Red
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Paranoid
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Dec 16, 2018 at 1:22 AM
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Location:
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Red

Member, Female, from Northeast USA

Feel like I am about to have a panic attack at work. I can't. I just can't do this. I can't work with the noise. F xmas. Xmas is fing awful Dec 16, 2018 at 12:07 AM

Red was last seen:
Dec 16, 2018 at 1:22 AM
    1. Red
      Red
      Feel like I am about to have a panic attack at work. I can't. I just can't do this. I can't work with the noise. F xmas. Xmas is fing awful
      1. View previous comments...
      2. Red
        Red
        I am a worthless disabled person with loss of dreams, loss of happiness. I'm trying! I really am! I've been trying so hard but it'll never be good enough. I'm too broken
        Dec 16, 2018 at 12:17 AM
      3. Red
        Red
        At least people who kill themselves have the courage to fucking do it. I'm too much of a coward.
        Dec 16, 2018 at 12:19 AM
      4. OnceUponaTime
        OnceUponaTime
        Hey Red. You are not worthless, so please cancel those words and dont ever say them again. Take it one day at a time. I pray God will restore your joy and peace. Is it the Christmas music at work that bothers you or just the t??
        Dec 16, 2018 at 1:37 AM
    2. Red
      Red
      @katri How bad is the pain? Bad enough to prevent sleep? Could be appendicitis if so. Maybe stomach virus or food poisoning.
      1. katri
        katri
        It’s like a huge bloated pain. Probably from energy drinks and no real meals.
        Dec 12, 2018 at 4:44 AM
    3. Red
      Red
      Annnd...the receptionist never put my neurology appointment in and I have to wait until Feb. I am so upset. I was supposed to see him in Oct
      1. Autumnly and Jack Straw like this.
    4. Red
      Red
      Stop bumping really old threads in the support forum. (2yrs+) It's really annoying.
      1. dpdx, TheDanishGirl and Jack Straw like this.
      2. View previous comments...
      3. Red
        Red
        Generally, sounds in speakers are compressed into high frequencies.
        Dec 5, 2018
      4. Layla23
        Layla23
        That’s why I struggle with cellphones still. But I’m okay listening to the tv now. It took a few months but I’m generally okay at a low volume. I can’t go outside though. And car vibrations are a bitch for me still.
        Dec 5, 2018
      5. Red
        Red
        Often other car sounds do bother me though. I think it's also important to have a car with a quiet, smooth engine. I lyft a lot (casual taxi service dunnobif you USA) and notice a big difference in comfort sometimes depending who I ride with.
        Dec 5, 2018
    5. Red
      Red
      It's Giving Tuesday! Finally taking the opportunity to donate. Have you?
      1. 1000 likes this.
      2. View previous comments...
      3. 1000
        1000
        Hyperacusis research
        Nov 28, 2018
      4. Contrast
        Contrast
        hyperacusis research defined as noise pain
        Donate to Mass Eye and Ear and request it be given to hyperacusis.
        Dec 1, 2018
      5. Contrast
    6. Red
      Red
      Tonight's tinnitus imagery: tiny hamster is growing marijuana with my head as a greenhouse. But it won't share any.
      1. Striveon and butterfly75 like this.
      2. PDodge
        PDodge
        I dig it! MJ was a huge help for me- before I got T
        Nov 27, 2018
      3. Phendran
        Phendran
        Quite sad, but hamsters are at least cute.
        Nov 28, 2018
    7. Arseny
      Arseny
      How are you holding up today?
      1. View previous comments...
      2. Arseny
        Arseny
        I feel numb too. I go in circles from crying hysterically to feeling absolutely nothing and just staring into the wall.
        Have you considered LLLT for your H? I'm researching this type of treatment right now. I hope you'll get better soon. I've noticed that I've had symptoms similar to TTTS and they have gradually got better to the point that I feel 90% normal.
        Nov 26, 2018
      3. Red
        Red
        Mostly I just want the ability to watch TV with volume on, listen to music and white noise, and voice chat with people without being in pain. These were my coping methods and now they are gone.

        I am considering LLLT. However, I do not have a lot of money and my hours have been decreased after handing in my ADA form at work. There are no easy decisions in life.
        Nov 26, 2018
      4. Arseny
        Arseny
        I'm very sorry you have to go through this. I'm sorry I don't even have anything to recommend regarding your situation. :(
        I'm considering making my own laser, I'm researching the parts and it seems that I can do it under 100$. I'm running around local clinics and the only one that has 650 nm laser provides treatment for only 4 minutes at 5 mW. It seems to be useless at this dosage.
        Nov 26, 2018
    8. Red
      Red
      New tone. Only thing different was that I used the tragus technique around loud noises. (Not too loud tho, just a H wimp) Never again.
    9. Red
      Red
      I miss my friends.
    10. Red
      Red
      I can, right now, not hear T in my left. The T from the formerly clogged ear. I can only hear the right.
    11. Red
      Red
      My ears have been clogging from fall allergies I think. Unclogged now and T is quieter than before it was clogged. Wonder why?
      1. Jack Straw and Autumnly like this.
    12. Red
      Red
      I have severe depression
      1. katri and Artazanasss like this.
      2. Paulmanlike
        Paulmanlike
        Me too and last year, hang in there. Read about neuromodulation and the research section, very promising results. But first, focus on your depression.
        Nov 13, 2018
        Leoglobe likes this.
    13. Red
      Red
      The worse my hyperacusis, the worse my visual snow is. My vs doesn't seem to be tied to my tinnitus.
      1. Jack Straw and summ like this.
      2. katri
        katri
        Mine is pretty bad. The lights on cars at night are unbearable. How do you drive at night?
        Nov 12, 2018
      3. Contrast
        Contrast
        interesting, see if others have the same issue.
        Nov 12, 2018
    14. Red
      Red
      @katri -You- saved your grades. But I'm sure god was watching you + knew you would succeed. He's surely watching and is proud of ur strength
      1. 1000 and katri like this.
      2. katri
        katri
        That means a lot to me. Especially since you don’t necessarily believe. These days are hard on me and my faith but I can’t let go.
        Nov 10, 2018
        Autumnly, 1000 and Red like this.
    15. Red
      Red
      I'm done with the "don't overprotect" advice. I'm wearing ear protection everywhere that isn't work/home from now on.
      1. Jack Straw likes this.
      2. View previous comments...
      3. Jack Straw
        Jack Straw
        Let your ears rest up as much as possible until the weekend. It's so hard to predict these unexpected events. Hang in there I'm sure it will go down!
        Nov 6, 2018
        Autumnly and Red like this.
      4. katri
        katri
        Wish you the best. Ultimately, it’ll probably work itself out with or without the protection.
        Nov 6, 2018
      5. Gman
        Gman
        I really hate to have to agree with you, but experiences in situations that should have been fine have taught me other wise. I'm protecting more often, but not everywhere (at my own risk).
        Nov 11, 2018
    16. Red
      Red
      Back to the beginning with H, maybe even worse. T sucks but I hate H more. I was doing so good. I had no more ear pain or tension headaches.
      1. Red
        Red
        Just was having some lingering facial pain in response to noise. I didn't even do anything, just was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Car horn at full blast/car alarm at 20-40 ft away.
        Nov 6, 2018
    17. Red
      Red
      I LOVE it when I wake up calm and cautiously optimistic only to end the day feeling scared and hopeless.
      1. katri likes this.
      2. katri
        katri
        Same lmao. Except it’s in reverse.
        Nov 5, 2018
    18. Red
      Red
      "It can be worse!" -No please! Already struggle with suicidal ideation as is. Life right now isn't sustainable, any less is a death sentence
      1. katri likes this.
      2. katri
        katri
        I can understand you. Just take it little by little. You can stand anything for 10 seconds and once those seconds are up. Start over.
        Oct 29, 2018
      3. Red
        Red
        @katri Thanks. What I really need to do is get out of the rut I am in. I am just a shell of a person. I really should be in counseling and on ADs but I'm not. Everything is piling up making it harder and harder to dig myself out. I am a completely dysfunctional person and starting to get old. It feels like it's too late.
        Oct 29, 2018
      4. katri
        katri
        You aren’t too old. Trust me, time works. Don’t give up because you’re in a rut. You’ll grow out of it.
        Oct 29, 2018
    19. Red
      Red
      I transferred my meds bc the pharmacy I used is right next to a fire station. Our f.stations don't have just trucks but air raid sirens too!
      1. Red
        Red
        So if you hear a fire truck siren, there is also an air raid siren going off to call in volunteers thanks to how my area handles fire fighting.
        Oct 28, 2018
    20. Red
      Red
      I am going to start putting some people on ignore. It's not out of ill will. Some posters are making my anxiety worse with their posts.
      1. 1000, katri, Jack Straw and 1 other person like this.
      2. View previous comments...
      3. Manny
        Manny
        I'm confused ,then what does ignore do? Or does it not work properly. @Red
        Oct 26, 2018
      4. Red
        Red
        You can't see the contents of their post but you can see that they posted. @Manny
        Oct 26, 2018
        Manny and Jack Straw like this.
      5. New Guy
        New Guy
        Excellent idea, I've done the same.
        Oct 27, 2018
    21. Red
      Red
      Huh. Feel like oversleeping gave me a T spike. What won't give you a spike, amirite?
      1. katri and Tinker Bell like this.
      2. Tinker Bell
        Tinker Bell
        Yes! We’ve all heard of waking up on the wrong side of the bed, well I’ve discovered I have a wrong side of my head. If I sleep too much on my good ear, my tinnitus is louder.
        Oct 25, 2018
        Jack Straw likes this.
    22. Red
      Red
      Wow. Seems it doesn't pay off to go cheap. My store brand magnesium tablets had talc in them! Trashed.
    23. Red
      Red
      I really feel I am about to lose it.
      1. Manny and Artazanasss like this.
    24. Red
      Red
      I don't know how I can keep carrying on. There's too many loud noises. Everyday no matter what I do I accidentally run into one.
      1. Gman likes this.
      2. Gman
        Gman
        Me too. I'm moving to a quieter place and will mostly be staying at home for a year at least.
        Nov 11, 2018
    25. Red
      Red
      I hate the drivers in this area today. It's not just one but CONSTANT barrage of cars revving their engines...in a 5mph shopping center. why
    26. Red
      Red
      Just a reminder: sugar free gum/soda is ototoxic if it is sweetened with aspartame!
      1. View previous comments...
      2. Red
        Red
        I'm not going to avoid every drug on the list or I'd never get help for my other problems. I was reading through it and was surprised aspartame was on it. Figured no one scrolls down past the medicine section.

        Some people on here don't take NSAIDs because they're ototoxic. The safety of aspartame is often called into question. It's enough for me but I don't have a soda/gum addiction.
        Oct 5, 2018
        Julien87 likes this.
      3. Julien87
        Julien87
        If you're talking about addiction that's another debate :) I also believe addiction to soda can be dangerous, and not only for the potential ototoxicity of aspartam
        Oct 5, 2018
      4. coffee_girl
        coffee_girl
        At this point i might as well just not eat anything =[
        Oct 6, 2018
    27. Red
      Red
      Being trapped in sorrow and constantly thinking about your condition(s) gets tiring. For me, I feel numb but that doesn't mean I am happy.
      1. housemzk likes this.
    28. Red
      Red
      @Contrast We need to figure out a good way to raise awareness and help people with H and poor lil Cindy!
      1. 1000 and Manny like this.
    29. Red
      Red
      @Contrast Why not take a break from the forums for a time?
      1. Contrast likes this.
    30. Red
      Red
      Amazing. I'm astonished how quiet my tinnitus has been in the face of all this hyperacusis, TTTS, and visual snow. What does it mean??
      1. Manny and Deamon22 like this.
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  • About

    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Northeast USA
    Tinnitus Since:
    06/2017
    Cause of Tinnitus:
    Noise Exposure (Headphones)
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