Any single people try to pursue a relationship after getting tinnitus?

Discussion in 'Support' started by Asian, Jun 28, 2014.

    1. Asian

      Asian Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      4 weeks
      Hah! Its tough but I think I've accepted that the ship has sailed and I've missed the boat.

      "Hi - Your cute - wanna come sit in a dark quiet room with me? We can talk about masking ?" lol

      The more I think about it the less likely it seems. You could argue I'm being pessimistic but if I was a woman - I wouldn't want to date me.
       
    2. RichL
      Inspired

      RichL Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Palmerston North NZ
      Tinnitus Since:
      1990
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic trauma
      Very pessimistic!
      If a person falls in love with you, having T or not won't make the world of difference, in fact if it is a problem, me personally, I wouldn't want a relationship with that person anyway!
      They will fall in love, warts and all!
      There are so many story's about real people having a relationship with people that are dying and it still dosen't stop the relationship!
      Wait till you habituate and T will become not such a major.
       
      • Agree Agree x 3
    3. dan
      Chatty

      dan Member Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Toronto, Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2011
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loud noise
      @Asian , look at the bright side, you will never have a nagging wife, never have a shouting argument, never worry about throwing your socks in the middle of the room, never worry about not putting the toilet seat back down, never having a mother in-law, never being told what to do, never worrying about your sexual performance, spend money on whatever you want, sleep with whomever you want, don't have to repaint the walls, never worry about hurting anybody's feelings, never need to impress anybody or live up to any expectations...
      I can go on all night if you want!
       
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    4. nogood
      Procrastinating

      nogood Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      ototoxicity/infection
      Love and relationships can be complex at times, but First off you have to accept urself for what you are then the rest will fall into place by itself.
       
      • Like Like x 1
    5. nogood
      Procrastinating

      nogood Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      04/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      ototoxicity/infection
      Perks of being single. All is good when you are young and single but when time passes and grow old you maybe filled with regrets and loneliness. . (Just my own thoughts)
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    6. dan
      Chatty

      dan Member Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Toronto, Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2011
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loud noise
      When you grow old, you can easily find an old woman to sit in a quiet place with you and talk about masking while she talks about her arthritis....just a thought...
       
      • Funny Funny x 2
    7. Stina
      Psychedelic

      Stina Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Tartu
      Tinnitus Since:
      11/13
      ;D I already have that so Im a perfect match....
       
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    8. RicoS
      Alienated

      RicoS Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Netherlands
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Stress or Acoustic trauma
      I think you can talk about you tinnitus and if she realy loves you ...she understands
       
    9. cullenbohannon
      Thinking

      cullenbohannon Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2014
      Asian dont put these thoughts in your head about how you cant do certain things. You absolutely can get in a relationship with T. You wont be going to concerts , but you can still do many other things, maybe think outside the box a bit, maybe certain movies are to loud, many aren't, especially with ear plugs, take advantage of the outdoors, and nature, i don't know you but im sure you have interests you enjoy, you can still go out to restaurants and other things. I recently started going out again , not to loud clubs but bars and hanging out with friends, and starting meeting girls again. I think it was @Steve if i remember correctly, he said don't worry about what you cant do think of all the things you can. Something like that i think. Keep your head buddy, you'll be fine. YOU HAVE NOT MISSED THE BOAT.
       
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    10. benryu
      Anime

      benryu Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Montreal
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2008
      @Asian , those are some wise words from @cullenbohannon he is very right.

      (Plus if I were a girl, I prefer my partner to have T. rather than some STD. Plus you can market that to her by saying, "see babe, I can't go clubbing or meet other girls, it's a guarantee I am gonna be your exclusivity).
       
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    11. Telis

      Telis Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      11/2013
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Drugs barotrauma
      Find someone else with T! I mean man, tyere is a way around anything if you want it bad enough. I have raging T, I mean my ears are absolutely screwed, and I know there is a way around this mess, you just have to find it!! I still want to have kids, wife etc. ( I will figure it out if I want it bad enough) maybe not easy but if you want it I'm sure you will get it! Just how bad do you want it man!!? It's up to you! I agree, it's way way harder but you can't limit yourself, otherwise the T wins. And we don't need T taking from us anymore, take back the power!!

      Everything is harder for us, but fight it!! Fight it with all you have!! You can have what everyone else has, just takes more work. And when you get it you will know you are stronger than most of the population!!

      I hope, (defininatly not saying I can) take my own advise, this is a every day battle, takes a lot out of a guy. I don't think anyone gets it unless they are there. I am defiantly there.
       
      • Like Like x 1
    12. Steve
      Creative

      Steve Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Sheffield, UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      2003
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Flu, Noise-induced, Jaw trauma
      That's right @cullenbohannon and perfectly quoted. There's so much that you can do and if you really think of it there is still more than you can ever hope to fit into a lifetime.

      My opinion is that if you met a girl that didn't accept you with your tinnitus and the limitations that it may impose, then is that the right girl for you? To me that sounds self centred and uncaring, two things that would turn me off completely.
       
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    13. Telis

      Telis Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      11/2013
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Drugs barotrauma
      I think what will hurt me personally more than the physical limitation is my sour mood from the constant irritation of T. Went from a easy going person to kinda miserable a lot of the time.
       
    14. Denny

      Denny Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      Jan 2013
    15. luckyman316

      luckyman316 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      09/2013
      I've actuall dated 2 girls after getting my T. Still friends with both of them. One just laughed at me, told me I had issues and if it happened to her then she would have ripped her ears off. The other one was understanding about it and even tried to get me to go to an accupuncture thing for it... which I declined. I don't want or need needles in me.
       
    16. ampumpkin
      Amused

      ampumpkin Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Montreal
      Tinnitus Since:
      Onset: 12/2007 Increase: 04/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      2007: Meds(Antidepressant) 2014: Meds(Antibiotics)
      I was with someone at the onset of T in 2007 and we stayed together until 2010. T was only an issue between us when it first started, otherwise, it was a nonissue.

      I have been in 2 relationships since 2010 and T was never an issue either. It has only become an issue since May when it increased. I am now single. I started talking to a guy before the T increase and when it increased, I told him about it. He seemed very understanding.
       
    17. Telis

      Telis Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      11/2013
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Drugs barotrauma
      Everyone's got their solution! Like it's a quick fix or something!
       
    18. Telis

      Telis Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      11/2013
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Drugs barotrauma
      Maybe a T dating section here would be good! Haha.
       
    19. Ken219
      Frustrated

      Ken219 Member

      Location:
      New York Area
      Tinnitus Since:
      Summer of 1990
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise exposure?
      I hope you fully habituate soon and live a normal life. Just don't go back to sour!
       
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