Missing another one of my kids school events. Breaks my heart.
Tryn2BHopeful
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Think I got a new "pure tone" in my left ear... its relatively low atm, I don't hear it all the time and is maskable unlike all the others but is definitely new... ugh... Even avoiding everything and protecting my ears... Trying to not feel doomed. My right ear on the other hand seems to be doing better than it was, but still loud. The "hum" is still very hard to deal with.
T is very loud today. Trying to deal with it and not break down. Seems like the same pattern every week. M-OK, T-Moderate, W - Severe, T- Moderate, F-OK, Sat -OK, Sun - Severe. OK is not great but livable. Its the humming, hissing, ear sensations... ugh... Sometimes I just don't understand the point of "this".
I am really trying... but I am not sure I can "recover" from this more than once. I should of been more careful. Water under the bridge as they say. Every time it seems like things are going in a positive direction, T smacks me down again. Life can be cruel.
Interesting thought - Is Anxiety and Stress a possible precursor to T? As our brain undergoes whatever changes that ultimately causes T, do we experience it as a result? There seems to be a link, but I wonder which is the result of the other.
Ear sensitivity... guessing Hyperacusis isn't improving like it did before.. maybe I am not giving it long enough.... Seems like I am in for another 2 year wait and see, after spending the last 2 years getting to a good point. Stupid... and could of been avoided... but.. it seemed safe... Not sure if I can do 2 more years.
I cant go out anymore... I don't do anything. I am scared to go to my kids graduation in a couple of months. Despite some of the positive messages I have received on this site, I just feel like I am spiraling. T is worse then the first time I got it, maybe even catastrophic... I have always tried to avoid labeling it... but IDK. Nothing I do helps, sound is reactivity and silence is humming.
I always considered my T moderate... but I think its severe now...trying to hold a job, raise kids, do everything that one needs to do to live is exhausting wit h T... Nobody seems to notice or care that I am struggling... After almost 2 years you would think I would simply know that. Its the life of someone with T.
Thinking about my future is depressing... Will I make it 1, 2, 5 years? I am still feeling the latest set back more than ever, persistent humming, higher hissing, ear discomfort and sensitivity... Guess I am cooked....
Why is T so fricken variable?... one day its ok, the next is pure hell. Ugh... what did we do to deserve this?!
Well it seems that I recovered some, but not back to where I was prior... I never thought I would find myself wishing for my old T back. I always wondered how I would be able to deal with worse... I guess I am finding out... You just do, because there is no choice. Still hoping it improves with time again.
Feb 3rd Texas Roadhouse is donating all profits for Dine In and Out orders to the ATA. I told my wife this, and she said... What is the ATA?... I am thinking where have you been the last almost 2 years.
When I got tinnitus I didn't even know what it was. Now it alters everything in my life. Awareness is lacking!
Sadly I knew I would be back here some day. That it would get worse eventually, but I hoped it wouldn't. A simple thing I thought, a middle school orchestra concert, it shouldn't be to bad, and it wasn't until 4 days later. I still don't know if this is a spike or the new normal. Somewhat milder day yesterday, followed a terrible day, with reactivity and my brain just doesn't want to deal with it.
Well a positive if there is one to pull from this... The distortion or sound when I speak has gone away about 95%. T is still more reactive and piercing than before and its been humming in silence like crazy (that is an ongoing off and on thing), hopefully that's temporary as well... only time will tell. Don't get complacent is all I can say, no matter how well you think your doing it take minutes to undo it all.
Yesterday was ok. Today is horrible, just loud and sensitive, happy birthday to me
Hey - happy holidays to you and your family. Same thing happened to me yesterday. This disorder is insane. I am mostly isolated. Every time I do anything there is a price. Keep well my friend.
Had a good run and was doing well... but this disorder seems to always get you. Ears are sensitive again and new sound in my right ear when I speak. My fault I got complacent. I hope this is just a spike and will improve.
It looks like you made it my friend. Just the noise ain't that bad.
do you have any experience with gabapentin?
1 year ago today this started. A journey to hell, hope I can make it back. Wishing everyone the best.
Still alive. T still sucks most of the time. Hope everyone is doing as well as they can.
This site is to much. My T sucks but I don't wish to die. I understand the pain here but positivity and hope is all I got going for me.
Need to exercise again, but I am so beaten down by T most days of the week I just cant get motivated to do it.
@Tryn2BHopeful hello long time. Sorry to bother you. Are you still on low Mirt? I was thinking of taking 3.5 mg tonight. I remember it helped my T but may have worsened my H. If you are still on it do you find it helps. I remember you were having a hard time getting off of a low dose.Any reason. Thank you
Woke up from a dream where I was suddenly using a drill, to realize it was the sound in my head...Its going to be a day...
This is surreal
Surviving...The idea of getting better is long lost. I have moments of joy and moments of despair, its a ride I just cant get off of.
Easter - Instead of being happy to see family, I will be looking for a corner to hide in and waiting for a spike in T.
I remember when I used to try to post uplifting quotes on this page. T just beats the shit out you. Cant give up though, even if I wanted to -
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