Marina Moon

I guess it's all my fault, i wanted this treatment to work and i kept going, i'm an idiot for hoping this would help me. But now i'm stopping with this PT (i hate how my mom viewed these sessions as 'social visits' and kept flirting with my PT instead of viewing them as real physical therapy sessions to treat my chronic pain and asking geniuine ass questions about my condition)

Not that my PT could answer any of my questions. He doesn't specialize in TMD. I'm the idiot for going back. Chronic pain changed my opinion on living, on simply existing--I am no longer a fan of it and i think it's dreadful. Everyday is torture. I just have to distract myself long enough to make it through each day.

i think i lost all value to my parents when i cancelled taking the MCAT last summer, no longer pursuing the medical school route. To them, that cancellation usurped the beginning of my chronic pain; the end of a potential career as a doctor continues to overshadow my hellish condition. I'm broken, full of sorrow and anger.

Me too! Don't want it either. Mine was July 3rd.

Oh yes. I wonder what would happen if all the good people in this world came together. We could stop them. We could create a world worth living in.

Paresthesia

Same here, late June is when I woke up with sudden hearing loss, two year anniversary coming up.

Yeah so many dates and milestones ruined

@Marina Moon What specifically makes you think its brain related?

@Higo I've had a lot of neurological symtpoms that pointed to multiple sclerosis, or trigeminal neuralgia because of the facial pain.

@Marina Moon Definitely get an MRI done to try exclude the possibility. Hopefully there isn't any issue on the scan.

my mind screams at the idea of more pain, I can't take it anymore. i just can't

Sorry to read.. (saying to myself too).. trying to be kind to yourself..

my mom was trying on outfits today, which is a good sign, because she always tries on outfits, like putting on her own fashion shows, in the mornings (usually). So she's resuming activities again, but slowly, she had to stop because it worsened some symtpoms. But it's a start. She's also taking time off work.

horrid thought. My mom should have just fell on me. Sure, I would have been in more pain that i absolutely cannot take, but at least my mom would be fine.

@Marina Moon you are an incredibly caring daughter, but stop saying this.Your mum seems to be improving and you have enough pain to deal with. More than enough.

how it go?

@SumGuy She just wanted to check out on how i'm doing, how i'm liking physical therapy, though my pain is still persisting but she doesn't know why i have facail pain. It got worse yesterday actually, and then my mom suffered a head injury and had to be rushed to the hospital. She fainted then fell backwards and hit her head on the ground. Life...ain't too great rn....

Me two :)

You’re stronger than you realize :)

@ZFire I have learned that many of us here are <3 Thank you i'm trying to be :)

Yeah, We’re definitely all resilient.

Cheers :)

Well, at least he's confident that i'll never need rotator cuff surgery lol

But a few things are for certain. TMD is real, and people can have this same condition but experience it differently (the same is true for other conditions and diseases.) It is a multifactorial condition that has different causes and different treatments because no two patients are the same. Alot of poeple have it, but not alot of people treat it. We need more TMD doctors, because we are in a crisis.

i wonder if my PT doesn't verbally explain much to me is because he has facial pain because of his TMD. That or he simply isn't one for explaining things.

Let me know when you do! Because I am wondering the same thing!

waking up is the hardest part of the day. Knowing whats waiting for you :(

I hope theres a treatment soon.

I cant remember the last time I watched a movie since getting T lol

@SumGuy I still watch shows, but never with ear buds. I can't give up movies and shows XD I just can't understand why my dad watches movies with the volume insanely high!

I'm sorry to hear that, I never knew something like that could happen. Are you able to get treatment for it?

@SumGuy I'm currently undergoing physical therapy, it kind of has been working, it's tough to say at this point. However, the PT i've been working with doesn't know how to treat TMD and constantly tells me it's a separate issue, but i know he is blatantly wrong.

Alot of poeple don't know about TMD because we're never told about it and not alot of doctors treat it, and when doctors do know they just say 'oh you've been grinding you're teeth, you need to see a dentist and wear a mouth guard' which is a very narrow tunnel vision view of a multifactorial condition that differs vastly between patients. I've visited so many doctors and none know how to help. I'm very bitter lol

Sounds good!

@Tryn2BHopeful I bought pancake mix and i hope to make them this week! I'm either going to make them plain or make them blueberry pancakes.

Mmmm... blueberry pancakes!

@Tryn2BHopeful The middle of my back has been cracking for a while but this is the first time i've had pain bending down, maybe it's because i've been using a foam roller for my back in PT. I was fine during the exercises, I don't know, but i'm going to stop using the foam roller.

every time i explain my symptoms the doctors just stare at me in silence, or when i tell the PT about my jaw, he just says it's a separate problem.....it feels like i know more than the doctors do when it should really be the other way around.

@Marina Moon 100%

Funny how no one in my family believed me at the time, so i had to go find evidence aka go through the public camera footage of the beach that particular day and find the exact moment when the demon with wings hit me. It frickin body slammed me from the sky like a pro wrestler. Happy ending, I found the footage and my family believed me. Who knew it was foreshadowing to later problems....

Anyway, never eat food on the beach. Seagulls are aggressive and when they see food they will go for it. Or at least eat under an umbrella, in your car, or any place with a roof in which a seagull won't be able to flop like a cannon ball on top of you.

i'm starting to think i'm a magnet for bad luck....

I hate to say this, but i cried this morning, hard. I give myself full permission to cry on april 1st, until then stay positive and just think about what i need to do to get through this.