Tinnitus Safe Travel & Meeting Network — Discussion

Discussion in 'Support' started by Zimichael, Jul 13, 2018.

    1. Zimichael

      Zimichael Member Benefactor

      Location:
      N. California
      Tinnitus Since:
      (1956) > 1980 > 2006 > 2012 > (2015)
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Ac. Trauma & Ac.Trauma + Meds.
      As someone with severe, long term tinnitus and hyperacusis I live a very secluded and isolated life, especially in comparison to my life 'before'. *[See my Profile for details!]. I used to love to travel, do classes, dance, perform, socialize, etc. yet for many years all I have done really is stay at home and get through life day by day. Fortunately I live in a very quiet and beautiful location which is only 10 minutes from town, but feels like it is way out in the country. Overall though, it is an extremely lonely existence.

      When in town I am constantly on "noise alert" and have to use earplugs in stores or wherever there is chance of unpredictable loud sounds, such as traffic, dogs, children, sirens, street music, etc. Thus meeting new people is virtually impossible (and don't even get me started on the thousands of hours I have wasted online trying to do that!) and the only time I get away is a yearly back-packing trip into the deep wilderness where I don't have to worry about encountering noise.

      Yet I still yearn to travel and (now that my last hyperacusis event was 6 years ago) can tolerate long periods with earplugs in if I know I can be in a quiet and safe environment at the end of it, to recover. I can sit in airports, do long distance travel, put up with a bunch of people in buses or trains, etc. with my earplugs, and Bose NC headphones, but after an extended period of time it becomes absolutely exhausting. The critical point is what is waiting for me at the other end. Is it worth it to go through all that and why would I want to?

      The answer is likely to be "yes" under two conditions:

      One ~ If it is a beautiful place, with a quiet location I can use for a base to go out and explore from. Generally that means having to be in the countryside, or in towns where there is nearby and easy access to parks or gardens where I can breathe freely and remove earplugs.

      Two ~ There needs to be a reason to even want to go to such a place far away, and for me that mostly means meeting people, or experiencing something extraordinary (if it is 'sound safe').

      So at core, we come down to two things that are already well founded and huge on the worldwide web – finding places we might want to visit, and people we might want to meet or hang out with.

      The places is done more than adequately by airbnb, though one never really knows if the "quiet place" advertised is indeed quiet in my terms.
      Perhaps the TV on all the time and you can hear it through the walls but the 'owners' think it is not on loud at all?! Or they forgot to mention the dog next door that barks at every shadow but they never seem to even notice?!
      And so on.

      The people is done by meeting/dating sites like Match.com, and countless others. However, they lack terribly in what I would call "truth and reality", and for sure they do not cater to someone saying: "Well I have tinnitus and hyperacusis so I can't actually go to concerts, or movies, or clubs, or whatever".
      The big thing seems to be to advertise oneself as 'fun' and ready for anything. So a handicap that means even a restaurant can be hazardous and anxiety producing (have you eaten with earplugs in?!) does not go down well.
      As people on Tinnitus Talk over the years have mentioned a number of times: "How can I ever meet or date anyone that does not also have tinnitus?" Indeed, it is extremely hard, and I'm guessing that those of you with life-limiting tinnitus and hyperacusis know exactly what I am talking about here.

      Yes, there are 101 things to consider and question. Clearly an extensive 'contact period' would be involved to even try and tell if you wanted to meet person X or Y or if they would drive you crazy in 10 minutes! However, as I have pointed out, this process already happens thousands of times a minute on the web. I would imagine then, that over time we can figure out something that works for us.

      So, this thread is an attempt to have some of that "life" back which more severe forms of tinnitus and/or hyperacusis can rob us of. To meet people who understand what living with these conditions means, and in places that are safe to visit. Speaking for myself, I think it would give me something to do and look forward to. Some hope in the future perhaps, that would help keep depression at bay and give more meaning to this narrow and isolated life I am leading.

      *[As an example to illustrate place, see my post in the "Participants" thread that follows].

      Best ~ Zimichael
       
      • Like Like x 3
    2. glynis
      Feminine

      glynis Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      2004
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Meniere's Disease
      @Zimichael,
      Great idea for members to have a lovely break away from home and meet other members putting each other up.
      love glynis x
       
      • Like Like x 2
    3. Greg Sacramento

      Greg Sacramento Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame Advocate

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2011
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Syringing + Somatic tinnitus from dental work
      @Zimichael You live in a nice area as I have been there several times. Muir Woods is peaceful. Up the road where I live it's all retail and services. I used to like Lake Tahoe, but the attitude would block up my ears. When I lived on the East Coast up to age 30, I loved the small towns with lakes in Massachusetts, New Hampshire and Maine.
       
      • Like Like x 2
    4. jimH
      Caffeine

      jimH Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      30 years+
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic trauma
      Hey Greg,

      Ever been up to my town, North Conway, NH, in the White Mountains?

      1655649_10202491574363395_506928526_o.jpg
       
      • Like Like x 3
      • Friendly Friendly x 1
    5. Greg Sacramento

      Greg Sacramento Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame Advocate

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2011
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Syringing + Somatic tinnitus from dental work
      @jimH Yes, been to Conway. I was just thinking about Conway two nights ago. I tried to remember good times to put myself to sleep. The Kanacamagus Highway is beautiful. Lake Winnipesaukee and area state parks are some of my favorite areas. I lived in Massachusetts near New Hampshire. I went to a school not far from Conway and then transferred to a school in Boston which I hated.
       
      • Like Like x 2
      • Creative Creative x 1
    6. Starthrower
      Wtf

      Starthrower Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      January 2002
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Dental Surgery
      @Greg Sacramento and @Zimichael

      We love Lake Tahoe and travel there quite often. It is a beautiful serene place when you find where to stay. We usually rent a small condo in the woods because the hotels are just too noisy and busy and too much visual stimulation that drives my tinnitus/hpyeracusis crazy. We spend time horseback riding, hiking and golfing a few courses in Carson City and Menden, Nevada. We actually looked at properties there.


      I always ask myself "is it worth it to go through all that and why would I want to?"

      I hope this works out and just give it time to catch on here. Social Networking for severe forms of tinnitus/hyperacusis is a good idea especially for single people. I am married but there is this thread about dating somewhere here and it got rather - off track.
       
      • Like Like x 2
    7. glynis
      Feminine

      glynis Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      2004
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Meniere's Disease
      @Zimichael,
      Maybe add people whom have a caravan, chalet, villa, annex, flat, house etc to rent out cheap to Tinnitus Talk members.
      love glynis

      @Starthrower,
      Great to see your Ambassador badge,
      I suggested it to Markku... well deserved.
      love glynis xxx
       
    8. glynis
      Feminine

      glynis Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      2004
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Meniere's Disease
      Bump!
       
    9. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Zimichael

      Zimichael Member Benefactor

      Location:
      N. California
      Tinnitus Since:
      (1956) > 1980 > 2006 > 2012 > (2015)
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Ac. Trauma & Ac.Trauma + Meds.
      @glynis ...Indeed, this is well within the range of what I was thinking. I did not just mean staying in and with someone in their own living space. Absolutely, more detached options would in many ways be a 'safer' re initial inter-personal aspects. Likewise, places that are 'somewhere else' than where a Participant lives - like second homes, holiday cottages/cabins, etc., etc, as per the list you made Glynis are 100% relevant. As 'rentals' or otherwise.

      Incidentally, I have purposely not mentioned the "money question" in the initial post. It is something that will need to be addressed of course but I would like to leave that aspect completely aside until it is relevant...and relevant will be when we, or if we, have enough Participants to even make it a question!!!

      Best, Zimichael
       
      • Winner Winner x 1
    10. newarrior

      newarrior Member

      Location:
      Bangkok
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/1996
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Concerts
      Man you hit a nerve here for me...

      I live in Bangkok and it seems like I am the only white guy who cannot partake in the whole bar nightlife thing... I am back in the Bay Area, just went to a house party, DJ/dancing/put in the earplugs and danced up a storm for a brief time, then dragged a girl outside... I spent most of the party with earplugs in attached by a leash... I did not give a shit what others thought...

      I also said I cannot deny myself and live in isolation.

      Many things you can do with earplugs.
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    11. Red
      Crappy

      Red Member

      Location:
      Northeast USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise Exposure (Headphones)
      Yeah, but do you have hyperacusis? This is true though for people with hyperacusis.
       
    12. newarrior

      newarrior Member

      Location:
      Bangkok
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/1996
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Concerts
      I have hyperacusis -- since 1996.
       
Loading...

Share This Page