yeah! The world didn't quite melt away like it used to when I'm consumed by a book, but it got close.

I plan to try and catch up on Game of Thrones and pick up an anime.

 

Are you still taking hibiscus tea or masking your sounds ?

 

@Shera

 

@khushbu I haven't had to take the tea all month long. I know if I can't fall asleep I can brew some. . I do still make sure that my diet has foods that are rich in melatonin and serotonin. I even went to bed early last night and stayed asleep. (Not ready to try napping yet.) No. I don't mask period

If it gets annoying I do listen to music when I do dishes or something. Mine is loud enough I can hear it in the idling car. So to mask with sound or other things means it has to be fairly loud. So I listen to everything on low. (Besides I live with my parents as I'm taking care of them and I don't want to intrude. Plus, I have to listen for emergencies.) When I'm outside I don't like to mask either because I need to listen to predators for my chickens. (Or if I help my neighbor out listening for when the cows are calving.) We live in the real country so it's pretty quiet out here.

I'm getting to a point where I'm just more annoyed and tired of hearing my T. It flares up in down in volume and sounds. So some of my more negative emotions are leaving me. Though I do seem to get headaches from it when I react physically to the volume of it.

 

Um... Hyperacusis made me have a different perspective views on sound and music. I appreciate music much better than just before, because you adjust your volumn minimally as to not cause distress and at the same time you have to focus to the music when is not loud enough to hear. You pour everything in what you hear.

 

I'm just over 1 year into my tinnitus journey, and it has lowered itself steadily to about 25% of what it used to be. I can sit in a dead silent room without thinking much of it, and my H has also dropped significally after I started working on improving my tmjd symptoms. For the first time in over a year I can say T and H isn't controling my life anymore.

 

@Adin That's great to hear!

May I ask what things you're doing for you TMJ?

 

I use a Night guard, anti inflamatory medication and stretch a couple times a week. I posted my stretching routine on page 29 in this thread if you want to check it out. Helped me a ton

 

Thanks those are all pretty much the same ones that I do. A few different ones though.

 

@Shera You sound so calm! I'm really proud of you. And you sound like you have such an interesting life - with the cows and being out in the country. I feel the exact same way - I just get annoyed at the T and don't have horrible, sad reactions to it most of the time. I try to just ignore it and get on with my life. Funny about your cat sleeping on you! Sometimes when I want to mask my T, I put my ear on my cat's belly to hear him purring. Hope your mom's okay!
xoxo RM