Don’t Know If I Can Keep Going

I'd try the Passion flower drops first. I use these often. 10 drops help me, you can go up to 30-60. Just drop in right in your mouth. Forget mixing with water. Has a slight sweet taste to it.
Then I'd try the PharmaGABA. I use this one. Suck on them, dont chew him. More effective that way. You can take this throughout the day, every day so you are loaded up on GABA. Building it up helps.
And then make sure you are well supplemented with Magnesium. For me it makes a huge different in my daily general anxiety, I can tell when I am low on mag if I dont take it for a week. I use this one. Just dissolves in hot water. Can add cold water later. Easy breezy.

These 3 things are bound to have an effect. It does for me and seriously keeps my general daily anxiety at bay which usually consists of rapid heart beat throughout the day for what ever sub conscious reason. I just feel normal when im on this stuff. Especially the magnesium. Thats like the foundation, the other 2 are when things get elevated.

 

Thanks Sean!
Will definetly give it a go.
Has this had any positive effect on your tinnitus?

 

When anxiety would cause my tinnitus to be louder, then yes it helped a great deal. But generally speaking, I am not sure since have habituated well and I was always more focused on my anxiety and heart rate. Also my tinnitus is like an 8 so any general change, I may not notice.

 

@TracyJS where did you go? Many of us worry about you and have tried to help you. I just hope you are okay and know that people care.

 

@TracyJS

Are you feeling any better?

 

Hi Tracy, I just wanted to reach out and see how you and Riley are doing?I just read some of the posts above, and I thought I would share with you some thoughts on Nortripyline. I am not a fan of medication, and I feel fortuanate that in my 50's the only meds. I am taking is baby aspirin. Then this happened, and I went in to see my doctor, and he mentioned Nortripyline. He told me it would not help with the t, but it would help with the anxiety. WOW, was he right. It may take a couple of days to take hold, but it has definitely helped me get some sleep, even when my ears are angry. I also play tinintus sound therapy at night. I have found that I can now sleep for 5 - 7 hours, I may wake up, and then 5 min. later I fall back asleep for another 2 or 3. The only aside is I wake up with a dry mouth, a glass of water and it is gone. I just thought I would share how it is working for me.
I know this is hard, but keep going, and keep hoping. Riley needs you!
Best wishes,
JohnCC

 

That’s great, John that you have found something to help. I’m really happy you are finding some relief.
Thank you for asking about me. I think I have made some serious mistakes to worsen things for me.....

 

Hi Tracy, Mistakes are really just practise runs until you get it right. I am still in the learning curve myself. When I go out, ear plugs in or not? Should have put them in, ops, ears just went, and I just learned something. I am finding that not just living with t. but rather life itself is really just about making mistakes, and then the question becomes do you learn and not repeat the same mistake, or do you just keep beating yourself up about making the same mistake. There is a saying, a lesson is repeated until learned. I have found that to do quite true.
So, you may have made some mistakes, did you do your best with what you knew at that time? Most likely you did what you thought was best with what you knew, just like everyone else. So I guess that makes you human, so don't beat yourself up over making mistakes, that only hightens the stress, that makes your t. worse, and so on. Learn from them and move on to the best of your ability. Trust me, I have made a number of mistakes, and a number of them were repeats, until I learned to do something different. Did that make me, or you, bad or wrong, no, just human.
So did you learn from your mistakes? Feel free to share if you want, and we can talk about them. Just remember, you can bounce back and heal, and learn to live with it, and you and Riley can have a good life. So how is Riley?
Take care, and good luck,
JohnCC

 

@John CC
My mistake is a pretty big one, unfortunately. I am in trouble I’m afraid.

 

@TracyJS,
I hope your ok duck,welcome phone me anytime ,your always in my thoughts .
lots of love glynis xxx

 

Hi Tracy We all make mistakes, some bigger and some smaller. I am wondering did this mistake affect your t. directly (going to a concert without ear protection), or did something happen in some other part of your life that caused you to stress, and that stress has affected your t.? Let me know, if I didn't care and take an interest, I like all the other people who have responded on this forum, would not have talked to you and encouraged you like we have. You do have lots of support, take Gynis for example.
Best wishes,
JohnCC

 

@TracyJS You have company. I was on a certain path and then 'made a mistake' which derailed me for ~2 months. Time is the biggest part of the recovery, because effects and changes and any progress happens (it seems) at glacial speed.

Please don't be down on yourself.

 

@TracyJS ,
Please can you update us on how you are duck!
Don't worry about being honest or negative as we can respond better.
We are here so don't suffer alone as we all do care about you.

love glynis xxx

 

@glynis, @New Guy @Ed209 @Starthrower @John CC @PortalNaut and many others.....

I know some have asked how I am. I have not posted in a while, not because I don’t care about my friends here. I do very much. I just don’t want to Keep reporting distress.
And my many mistakes.
I took medication and made things much worse.
Didn’t realize I was taking a Benzo, but I was. Tinnitus is now worse.

I don’t know if there is hope for me anymore.
This is pure agony.
And I did it to myself. How will I get through this?
Is there anyone here that has made it through?

My friend from New Hampshire came to stay with me for a week. His concern so great.

He left this morning. We hugged goodbye in the dark hours of the morning at the train station. He’s afraid he won’t see me again.

I’m in so much pain. The sadness is too much. The anxiety is too great. I’m lost.

Thank you to everyone here who has been so kind and supportive and has cared enough to respond. ❤️

 

I hope one day that we can irridicade the pain you feel, from existence, for everyone. I know I keep saying the same thing, Tracy, but time really is a wonderful thing. So many of us have made it through this tunnel of hell, so never lose hope. In a couple of years time your story could very well be completely different to what it is today; I have lived through times of intense depression and anxiety where I too believed my pain was insurmountable, but I ultimately came through.

It’s tragic to see anyone suffering when all we want to do is flick a switch and make you better. I do believe you will get through this horrendous time in your life and I believe it will ultimately make you stronger.

I wish there was more we could do.

 

Tracy, please hang on. The darkness will pass. What medication did you take and for how long? Did you stop taking it cold turkey?
Your mind will learn immunity against the noise and fear and agony will pass. Just hang in there, please.

All the best,
TLion

 

I cannot offer you any help, because none of my words can lower the volume and intrusiveness of your Tinnitus... but Do NOT blame yourself for taking the med...you are not a doctor.
Blame the person who has prescribed you this, without properly explaining what it is and what it does.
Meds can still be tapered off even if they are Benzos..but you need to go slow.

 

Hello Tracy. I'm new to this forum, and a stranger too you of course. But like many I have seen your texts here and my heart aches for you. Looks like we both came down with t at about the same time. My first 3 months were very bad, I almost took my own life, and I mean very close. I'm very glad I did not, my t is still here but it has faded a bit. I have always suffered from depression but the onset of t made it much worse, so I'm back on meds and doing better. I sit here with my oldest cat on my lap, thinking of you and your precious cat. Please please hang in there, everyone is right, it will get better, it might not leave us but it will get better. There are a lot of beautiful caring supportive people in this forum, listen to them and try try to take all of their advice. This Canadian stranger is hoping for all the best in your case.

 

I took Zolpidem for 3 months. Didn’t realize it’s like a Benzo. Started having severe anxiety/panic in August. Now have crossed over to Valium for a long eventual taper. I feel like I may have doomed myself.
Maybe should have just tapered from the zolpidem. Too late now.
So confusing. I’ve just made everything worse, I fear.

 

@TracyJS ,
I took Zolpidem for about 6 weeks but changed to a low AD for sleep.

Medication can cause problems but I do think given time it will settle down.

I'm having a buger of a time with constant Meniere's attacks and I'm positive coming off Venlafaxine has done it.
I know antidepressants can trigger Meniere's attacks but after ringing Menieres UK today they said they didn't think I would cause attacks and the doctor didn't know either .

When I had a spinal tap done years ago the I asked could it trigger an attack and they said they don't think it will and ho boy they were wrong.

Very sick and dizzy and raging ears at the moment and it's been 3 attacks in the last two weeks knocking the hell out of me ,it's like a twister going off in your head and ears ...

You will get through this but it takes time so be really kind to yourself and go at your own pace ...

Reach out to us anytime and know we are all sending love and hugs your way.
love glynis xxx

 

Hi Tracy As I write this, the t. in my right ear is getting so loud it is hard to focus on writing this. Did I do anything wrong? No, it just happened, I turned my head and it happened. Should I blame myself for turning my head? No. Should you blame yourself for taking Benzo when you did not know that was what it was. No. The number of times I have in my life did something thinking it was the right thing to do, and WOW was it the wrong thing to do. What that has taught me is that you can not BLAME YOURSELF FOR ACTING IN GOOD FAITH, for doing what you honestly thought was the best choice at that time.

Once you start to realize this fact, it is amazing how you can start to look at yourself, and all the decisions you have made, differently. You begin to look at all the decisions, choices, and actions differently. You can start to look at them without blame, because there is no one to blame. All the choices were made honestly, and with the best information you had at the time.

So what this means is that once you stop blaming yourself, you can start to realize that that is how we as humans learn and to make a different decision in the same circumstances. I have this feeling that next time you will not take the same medication. Congrats, you just learned. Do you blame a 2 year old child for putting her hand on the flame of a candle? No, that is how the child learns. As we get older, we still learn just with different examples.

Maybe now it is time for you to learn that you are not to blame for any on this. You are not a bad person, nor are you a person to blame for this and that. No, you are just human and you, like me, are learning everyday when new options and choices are placed in front of us. Do I make all the perfect choices? Let me put it this way, if my name was Pinnochio, and I said yes I have always made perfect choices, my nose would not only go through the wall on the other side of the room, but out the building, across a road, and stop somewhere this side of Kansas (I live in Ontario, Canada).

So, please Tracy, stop blaming yourself for being human and making a choice with the best of intention as you try to make your life better. Once you start to do that, I really believe you will start to look at things differently, and you may even start to really feel and believe and see this thing called hope. As Glynis noted above "You will get through this but it takes time so be really kind to yourself and go at your own pace.", and you will. Your t. will fade, your life, and the one you share your life with Riley, and your friend from New Hampshire, will grow and become richer and richer.

Is not that what every human deserves? You are human, so start to see the hope, see the future that can be in front of you, and realize you are not to blame. The medications will work themselves out, your t. will work itself out and so will you. Have hope, accept yourself for the wonderful person who is trying her best, and for being human.

Take care, and best wishes,
JohnCC

 

@Ed209 @TLion @glynis @John CC @RCS-canada
@Wolfears
Thank you for your responses of care, support and encouragement. You all have your own challenges, and yet, you generously take the time to express such care and kindness to me.

Glynis- I’m sorry you are having such a horrible time. I hope it’s getting a bit better for you ❤️

 

Stay strong and hang in there sweetie! Your post make me a bit sad, I hope your family can comfort you. I never had Meniere but I have dealt with plenty of sickness, plenty of brutal vertigo/being dizzy/head pressures and it is just horrible. I truly feel that meds can be very helpful in some areas and very bad in others.

You are a blessing to this site and I wish you all the best!

 

@TracyJS

I spoke to Tracy this week and I want to let everyone know she's making progress. I'm proud of the effort she's making to start moving forward. Way to go Tracy!

 

Really hope you are ok; thoughts are with you during this trying time.

 

Tracy is one incredibly brave lady.
I think of her every single day.
Well done babe,
Dave x

 

Hi Tracy After having taken a little break from the forum (a little mental balancing for myself) I have returned to the forum and I told myself that when I do, one of the first things I was going to do was to send out a note your way to say hi and see how you and Riley are doing. I have noticed that the last post are getting a little older, and I have not really checked nor looked for other more recent posts from you to the t. world so please forgive me if I am behind with the news. I hope you are finding it is getting easier, mine is fluctuating and sometimes loud and sometimes not so, but I like to think that I am getting closer to healing with each passing day. I stop to appreciate when it is nicer to me, and think down the road it will get better when it is not nicer to me.
Well please say hi to Riley, and I hope this note finds you, and finds you healthier.
John

 

Hey Tracy, and you too Riley. Just wanted

Hey Tracy, and yes Riley too. Just wanted to say 'Hi' and check in to see how you are doing. You are not forgotten, and I wanted to make sure you knew this. I hope it is getting better. I must admit, the world of t. is not fun, but it is where we find ourselves. Mine goes up and down, with a complication or two arising from time to time, but these are the things of life, and the world of t.
I hope you are finding things getting better, and take care of yourself, and Riley too!!!
John

 

I was fine till i started reading these negative posts - i think im about to loose it - I need someone to tell me it will be ok..