dear members, its now almost a year that ive got tinnitus. it happened four days after a disc in my cervical spine prolapsed. guess its the somatic type of tinnitus. its a high-pitched whistle in both ears, my ears are ok,this must be something neurological because of the spine problems. so actually, if i look back, i know the first 3 months were pure hell. i thought my life is over forever- i cried day and night,for 3 months, thats how sad i was about my lost silence. although it is not very loud, nothing was the same anymore.something changed.and you dont know how precious silence is until you lost it. ok so far. this hard time is over, and the last months my tinnitus tends to get a bit more silent than in the beginning, not much ,but a bit. now my question ,i call it "the question of my life" cause i think about it EVERY single day: what really makes me anxious and destroys my joy for life is NOT the tinnitus that i have or have had in the past-what destroys my life is always these same questions,: what will the future bring? could it be ,that one day i wake up and tinnitus is so loud, that it forces me to kill myself (although i would never do that)?could it get so loud,that i will not be able to continue to live? you know,all that worst case-catastrophic-scenarios? but do they EVER REALLY happen in real life?or just in my nightmares,which i really have by the way? i often have nightmares about my ears since i got this.i dream exactly what i did describe here,that it got so worse that i cant take it anymore. i actually dont have any reasons to think like that-i dont even have any ear or hearing damage! and still this human fear -which i know is not rational-really robs all my energy and joy for life.everybody around me says that tinnitus can not get to the point that you cry like a baby day and night for years because you think you become insane. i know that too! my brain knows that, but otherwise i ve been reading that people commited suicide because of tinnitus!! so why did they do this if it can not get that bad? i can live with my tinnitus itself-no problem.-but i can not live with this unanswered question and the constant terror in my head because of THIS question: could IT get so bad and loud that it could destroy my life forever?