Please Help Me, I'm Desperate (Problems Started After Trying to Get a Wax Blockage Out By Myself)

@Chris Waller ,
You have had great advice already so to add to it -
If you feel off balance and a bit nauseous you can get tablets for it.
Buccastem off the chemist or somthing stronger off your doctor like Betahistine or Proclorperazine.
Love glynis

 

Thank you Glynis i will ask i my doctor next time i see her.
all the best.

 

You might not like what I have to say here, but know it comes from someone with severe T and H and 6 weeks in I am almost habituated...and this comes from a place of empathy, compassion and wholesomeness. I want the best for you, as I do for the rest of us here.

@Chris Waller, I just wanted to interject your conversation with @Michael Leigh (apologies Michael). First of all, I am British. I live in Chicago now, but I am British. Grew up in Blackburn (the hell hole that it was did I say that out loud?). I just wanted to make that bit clear - so my psychology is British; not to be a slur but to highlight us Brits have a courage that sometimes we overlook or forget to tap into - dont we have lions as part of our insignia, that represents warriors and and bravery?

We all have our own journeys, and our own pasts, and our own ways of managing stressful situations. There is no denying your struggle - listen, I went f!!! deaf 6 weeks ago and now have a dentists drill in my head 24/7 amped up like a rock concert.

I broke once - once. And it was then that I decided I wasnt going to be defined or taken down with this, but I was going to grow, to become a better person from it. Yo have a relationship with someone for 6 years? Do you love her? And does she love you? If the answer are a resounding yes, deep down, which I am sure are regardless of surface level arguments and laments, then would it not be the most powerful experience of all to be that Lion and to step up, to step into the fear and the worry and to dig deep into a collective courage that makes you British, and rise above this, and become a hero to your partner and especially to yourself?

You mention in the first quote you are going to try - theres no trying; only doing or not doing. Take it on. Most of the times the thoughts in your head are which make the matter worse. This is where I respectfully disagree with @Michael Leigh - anti-depressants. In my view, and I respect too that others see the world differently, typically the tool of anti-depressant medication is the last option....

Which leads me to the next piece "there is not much anyone can do right now? THERE ABSOLUTELY IS. You can start taking action yourself. And it seems you are; all sorts of things are being done that you have shared - I dont see any mention about how you will deal with your inner world, just outer world solutions. Here are some things you can try that might be as effective as anti-depressants:

1. Mindfulness Meditation
2. Acceptance Meditation
3. Cognitive Behavioral therapy and Cognitive Restructuring
4. Laughing
5. Taking care of your diet, reducing sugar (massively IMO), making sure only good food goes in your mouth.
6. Build an action plan, a strategy abou what oyu will do this week, and next week and the week after - future planning gives your brain a mission to grab on to with respect to how to cope, and helps with the hope.
7. Become curious about what works and doesnt, and when things become overwhelming, learn to see how you are thinking.

Thats a start. If I may offer something as a servant - I pick up a way of thinking that dwells on the negatives. Thats part of the human condition, but will not serve you right now - keep a journal on when you automatically choose a negative way of thinking and then monitor how you felt as result of that thought. Then challenge it with something positive. For example, you create a bleak picture of what will happen if you lose your job; even I was ready to swing from the rafters reading it DONT DO THAT. So then, what else could you do? Lets think:

1. What would happen if you go to your girlfriends parents and explain from a heartfelt wholesome place, that you are suffering at the moment and you do need to take some time off work to re-group and get centered, and that you would like them to support you with this?
2. If you could offer to take a week off work, and that you would re-pay the rent debt over the next couple of weeks, would that be something worth asking?

The problem with the second quote is that you disempowered yourself, not consciously, but you did. You made yourself a victim to this situation, and then made it intractable. It isnt intractable. Do you have to dig deep? F!! yeh!!! We all do. Can you dig deep @Chris Waller?? YES you can. Will there be tough times ahead? F!!! yeh there will. But again, we can choose to get back up......or not. Or not in my view is when you need anti-depressants, and at that point it is a serious matter.

Dont let yourself be broken by this. Try to spot your negative catastrophizing and change it, and know that people live happy full and enriched lives T. I have met them. I have a client who has had Menieres for 25 years. In her first few years her story shook me to the core - but she never went on anti-depressants (and she is American and they throw these things at you with reasonable health insurance), and she carved out a career to becoming a key exec at Groupon and is now an even bigger exec of a massive software company. During her 25 years she went through multiple operations, eventually went completely deaf in her left ear, and is now losing her hearing in the right ear - along with all of the effects of Menieres. She still gets drop attacks, and had one as a key note speaker at a conference, right before speaking. I have suspected Menieres Chris, so there were two ways to respond to this story when she told me - abject panic! or to see that while she had her trials for sure, WE ALL DO IN LIFE - that is absolute. T for you right now is trial, as is mine. I count my blessings its not something far worse, and I look at what I can take from this to become a better person...with a story of triumph and courage and vulnerability and pain but overall, growth in my heart and a life experience that becomes more complete. Adversity is what shapes us into who we truly want to become, unless we let it break us.

And for the record, I use alcohol in a mechanized fashion with wine in the evenings depending on how my sleep has gone through the week. As they say back home "nowt rong with dat"

Good luck my friend,

mf

 

Thank you Mettafort reading this has made me feel a little bit better, as ive stated before i am trying methods to improve sleep and day time hearing, i have found that rain sounds and ( smooth brown noise ) helps a lot i can barely hear the tinnitus when its playing

I guess i could make some arrangements my mum did say she will help me i really need it. problem is my girlfriend is not a great one for sympathy and im not sure how long she can cope with me being like this, thats why im not talking to her too much about it.

I will try the methods you have mentioned in the next few days, just downloading 10 hours of rain sound to test out for tonight

will post tomorrow
night.

 

Hi @Mettafort
You have written an interesting post and if @Chris Waller chooses to follow some of your advice and it works for him then I will be pleased. Respectively however, I disagree with much of what you've said but shan't go into too much detail as you obviously have good intentions for Chris' well being. I will say this though. I have had tinnitus for many years and counselled many people with the condition who have taken the proactive approach as you have suggested, against my advice and regretted it.

When tinnitus is loud and intrusive especially in the early stages, one needs to be calm and patient which isn't easy. Attempting to try and fix it by trying lots of different treatments is not a good idea. Often, a person becomes stressed and frustrated during the process and as a result the symptoms become worse which is what a person doesn't want. Tinnitus is not a quick fix. I advise you to be cautiously optimistic about your own habituation happening so quickly. Please believe me nothing would please me more than to know you've arrived at it within such a short space of time.

However, the habituation process is a mysterious one with many twists and turns along it's path. Just when a person thinks they've turned a corner and all is well; a spike or the introduction of a new sound can be deflating. Take each day as it comes is my advice as you may not be completely out of the woods yet. I've seen this happen many times and hope everything continues to go well for you.

All the best
Michael

 

Good on you @Chris Waller, you have this. Sometimes you will wobble, but you got this. Ending each day knowing at least one step forward was made is enough to help you feel some strength in difficult times. And yes, I see you doing a lot too, for sure. And that is profoundly encouraging - the rain sounds playing or smooth brown. I envy you - I cannot listen to anything at the moment. I sit with my wife with ear plugs in some nights, so I can barely hear the TV; noises and other things like fans just seem to rev up my tinnitus even louder.

And speaking as an older guy, with kids, there is definitely a different (completely different) perspective taken when someone stands up, puts their hand up and is not only vulnerable and asks for support - that takes great courage too - but also demonstrates in character that people can be trust them that they own their problem and are committed to the solution. Asking for help and support from your girlfriends parents with respect to the rent, done from the place of someone who has "got this", and just need a little support - that character will be completely different from someone who is bumbling along with real ownership, no real strength or courage; someone like that could be perceived as untrustable.

With respect to your girlfriend and not having much sympathy, I appreciate that. This could be a time for your relationship to blossom, to take you both to a deeper level emotionally, physically and spiritually. When we think about our own selfish needs in our relationships, then thats a relationship in the gutter. When we move out of the gutter we move into living in the houses along the streets, and in the relationship we meet our partners needs but we expect our needs to be met too - nobody wants to live in the gutter and most relationships live here or in the gutter. But to live in the palace of the kingdom that is your deep connetion with this girl - your only reason for living is to meet your partners needs, and her only reason for living is to unconditionally put your needs first too.

So at this time, let her know what your needs are. What you need from her, and ask her what she needs from you too. Let her know how serious this is - this is not a a demonstration of weakness but of great strength. We Brits have the stiff upper lip, but hen it comes to relationships thats old. Be vulnerable and honest with her, and she will then know where you are, and she will also go deeper with you when she sees you rising like a pheonix from this.

You got this.

mf

 

Hey @Michael Leigh,

I respect your opinion and experience, and I learnt a few things too so thank you.

mf.

 

Not to spam Chris's thread, I genuinely respect your advice. I understand the "take each day as it comes", and I take that onboard fully; thank you. I have noticed each day is different, both the day itself, my experience with t and h and then the sleeping arrangements. I did release myself to this process, and let go of needing a routine that I can depend on. That helped me let go of some frustrations and some worries I was harboring.

And yes, I realize I am only 6 weeks in, and you have a fuller, longer experience with this than I have; I respect that completely.

So thank you; I know your response came from the same place mine did.

Metta,

mf.

 

Sorry, I need to be straight. @Michael Leigh has had this thing for decades, did TRT twice, knows a lot about the subject and helped a lot of people here, including me. (Hey @Michael Leigh, love you man!). @glynis Knows a lot, is kind and caring and also helped a lot of us here (love you too @glynis!).

Most people feel better in a few months no matter what they do. This doesn't mean that they're experts or have neccesarily done something to make themselves better. Humility is an asset.

@Chris Waller, you're still in the acute stage and it may go away. My Tinnitus varied a lot at the beginning, I had some balance issues in the first week or so. Most doctors will tell you that after a consultation with an ENT, if there aren't any physical problems that should be treated, you should just give it some time and see if you get better. With any luck, you will get better by yourself. Even if your Tinnitus doesn't go away chances are very good that you will adapt and move on with your life.

About your job... do you protect your hearing? If not, it's a good idea to get some earplugs or muffs depending on the sound levels you subject yourself to. If you need help sleeping having a white noise machine near you (you can download an app for your phone) may help. I know it's hard, but try not to focus too much on the noises in your head. Keep the TV on, listen to some music, etc.

@Chris Waller, we've all been there, it gets better.

Best,
Zug

 

Hi @Zug A great post and mentioning all the important points. The main one not to be too optimistic and to take time with tinnitus especially in the early stages. One salient point that you mentioned which I hope you don't mind but I think I'll adopt it is: Most people feel better in a few months no matter what they do. This doesn't mean that they're experts or have necessarily done something to make themselves better. Humility is an asset. We learn from each other and I'll be keeping me eye you for some more great quotes!

Thanks for your kind words too much appreciated.
All the best
Michael

 

Hey Guys thanks for your replies, in response to my job I operate a large mechanical timber saw with 4 very large blades that spin very fast, I'm also around forklifts, nail guns air compressors etc.

I've been thinking I could actually live with the tinnitus so much easier if everything wasn't echoing in my head all the time. Does This mean my problem is more likely to just be a physical problem rather than hearing loss? Before this all happened my ear was working fine.

I'm due back to work tomorrow will post an update on how it goes.
Thanks all.

 

When did you notice a bad balance? You need to rule out that it is an infection so I hope your doctor ruled it out. Drinking water will also help against inflamation.

But balance issues might also be anxiety. I had a lot of dizzy spells knocking me over a few days after I got my T. It was gone when I calmed down. Calming down is hard to do. But the sound enrichment works, do not use headphones, and yoga works imo. I've never been a yoga guy or anything spiritual but I'm one now. Although lately I'm meditating more than doing actual yoga. Calming down breathing techniques are great, breath in slowely (count to 5) hold your breath, exhale slowely (count to 7) repeat. Eventually your heartrate will go down as will your stress. This technique even let me break an anxiety attack early on (with a blazing T and I was shaking) and I fell asleep 15 minutes after so it is a powerful anti stress technique that you can do. Also prevent stress by doing this as often as you can especially when going to bed.

But still, you're in the beginning phase and your body can fix this itself. We can't promise it'll go away but we also can't guarantee that it'll stay. Some people recover fast , while others take months and some even years. Unfortunally only time will tell.

 

I noticed balance issues about 8 days ago, my doctor said the inflammation is going down and the ear drum is healing but can't see behind my ear drum with an otoscope apparently.

I'm only really using headphones when asleep but they are not over my ears I lay them on pillow next to me playing either raining sounds or soft brown noise.

 

Ok that is good news. Remember to drink a lot of water.

Regarding your headphones, I suggest moving them further just to be on the safe side. And make sure that your headphones still aren't too loud. And always below your T.

 

Why do the headphones need to Be lower than the T? I can still here the T while they are on. I always hear it.

 

First because otherwise you'll set it too loud for your ears.

Second it helps if you don't remove your T completely to get used to the ringing in the meantime while you're having it. I know it's pseudo habituation but it's better than getting addicted to masking your sound.

 

Hi Chris, it could be one of many things which is why you ideally need to sit down with a Dr to get to the bottom of it. It could be a combination of things.

• Patulous Eustachian tube/s
• ETD
• Cholesteatoma
• Ménière's
• A Vestibular Disorder such as Labyrinthitis (depends how bad your dizziness is, unlikely based on your description.)
• Glue ear

Try doing one of the Vestibular manoeuvres such as the Epley, and see if that helps. This is only if your balance issues are caused by vertigo though? Which I don't think they are.

If your main symptoms are occlusion and Balance issues (without any dizziness), then it's highly suggestive of a blockage. Maybe even patulous ET.

There's no way of being accurate over the Internet though. That's why it's best you get assessed by a medical professional. If you have inflammation around your eardrum then it may be directly related to that.

 

Is it possible that air can move freely through the tubes yet thick fluid is still stuck behind the drum? thats my best guess by what i can feel.

I will be back to the doctor's next wednesday if it still has not cleared up, feeling a bit better about myself today hopefully it stays that way.

Thanks for the info guys been a great help.

 

I have to disagree with Micheal about the NHS. I praise them in all other ways, except for mental health and Tinnitus. In this case one can lead to the other. Of course it may depend on where you live in the UK. One Doctor I consulted even told me he had Tinnitus, his off the record advice was to get a bottle of scotch and down a quarter of it. I don't drink so that advice fell on deaf ears, if you excuse the pun. I had no follow up treatment, and I was basically told, tough tit you just have to get on with it. I have to get my prescription of sedative tablets abroad, because they won't supply more than 30 days worth here, though I do inform the doctors what I am taking. I do understand their advice on addiction, but I don't drink or smoke, or do drugs, and life without sleep is unbearable. Believe me we all know what you are going through, as someone previously said, don't beat yourself up about what you did to your ear. I got tinnitus from not wearing earplugs on a motorbike, I read warnings in magazines about wind rush in crash helmets causing Tinnitus, I never knew what tinnitus was. I used to get off of my bike a bit deaf from wind noise, the last big road trip I completed across Europe made me deaf for about a week. The tinnitus started about a month after that episode. Some people develop it for no apparent reason. I know the fear mate, I am a big burly lad, and tinnitus made me into a nervous mouse for quite sometime. Until one night after about five years of it, I laid on the couch and said to myself "it's not gonna kill me" it's a noise and that's it, when you think about it rationally that's what it is, just a noise. Don't get me wrong, I still get sleepless nights, I use a lot of distraction methods. Netflix is a great help, I just watch movies in bed on my lap top, if possible put the subtitles on the movie and read them, it's another distraction. I leave the lap top on battery only, and I am usually asleep before the film has finished. I have a lot of saved half watched films in my favourites. I did use a herbal spray called Rescue Remedy, to help me cope, I don't know if it was a placebo effect, but it did help a bit in stressful times, of which there were many. I found it pretty pointless trying to explain it to people, if you've never had it I don't think you can ever understand it. I met a guy once who had tinnitus, he started his own support group for Tinnitus sufferers, that was his way of coping. That's about all I can say, be strong, you will get through this.

 

Looks like we have a bit in common, i bought a brand new sports bike last year and because my balance is off and im always tired i cant ride it! I am scared that ill never be able to ride again. Today has been better i have not used headphones all day just playing games on my pc. Distraction is the key i guess. Also i think these anti anxiety pills are starting to kick in.

Can anyone tell why cant reply to anyone's message on here? thanks

 

If you have fluid behind the drum it should be visible on your tympanogram, as well as your audiogram (as conductive losses). Both are typically done during a hearing test with an audiologist.

 

Evening guys,
So i went to work today and it was ok i guess, had some really good ear defenders and couldn't hear the saw anywhere near as loud only problem it gets hot keeping the ear defenders on all the time.... struggled to concentrate a bit but got the job done.

I actually went for a ride after work ( no real balance issues today ) and for some unknown reason i don't even notice my ear problem when riding its like when i put the helmet on both ears feel the same... ( not sure what that means ) the T is still there pretty bad but im so tired so hopefully ill get a good rest tonight.

hope you are all doing well today.

 

Chris,

Glad life goes on for you, and wish you a good nights sleep.

mf

 

Thankfully my balance is okay now, I did have a bit of vertigo, not something I have experienced before. But I am okay now, have you been checked for meunières?

 

I totally understand you, I had a perforated eardrum and my ears felt clogged like for 2 months and a half, it has been almost 5 months after the onset and they still feel weird(both) and the tinnitus is present 24/7 since day one but I won’t let tinnitus control my life, even sometimes it gives me headache or earache, those days I use pink noise and ignore it as much as I can and continue my routine without paying too much attention to it. I know for a fact that eventually it will go away.

 

Hi @Ed209

There is a good reason it can take up to 6 months to see an ENT doctor with the onset of tinnitus under the NHS which a lot of people are unaware of. As I've mentioned in many of my posts: The ear is a very delicate organ and most ENT doctors prefer to leave the ear alone for up to six months providing the patient has straight forward tinnitus. By this I mean, there is no deafness, balance problems, persistent pain in the ears or dizziness. The best treatment for tinnitus is to leave it alone in the early onset of the condition. The tinnitus can go away and many people habituate within a 6 months. Starting treatment too early of any sought can easily make the tinnitus worse and for this reason doctors prefer to leave things alone. This is the reason, when many people go private and have a hearing test MRI scan and results are normal. The doctor often says, leave things alone for up to 6 months. If the tinnitus is still problematic after 6 months and a person is having difficulty coping, a referral to a Hearing Therapist or Audiologist who's trained in tinnitus management and treatment will be recommended.

Michael