Tinnitus After Music Festival

I got tinnitus after attending to music festival three weeks ago. Usually I wear earplugs at concerts and movies but this time I forgot them. Most of the time during the festival I wasn't anywhere near the speakers, I was far away from the stage. But then I had this stupid idea to go near the stage (and the speakers) because my friend was there and there was a band coming to play a bit later that I had waited to see.

Then the gig started and the music was way too loud. The sound felt really uncomfortable in my ears. I decided to leave after listening like two songs and go far away from the stage. My ears still felt uncomfortable and left to search a place where they sell earplugs. But it was too late. I believe that loud noise there was my tinnitus trigger. I have blamed myself for not using earplugs and going near the stage. I had no idea loud noises can trigger tinnitus and how much emotional pain tinnitus can cause. I should have known.

Next morning after the festival I woke up and I could hear my ears ringing. After a week had passed I decided to see ENT specialist and audiologist. ENT specialist didn't prescribe any drugs because he said they usually work just after a couple of days, and it had already been a week since my tinnitus started. He told me about Hyberbaric Oxygen treatment but the treatment not available anywhere near the city I live in and it is really expensive. He said I probably have hyperacusis too. Audiogram was normal, I had small drop in 3000 Hz but the doctor said it probably has nothing to do with that gig and that the gig didn't cause the hearing loss. My doctor said my tinnitus will most likely pass in a few weeks. He said I should avoid loud noises while I have it and I should try to mask it and try to concentrate on other things. (Easier said than done). I have tried to listen sounds that are supposed to mask tinnitus but it hasn't been helping a lot.

Now it's been three weeks since it started but my tinnitus hasn't gone away. And I start to get more and more anxious and hopeless. Will this go away? Why has this not stopped even though the doctor spoke about two to three weeks.

My tinnitus is this high pitch noise, that is sometimes almost like buzzing noise. Sometimes it's like a whistle or jingle bells. Or sometimes like morse code. It's not constant beeeeep, it is more like beep beep beep... a tiny break... beeeeep. I also hear this hissing sound constantly and that high pitch sound on top of it. In the beginning I heard tinnitus in both ears but now it seems like I mostly hear it in my left ear even though sometimes the right ear rings. I don't think the tinnitus has got any better at all. Some moments are a bit better. Some sounds seem to trigger worse tinnitus, and I hear high pitch noise on top of the other sound. The doctor said it's probably something to do with hyperacusis.

I also feel like my left ear has felt somehow weird after that loud noise exposure. Music feels distorted, weird. Maybe I got so bad memories from that loud music and this whole tinnitus thing I haven't been able to enjoy music at all, it just background noise for me now. Maybe I experienced some kind of damage after the loud noise exposure. It's really sad because music is a really important part of my life and also my hobby. I am afraid of loud sounds that may make this even worse.

First week I just cried and cried. I have become unable to function normally and got anxious. I have been diagnosed with PTSD and depression in the past and my symptoms have got worse after tinnitus. My body goes constantly to flight or fight (part of my PTSD) and the tinnitus noise makes it worse. It's been depressing that the symptoms I didn't deal with anymore have come back. My sleep deteriorated but I have learnt to sleep while keeping air conditioner on; that somehow masks the tinnitus noise. Not completely though, when the tinnitus is at its worst I feel like it is almost "screaming" high pitch noise on top of other sounds. I feel like I can't concentrate and I have had to take sick leave. I need silence to be able to concentrate and the tinnitus sound is bothering me, a lot. It's difficult to do something that requires a lot of concentration when hearing "jingle bells" and hissing sound in left ear. The sound makes me frustrated and even annoyed. Emotionally I am in a really dark place I blame myself a lot, why did I go to that stupid gig without earplugs, and potentially in the worst case scenario ruined my life. Some moments are easier when I leave my home and am in a place with more noise but when that awful sound starts in silence, the same desperation starts all over again. I am anxious when I am in silence. I am afraid this gets permanent and destroys my life. I seriously don't have any idea how to cope with this. I can't just get used to that awful noise. I miss silence! I love silence, it is really therapeutic, calming and relaxing for me. I used to sleep in silence with earplugs on. I have always been a bit sensitive to sound, especially when I have got older.

When I was younger I used to go to concerts without earplugs, really rarely though. I also haven't used earplugs in nightclubs. I don't remember my ears ever ringing after going there. I went to a nightclub two times during the summer but didn't notice any ringing in ears after. I have had music as a hobby too and I am wondering do I have to pay a price now because of all of that. I am also wondering could meds that I have been using long term and currently have been tapering off for insomnia have played a part in this. They are benzodiazepines. I don't know. I have read in some cases they have made tinnitus worse. Hopefully the drug and the taper I have had to stop for a while don't make healing from this tinnitus more difficult.

I have started to think I have to try to do as much as I can to help myself to heal from this. I have even thought of the Hyberbaric Oxygen chamber treatment even though I am afraid it will cause more harm than benefit. I decided to come to this forum to learn about tinnitus. I had no idea what this was before I got it...

I am just trying to survive with this, one day at a time and learn ways to cope with it. I know that feeling constantly stressed and anxious and obsessing about this doesn't help me to heal. But how to stop it, I don't know. Living with tinnitus is hard. Hope is what keeps me going. That this will stop and some day this is just an painful memory in the past. I could probably deal with it if the tinnitus would get less intrusive even if it didn't stop completely. After this I will always use earplugs when there is loud noise and I will never again go near the speakers at a concert ever again. I learned my lesson the hard way.

 

Week 3: I have been in a shock phase with tinnitus. I have been blaming myself. I have been dealing with emotions such as sadness, depression, fear and anxiety. I have had difficulties to accept this. I have had a lot of catastrophical thinking patterns "This will not ever stop". "I cant go on like this, if this doesn't stop".

I am going to be open about this and talk about painful emotions this tinnitus can cause.

The years in my life before tinnitus hasn't been easy. I have tried to survive with PTSD that keeps my body stuck in flight or fight mode and handling stress has been difficult for me. I got harmed by meds I was prescribed, and I have done a challenging taper of benzodiazepines that has felt disabling. It's been hell, but things had been getting better. It took a lot of time. It's been difficult sometimes to keep on going and to see hope but I had started to see hope. I had a really long lasting insomnia that had started to heal. I had finally been able to move on with my life, return to do things I loved to do. I have done huge amount of work, gone to therapy. I saw myself as a survivor. Then this one stupid mistake of forgetting earplugs (that I usually wear!) and going too near the stage for few minutes at a music festival caused this. If only had I known what could happen.

I feel lost and I don't know how long I can carry on if things doesn't get any better. I don't know how people can deal with this type of high pitch noise. How can they carry on with their normal life. I can't. I can't concentrate, my quality of life is really poor. It is difficult to accept that after years of struggling and finally making improvements I got this. Is this stealing all I have? Send me back to a situation I was already in, depression and PTSD, make me disabled again? Does it steal my ability to do work that requires a lot of concentration? Even before tinnitus concentration has been a problem of mine. Does this steal my ability to live a normal life in the future? My life has been challenging even before this.

Doctor suggested I keep on doing everyday activities. Okay, yeah it is a good idea but how...

One positive thing is that despite of tinnitus I have been able to sleep somehow. Maybe years of work to cure my insomnia has helped. First week my sleep was completely ruined. I was scared this would trigger the same type of insomnia I had struggled with in the past. But then I put air conditioner on one night, fell asleep and understood I have to mask the tinnitus to be able to sleep. And only louder sound masked it enough in this situation so I could fall asleep. I have tried quieter masking sounds too and try to learn to use them so I don't harm my ears more listening to that loud air conditioner constantly. I wake up multiple times at night thinking I wake up to a nightmare and hear my ears ringing. But I can escape all of this when I am sleeping. Mornings and late evenings when it's quiet are the worst. Even if during the day I have thought I will keep on fighting, during the morning when I hear the tinnitus it feels difficult to maintain the same "I am going to survive from this, I keep on fighting" - attitude. Usually I go through this inner battle every morning inside of my head. It feels like a huge effort to keep on going and do simple everyday tasks in this mood.

I have just been sitting on the sofa a lot. Eating unhealthy food. Trying to find some comfort/escape from something. It has been food and binge watching TV series. This is not the life I want. I haven't wanted to socialize, talk about my tinnitus to anyone except here. Usually I take care of myself, eat healthy and go for a walk, meditate, think about future, make plans, like to be in nature, enjoy socializing. I care about things usually. It's difficult to care about things when feeling like this. I just have wanted to forget the tinnitus as much as possible. I can't live with it, I need to escape it. Mask it. Outside I forget it because it's not quiet, background noise helps to forget it. I sometimes hear it outside too when I listen to it carefully. But then there is the hyperacusis. That makes things even more challenging

I know, I am not doing a lot to help myself to heal. My diet sucks (I know the power of healthy diet; I have been eating healthy for years), I stress about tinnitus 24/7. My mindset is really negative. But I don't know what to do. I don't have coping tools. I don't know how to deal with the noise. I have just tried to survive.

I have had to take a sick leave because emotionally I am not okay. My body is stuck in fight or flight mode most of the time because of this sound. I had learned techniques to cope with it but they don't work because I can't find any peace with this sound in my ear. Immediately when I hear that sound I became anxious, frustrated, scared. It is automatic.

I also struggle with accepting this. Life is so cruel, it has no mercy. Even one mistake such as forgetting earplugs for a moment can change life forever for worse. Many people don't even get tinnitus in the same situation, so it is bad luck too.

Many medical treatments for tinnitus seem to cost a lot of money and there is no certainty that they help. Seeing specialists wasn't cheap either and I don't know if I got any help. I have been thinking and thinking should I go to Hyberbaric Oxygen treatment. It costs a lot. I should travel hundreds of kilometers. It can cause harm too. Ugh. The window when it could most likely have some kind of positive healing effect is coming to an end. Best window already went.

I know stories of two people who I have met who have healed from loud noise induced tinnitus. Other got it while work operating loud machinery without adequate hearing protection and experienced noise trauma. It triggered tinnitus lasting for 1-2 months. That story brings me hope. I have tried to read success stories and watch inspirational YouTube videos but I haven't found a lot of stories where people say they healed from tinnitus caused by loud concerts that caused noise trauma.

 

Hi Sointu, so sorry to hear you are suffering. I Just want to add a note of support and please say do not ruminate on what ifs or regrets. There are thousands and thousands of people who get 'ear damage' (putting these in quotes as I don't exactly know physically what has happened to your hearing) who do not get so stressed out and overwhelmed. What is happening with you in that you are incredibly stressed and this is feeding in to the tinnitus.

Have you tried any body-based practices such as yoga, meditation, swimming, even walking? I know it's hard to be motivated, but try it. Even if you get some distraction for 10, 20, 30 seconds, that shows it is not going to bother you like this forever, you can get peace and to a stage where you can cope and tinnitus does not dominate your life. All the best.

 

Hello Sointu -

I read your two well written posts yesterday. I thought about you’re suffering off and on last night while I was trying to sleep with my newly acquired noise induced tinnitus (five weeks ago). I just want you to know that there’s someone in this world in a similar situation that is thinking about you and hoping that you’re suffering will soon ease. I put a lot of stock in the writings from Micheal Leigh regarding how to become habituated to tinnitus and how to overcome hyperacusis. I can see from his writings and from reading other postings on the forums, that it’s going to take time, patience and doing the best that we can to keep our stress levels low. I, like you, hope that the noise induced tinnitus will eventually reduce to a tolerable and manageable level. Last night was the first night in a while that I’ve gotten a full night’s sleep without the use of a sleeping aid. I downloaded a noise generating app that I read about on another posting called ‘Beltone Calmer’. It was helpful in allowing me to fall asleep. Of course, I would wake up, hear my tinnitus and then have to fall asleep all over again. It’s just going to take time, patience and again, keeping the stress levels down. I know these are easy words to say. These words sound like something you would read on a bumper sticker. But what’s the alternative? Not the S word. You have just got to believe that every day that follows is an opportunity for there to be an improvement to a tinnitus that was noise induced.

Mark

 

Hi Mark,

Thank you for your kind beautiful words and your support. And I am really sorry you struggle with tinnitus too. I hope your tinnitus will get better and you find ways to deal with it. It sounds really promising you have been able to sleep at night without a sleeping aid. Getting enough sleep is important for health, mind and it helps to cope with stress and tinnitus better.

I hope the nightly awakening would start to improve. I have woken up more times than usually and sleep is broken (probably stress induced thing). It always feels difficult to wake up to tinnitus noise which again reminds me of this situation. When I sleep I have been able to spend some time without worrying this. Maybe if habituation to the tinnitus starts to happen, stress levels aren't so high and mind doesn't see tinnitus anymore as much as a threat, there will be less awakenings during the night.

I have been really lost what to do. I have had difficulties to understand how to start dealing with this. The idea of habituation has felt sometimes impossible when the tinnitus is at its loudest.

I have also tried to read others' experiences and tips on how to deal with this. I think one important part of healing would be some sort acceptance. Accepting the situation, accepting the tinnitus and the ability to live with it without immediately reacting to it negatively/feeling anxiety. Thinking about the tinnitus in a more neutral way.
It is difficult when the noise is bothering a lot though.

Yes, I believe habituation and the healing process will take time and patience.

 

Week 4:

I saw another ENT specialist today. Obviously I like to waste my money It feels like it with tinnitus sometimes. This specialist didn't recommend hyberbaric oxygen treatment in my case that I have been thinking of trying. He saw it as a waste of money in my situation. Not enough evidence that it works. He mentioned risks too.

It sucks, because I had started to think the idea of getting that treatment would have brought hope for me.

He thought that hyperarousal and stress could somehow keep tinnitus going and can turn tinnitus chronic.

He spoke more about habituation. Something about neuroplasticity (I have started to read one book about neuroplasticity and tinnitus btw). That I could train my brain to forget it. Or something. I could see a psychologist who knows about tinnitus or something but it would take a few months to be able to get that help. In the city I live in there is not a lot of help for tinnitus sufferers. It feels like it. Not a lot of doctors who know about noise trauma/tinnitus. Three months can be a long time to wait when tinnitus bothers a lot and makes it more chronic.

I think the other specialist I saw before wasn't as cynical about hyberbaric oxygen treatment even though this specialist said about lack of research/evidence.

Specialist I saw today said my drop in 3000 Hz in audiogram could have been caused by that festival but also could have been caused by previous noise exposures. It is a small dip, 25 dB. 20 dB in other ear. Other specialist seemed to think that the drop wasn't caused by that festival and I probably did not experience hearing loss. This specialist seemed to understand there could be some damage even if it didn't show on an audiogram.

This specialist seemed to think that the festival could have triggered some type of harm. But I didn't get clear answer what type of harm. This doctor diagnosed me with tinnitus and hyperacusis, again. I tried to explain about the muffled hearing, distorted sounds, reactive type of tinnitus that I feel especially in my other ear (that was nearer the speaker). I hear hissing and high pitch tinnitus especially in my other ear.

I got more optimistic after talking to a doctor who thought tinnitus could go away and get easier... Even after lasting for a long time.

On the other hand, I feel frustrated. There is no proper help available anytime soon. I don't have a lot of trust that there is proper help available. I feel like there is not a lot of understanding when I try to explain my noise trauma to doctors.

 

Don't blame yourself, even if it was the festival. There are a million things that seem to trigger tinnitus, and as we age the likelihood of experiencing it just goes up.

I'm no expert on the PTSD stuff, but my recommendation is to do whatever you can to relax and release the tension in your body.

There's a very good chance the "ear damage" is largely muscular and not cochlear. My ears were fucked up for almost a year (after enduring a painfully loud indoor metal show) until I discovered a persistent muscular inflammation and swelling all around my head and neck. I started targeting it through massage and have gotten a lot better, not perfect, but better. That whole network of muscles is involved in the sound dampening process, and loud concerts basically overload it. ENT visits are useless, I'd put my money towards a good massage therapist. Tell them what's going on and see if they can do anything for you.

 

Hi Tweedleman,

Thanks.

I really try not to blame myself. It's not easy but I really try to avoid self blame because it does not help at all in this situation. I feel I should have done things differently but it's too late now. I can only do things differently in the future.

Oh no you had bad luck, I can just imagine it has been a challenging year And that's great you have got help from massage! And what you are saying sounds really interesting. About how muscles are involved in sound dampening process. I feel my neck muscles feel tight because this tinnitus and stress this symptom causes makes me them tighten up.

You are right. Basically one important part of PTSD treatment is learning to relax. Trying to calm the constant hyperarousal PTSD triggers. The problem is the person who has PTSD can feel it is more difficult to relax because of triggers and overactive fight or flight response. In my case I had made major improvements with my PTSD but tinnitus seems to be a trigger that my body/mind sees as a threat and now it's like constant hyperarousal again. The doctor I saw yesterday saw this as a problem and saw this as a biggest factor why my tinnitus has continued. Of course it's always easiest to "blame" patient's mental health when patient hasn't healed and doesn't heal.

Somehow I cannot stop thinking about how that loud sound damaged my ear/cochlea when I deal with these distressing symptoms such as reactive type of tinnitus and hyperacusis. I think if my tinnitus wasn't as reactive and there wasn't as much hyperacusis, habituation would be more simple. Yesterday I was again more hopeful thinking about habituation but today my tinnitus has spiked and reactive tinnitus has been at its own level. I have no idea why.

I have been in body based therapy because of PTSD for a long time in the past. I have been restarting it now after tinnitus. I really think one way to learn to manage with tinnitus could be body based practices. My therapist actually does massage too. Somehow getting the attention away from listening to tinnitus to making body based practices (that also calms the CNS) could make a difference with tinnitus. I hope it would. I have been reading this book about tinnitus and neuroplasticity that seems to recommend practices such as body scanning etc.

I haven't tried a lot to improve my wellbeing. I am really planning to do so when I manage to somehow get myself away from this apathy and low mood caused by tinnitus. I am planning to try many things to help me heal from tinnitus. At least it would keep my mind distracted if not help me heal. Deep inside I am a fighter even though I may look now like a depressed coach potato.

 

Hello @Sointu.

How’s it going for you? Today, six weeks ago is when the noise event occurred for me that has giving me tinnitus and hyperacusis. I’m thinking your noise event occurred at about the same time, that’s why I keep you in mind. I’d say my sensitivity to sound has decreased by about 25%. But my tinnitus has remained unchanged. It’s a little depressing. I kick myself and regret continually allowing the noise event to occur. As is the case with everyone else on this forum, the noise event was easily preventable. It just seems so hugely unfair that Life would make you pay such a heavy penalty for such a brief oversight. I think I’ve resigned myself to the long-haul. Hoping, as Michael Leigh indicates, that the tinnitus may decrease with time and that the habituation process will make it easier to live with the sound. It’s still tough however. Those around you don’t know what you’re going through. You can only complain about it so often before you cross the line into what is perceived to be whining by others. Yet the ringing continues on.

How is your tinnitus and hyperacusis coming along? Improvements?

 

Hi @Mark62,

I am sorry to hear your tinnitus has remained unchanged, but like you said it can still get better and the sound decrease. I met an ENT/audiologist this week who have had clients whose tinnitus had gone away or got a lot better even after lasting for a long time. Yes, both of our unfortunate noise events happened almost at the same time. My fifth week of tinnitus just started.

My tinnitus hasn't improved or if it has, only a tiny bit. Or maybe I have learned to deal with it a bit better than in the first weeks but I think it hasn't changed a lot. I mostly hear it in my left ear (that was nearer the speaker at the concert). At first I heard tinnitus in both ears, so maybe that's some progress. My left ear still feels a bit weird, sounds still feel somewhat distorted and can't for example enjoy for example music at all. It hurts because music has been important for me as a hobby too. I still have hyperacusis and reactive type of tinnitus but also this constant high pitch intermittent whistling tinnitus noise on top of the lower hissing noise in my left ear. Hyperacusis is a bit better, like in your case. On the other hand, when I go outside I am still constantly aware of loud sounds and worried that they trigger worse tinnitus or hurt because of hyperacusis. I should return to my everyday duties soon, and I can't avoid loud sounds there and I am afraid this will make my healing more difficult. ENT doctor thought I should avoid loud sounds for months (concerts, movies etc) but also said I should not start to avoid sounds too much, but instead trying to learn to get used to them and get back to my duties. If my tinnitus/hyperacusis gets worse if I go back there, I don't know what to do. I also have no idea how I manage to concentrate with this symptom.

I can't say I still deal with this well even though slowly I have got used to it a bit. I experience this dysphoria, fear, sadness constantly that has come with this tinnitus. It feels so painful to think a couple of better decisions (taking earplugs with me instead of forgetting them/or going to buy them immediately and not going near the stage) would probably have saved me from all of this misery. What is even more difficult to accept is that I'm usually strict using earplugs at concerts. I struggle a lot with acceptance. I feel angry at myself at times. I feel like I took big risks when I went near the stage without hearing protection. I can really relate what you're saying about life being unfair. Chronic long lasting tinnitus is a heavy penalty for one mistake. And yes, I can relate what you are saying about speaking about tinnitus to other people; I feel like people don't understand what I am going through.

I have had a couple of moments when I wake up in the morning and can't hear the tinnitus at all for a moment. Unfortunately those moments don't last long. Also I have fallen asleep without masking noise for a couple of nights and it feels liberating.

 

Week 5: I feel like I have no idea what to do in this situation. I have been thinking about trying to continue studying after sick leave to keep me busy and hopefully it would keep my mind distracted so I would have less time to sit at home and think about tinnitus and how it hasn't stopped. And hopefully it would lift me up from depression this whole situation has caused too. Lately when hyperacusis has got a bit better I have noticed I feel better when I go outside for a walk or grocery shopping where there is noise that masks my tinnitus and also something else to think about. My mood is a bit better when I do stuff, despite of my tinnitus.

The problem is I still have hyperacusis and loud sounds seem to make my tinnitus worse. I probably have developed some kind fear of louder noises because of my tinnitus. I fear my tinnitus gets worse if I go to loud places. Other problem is my studies aren't really quiet and there is going to be loud sound too. There is going to be music courses etc. that are part of my studies. My career choice, let's just say it is not the best if you have hyperacusis/deal with tinnitus.

I met a doctor who basically said I should think about going back to studying. And slowly get used to louder sounds with hyperacusis. Maybe use earplugs at first in some situations if sounds feel too much. This doctor didn't see my studies as an issue even though recommended avoiding loud noises for few months. Otherwise this doctor seemed to think that starting to avoid things/avoidance behaviour because of tinnitus is a bad idea. This doctor didn't see the volume in my studies too high even if I had music courses. But the idea of going to music courses now with this hyperacusis/tinnitus feels a bit scary. Of course I could try to postpone "the louder courses" as much as I can but I can't postpone them for a long time.

I would like to support my healing from tinnitus as best as I can but I don't know if starting my studies in this situation is the best idea, even if the doctor said so.

Tinnitus is making my life complicated. I also still don't know how I can do things that require a lot of concentration with tinnitus but hopefully I will learn.

 

Week 6:

I have understood that tinnitus is just a part of my ear issues. I still struggle because of acoustic trauma. I am experiencing multiple symptoms that started after the loud sound exposure and tinnitus is just one. I deal with sensation of ear pressure/fullness. Especially certain frequencies and certain louder noises trigger this sensation in my left ear. This week I have started to experience a bit pain inside of my left ear when there are any loud noises and I don't mean really loud noises but normal, maybe a bit louder everyday noises. Maybe this is a part of hyperacusis but it worries me how this symptom has got worse. My hyperacusis used to not be like this. I feel like my hearing is a bit different in my left ear, like I don't hear as well and as clearly as in my right ear. I feel like I still don't want to listen to music because it feels like music has changed: how it feels like, how I hear it, especially in my left ear. I deal with sound distortions (I hear whistling noise on top of certain external noises). I feel sad when I listen to music because I notice something has changed in my hearing. After the acoustic trauma and acquiring tinnitus I have lost some kind of emotional connection to music. I believe it can be possible I have some hearing issues caused by the acoustic trauma. Some type of hidden hearing loss that wasn't detected in audiogram that has changed my perception of music. It is really weird I experience most of the symptoms in my left ear.

Music is really important for me, it is my hobby, it has been since I was a kid. Also, music is part of my studies. I am an emotional person and I experience a lot of emotions when I listen to music. It brings memories, it has been huge joy for me, helped me during dark times. Music was also large part of my recovery from PTSD and it helped me to deal with my emotions, relax and calm my anxiety. I have used sounds in meditating helping me concentrate to meditation. Now my world feels chaotic and dark because of ringing in my ears. Tinnitus and my ear symptoms caused by the acoustic trauma have been devastating and scary experience and even the idea of these symptoms being permanent makes me really stressed out. I don't know if the joy of music comes back or is this going to sound like background noise forever. Will it ever sound as rich as before this or is it going to be this flat in the future too with the tinnitus noise making it sound even worse. I don't know if I am able to feel same kind of peace and safety ever again I had managed to experience during my recovery from PTSD when I have these distressing symptoms that affect one of my most important senses - hearing. Now my body is stuck in fight or flight mode again, like I had taken many many steps back in my recovery of PTSD.

My sleep has deteriorated because tinnitus wakes me up and because tinnitus activates the fight or flight response. I have a lot of stress because of the sound and my body sees it as threat.

I am also afraid of the hearing issues I am experiencing at the moment I described above. I just hope I could return back in time and get my life back how it were. But I can't.

I had to write this down. I don't feel great at all. I thought I had made progress processing this but I feel like I am back in square one again. I feel depressed and lost.

 

@Sointu, I’m so sorry you are going through this. All of this trauma and emotional devastation for an innocent mistake in judgment seems like such a disproportionate response from Life. I think all we can hope for is that time will heal us to a quality of life that we can find acceptable.

Sleep for me is the greatest issue. It’s been ‘hit or miss’ with me. Some nights I only need the masking; other nights I need the sleep aids If I can only get to the point where I only need masking, I think I’ll be well on my way to some quality of life.

Take care,
Mark

 

Hi @Mark62,

Thank you for your kind words. It really feels like this was a bit too big price to pay for one little misjudgement. This sure has been traumatic, emotionally devastating experience! Before that unfortunate summer festival I felt happy. I have felt completely lost after it. Last couple of weeks have been really difficult because after seeing some improvement, my symptoms spiked. Emotionally it sent me back to square one even though I had already processed this a lot and had taken steps forward. Spiking of the symptoms has caused a lot of worry and my sleep deteriorated as a result. Before it I had started to make some kind of peace with the situation and tried to just continue doing stuff I usually do.

I really hope we can life that we want in the future. And that time heals.

Hopefully your sleep improves. I sleep using sleeping aid every night that I have been tapering (tiny dose left to taper) for years. I have used Melatonin too to support my taper. Let's just say this situation didn't make the tapering easier because it wrecked my sleep and increased stress levels. I had no issues with insomnia anymore before this happened; I used to have in the past. Weighted blanket has helped a bit with tinnitus related insomnia because it helps to relieve stress that this situation causes. Also Magnesium oil spray helps to relax my muscles that sometimes makes falling back asleep a bit easier if I wake up at night.

 

Week 7:

I feel lost. It is the best word to describe how I feel at the moment.

I tried returning to do everyday stuff, study etc. I felt a bit happier. I did like the ENT suggested, continue living my life normally and get used to sounds again, not use earplugs all the time which he thought is not a great idea with hyperacusis.
He suggested to avoid louder sounds but only mentioned things like movies, concerts but he thought sounds at my studies would not be a problem. Avoiding any type of louder sounds is almost impossible in my studies and there have been situations that are a lot louder than I would have thought. I tried using earplugs in my ears when needed, but not overprotect my ears.

A few days after trying to do stuff, ear pain started. I believe my hyperacusis got worse and it has slowly got even worse. In the beginning of my journey hyperacusis was different. Now I experience PAIN in my ears and I basically feel this piercing, pressure, fullness sensation deep inside of my ears (especially left one) which I would describe as uncomfortable and also, scary. It's not normal to feel pain because of sound and this type of symptom can be disabling. I feel some (low) frequencies particularly uncomfortable. I noticed my tinnitus and sound distortions are getting worse but tinnitus feels like the least of my problems at the moment. Like my ears have started to feel more and more irritated, but my left ear is the worst. This is like a cluster of symptoms that started after loud noise at that festival near the stage. I believe the fact I went near that stage too say hi to my friend and THEN the loud music started made the situation worse for my ears and caused some type of "acoustic shock". I was not there many minutes but my symptoms have felt bad. If I had heard how loud the music was, I had not gone so near the stage. Loud music like that is not even comfortable to listen.

Suddenly these symptoms have got worse and worse. Quieter sounds have started to irritate my ears. I have some type of ear fatigue and sometimes even conversations on the phone increase the pain in my ears if they last for a long time. Music is particularly problematic and I want to avoid lower frequencies. Sometimes I have this electric shock type of pain sensation under my ear and in my neck. I have read about ears and understood the complexity of ears and their functioning, all the nerves, muscles involved etc. Maybe some nerve is irritated?

I have been recommended masking sounds but even white noise seems to irritate my ears and increase sound distortions sometimes. I have no idea what to do in this situation, be in complete silence when sounds cause pain? My intuition "says" to be in silence. Use earplugs constantly? Maybe the advice of ENT wasn't as good as I thought and maybe the ears would have needed more rest. At first I did not use earplugs at all and some normal everyday sounds like walking in the park and dogs barking felt overwhelming with hyperacusis. I probably should have used earplugs in the beginning too.

I must say these symptoms freak me out big time. What is going on in my ears? Is there some kind of damage even though I was told I have no hearing loss (I know an audiogram isn't really reliable to confirm that my ears are completely fine). Multiple questions in my mind but no answers. I have been thinking about seeing some new specialist, again, even though I must say I don't have high expectations I get any type of new information or help that would really help. Finding a specialist who has a lot of expertise in hyperacusis (understand this pain thing) can be challenging.

 

Hi @Sointu.

Thanks for replying to my posts earlier – yes it does look like we are going through a very similar thing. Exactly 2 months for me today, it’s been a pretty full on journey so far and I can sympathize with everything you have said.

I’m feeling pretty frustrated and lost at the moment too – as you read I actually had a ‘good’ weekend last week, I find it hard to quantify on a scale what we experience – rather judge the day by my mood, and I can say that for 3 days I was feeling much better, so much so that I began to really think I was going to be one of the lucky ones that is done with this within the much reported 3 month window.

Fast forward to Tuesday when I managed to suffer another acoustic trauma – an impact wrench in a mechanical workshop, maybe 3 secs tops but super loud. Now I’m stressing again and the tinnitus itself has ramped up considerably. I am not ashamed to say there were some tears yesterday morning – this whole thing is just incredibly hard.

The mind game I am going through at the moment is: did the impact wrench actually cause further damage? Or is my reaction and stress about the noise actually the cause here? I have everything crossed for the latter – I have been is and around workshops more or less my whole working life and wouldn’t have thought twice about this before...

Just generally too I find this whole thing fatiguing and frustrating – as with yourself, I wanted this gone and have tried a few different things and looked for hope wherever I could. This forum, as good as it is, also contradicts just about everything is offers up.

I have found a couple of videos on noise trauma success on YouTube which I will try and link in a below post. There is an App called ‘Quieten’ by Julian Cowan Hill which I have downloaded and watched – I haven’t gone the extra and paid for anything however – and again, if you search feedback on for anything on here you get mixed reviews on whether the help is genuine or not.

After 2 months of tinnitus, and essentially being back where I started – I’m just exhausted with this. I will continue with the few things I am trying (which I will share below) but as for actively trying to fight this thing, I think I am done.

I am currently taking supplements for Ginkgo Biloba, B12 and Magnesium – I am also drinking 2 tablespoons of Apple Cider Vinegar twice daily (this is awful – they say to mix it with water but I find that just makes more of it – I just shot it).

At the end of the day I think the above is just me trying to hold onto some sort of control with this – I am skeptical of all of it, I think time the main factor with everyone – I mean, if I were to do 3 cartwheels in my backyard every night and then drink a cup of soy sauce and eventually get better OVER TIME, of course I’m probably going to tell everyone to get on the cartwheels and soy source right?

I do hold some belief that stress is part of this though – I remember having a decent reduction in my tinnitus the day of my 1st COVID-19 vaccination, I think the stress of this whole pandemic and the risk of actually getting sick subconsciously affects us all more than what we probably give credit for.

Here’s hoping we both see some improvement soon, I’m not sure about yourself but I know at the start I wanted this gone 100% - now after my recent weekend and what I am currently going through, just a reduction will do.

Please let me know how you are going occasionally, and I will do the same.

 

My positive tinnitus story

Federico says he is an amateur musician - but if you look up his band 'Didols' they are semi-pro and looks like they have some pretty big concerts - He doesn't mention in the video, but in the comments he says he only started to forget about his tinnitus from time to time after about 5 months with recovery after the first year.

Lily's Musings - My Tinnitus Story

Lilli is a French Music Producer - she got better in 3 months.

 

Even if your audiograms are good, you probably have hearing loss in terms of lost synapses - cochlear synaptopathy. If it's severe enough, an ABR test may be able to diagnose it, like in my case. My progression is similar to yours - acoustic trauma, some loudness hyperacusis. Subsequent exposure to loud-ish sounds (and I don't mean concerts, I mean just walking down a busy street, going to a restaurant) have made my ears worse and worse. ABR testing did not show neuropathy at first, but it did a month later... Now I too get pain hyperacusis and ear fullness after exposure to moderate sounds.

Music does sound distorted, too, drum plates hiss and crackle if they're part of a song, but are kind of fine on their own. That is classic symptom of synaptopathy where your sound perception is worse in the presence of noise. Thankfully for me it's only high frequencies, so speech in noise is not affected much.

Try to protect your ears as much as you can. My otologist initially also told me to live normally, but avoid loud places like concerts. Well, it turns out I should not have been listening to music at all or playing computer games with sound, even at a low volume through speakers. Now prolonged exposure to just 50-60 dB music through speakers or 30 dB through headphones causes ear fullness at the end of the day.

Best of luck - we are young and this can somewhat improve, but we need to protect our ears. There are treatments on the horizon from Otonomy, Frequency Therapeutics, Pipeline Therapeutics and possibly others. Stem cell treatment is also an option as it has had some success in small clinical trials and in animal models.

 

Do you know if these awful sound distortions can heal? And can the pain and fullness just stop some day?

Obviously resting the ears is important now.

 

I've read that hyperacusis and distortions do go away for some people, but I am skeptical about my own case as I am just getting worse. Just hoping that stem cells can do something, otherwise my life is pretty much over.

 

Hi @aul884.

I really hope you will heal soon. I have talked with a couple people IRL who have had tinnitus for only weeks or months that has resolved and gone away after loud noise exposure. I have also talked with some people who have had it for a day or hours after gigs. One said tinnitus lasted for days and resolved. What is most weird I can't relate with them. I feel like I don't have experience of my ears ringing after some gigs. This is my first time and tinnitus went from 0 to 100 after that gig and it has stayed since. I feel like I haven't got experience of tinnitus either, except some 2 second beeps really rarely that obviously are normal.

I have also watched those inspirational videos a lot. Thank you for sending them. I loved the YouTube video of Lily who talked about her experiences of tinnitus. I found it in the first week of this journey. I also found the YouTube videos of Julian Cowan Hill and watched them.

I have been using this app that allows me to "build" masking sounds. I prefer nature sounds. I did not know Julian had an app too. At the moment I have tried to keep a break from even listening masking sounds because my hyperacusis flared up. This feels like some sort of hard core habituating to tinnitus. Combination of silence and EEEE sound. Horrible. Actually I don't know whether to laugh or cry. (I have cried a lot during this unfortunate journey. I am a sensitive person but definitely not like this normally). Somehow the sound of any kind of speakers, electrical devices is bothering me at the moment and I listen to my intuition and take a break listening to them. It is difficult though because I love to spend time watching TV series and listen to music.

I mostly have felt good when I have been able to distract myself; I don't think about the tinnitus and background noise has masked it. After seeing the ENT I felt so relieved when I was told I did not have hearing loss caused by that concert and felt really happy despite of tinnitus. I was calling to my friends. I felt happy. At the moment I am far away from that optimistic mood.

This whole pandemic has also made my stress worse. When I booked the tickets to that festival, COVID-19 situation was a lot of better. Days before the festival COVID-19 situation got worse in the city I live in and some people were even selling their tickets online they had bought. The whole COVID-19 pandemic has felt really stressful because there is constant news about the situation in media. I was thinking constantly should I go there. I was constantly aware of COVID-19 during that festival and it probably impaired my judgment too when there was constantly that extra worry inside of my head. I went to buy a good mask before the festival etc. But somehow I forgot to protect my ears and forgot earplugs at home.

I believe eating healthy and living healthy can aid in recovery process so I understand why you feel like those supplements support your healing. If they wouldn't heal you (I am not saying they wouldn't), there is also a thing called placebo effect that is powerful. When you feel like you are improving and stay hopeful I believe it can aid in recovery. I have tapered off benzo (that is far away from healthy and has caused harm in the long term) and I have noticed significant amount of help from a healthy diet and understanding when to rest and when to be more physically active. After this situation happened I haven't been as motivated to prepare those healthy meals. I feel like this situation hasn't been in my control at all, like I have even thought does it matter. Can I help my ears to heal with diet etc. This situation really plays with my mind a lot. And it is no wonder it does. Tinnitus sucks.

I have been doing yoga, meditation etc for years and I believe learning to relax and calm down the CNS has improved my sleep, mood, overall well-being and health. I think this would be one way for me to deal with my symptoms. Dealing with stress is important because I know stress can make things even worse. I also have experience when I had less stress for a couple of days (I dunno why); I slept better and my symptoms were a bit better. Before this ear pain started I had days of really poor sleep.

At first I wanted this to go away 100 percent. I still dream about it but don't know if it's possible. I really hope that some day I will come to this thread a success story. Hope is important but first I should probably see some new doctor again so I would be more certain why my symptoms are getting worse.

You can write to me too and update how you are doing, when you like

Sointu

 

I am so sorry about your situation and symptoms. I hope you start to notice improvement in the future or there will be some treatments that helps. How long have you had these symptoms?

I am a bit worried because distortions had got better and then they came back along with ear pain a few days later. I also have a history of med induced hyperacusis in the past but it resolved. Maybe because of it I have been more sensitive to sound than the average person. (There were people without earplugs there and I am pretty sure all of them aren't in a situation like this and I was near the stage for minutes.)

Hyperacusis is connected with PTSD I have had. Also this benzo taper itself can trigger tinnitus and sensory hypersensitivity and sensitivity to sound is a pretty typical withdrawal symptom. Also burning sensations etc are familiar to me during tapering but not in ears! So I feel like I am more screwed than others. I have made a slow taper and it has probably saved me from tinnitus before.

Sointu

 

I'm 3.5 months in, with progressive worsening. Come to think of it, I was taking Valerian root tablets and had previously tapered to 1 tab from 2. Maybe that also contributed to sound sensitivity, but I doubt it.

I will be doing stem cell secretome treatment soon, and if that does not help, I am ordering (or synthesising, but the synthesis is a bit complicated) HPN-07 and taking it with NAC (Hough Ear Institute bomb blast pill).

I think drug induced or withdrawal cases usually heal better. Benzo taper cases usually resolve on their own.

I hope you can recover!

 

I can imagine 3.5 months of these types of symptoms must have been a really stressful experience. On the other hand it is not really a long time so hopefully things will get better. The body doesn't always heal immediately and some things take time, I can definitely say it after experiencing benzo-induced symptoms. The body slowly adapts to new situations and there are things such as neuroplasticity etc. I really hope that the stem cell treatment helps you!

I haven´t got a lot of information about medical treatments for tinnitus or hyperacusis and can imagine they are expensive and probably not available anywhere near. I am newbie with these symptoms and I have just tried to read stuff and learn about acoustic trauma/shock, hyperacusis etc. I wouldn't be surprised if I had some sort of issues with Tensor tympani because I am often experiencing clicking sensation in ear like something is vibrating. I have tried to be in silence and protect myself from loud sounds and slowly get used to them again making slow steps.

I understand why you feel like you want to try medical treatments and improve the situation when it has been like that. I feel frustrated there hasn't been medical help for noise-induced symptoms. I was not prescribed corticosteroids when I went too late to see an ENT, a week later after that gig. He first talked about some client trying HBOT but after my audiogram was normal he did not talk about it anymore and when I asked later, he did not recommend it anymore. Neither did the other ENT.

I got recommendation to try relaxation and TRT.

I have been trying neck massage and acupuncture. Also Magnesium. I have been too unwell to make any lifestyle changes such as try exercising or improve my diet at the moment. Too low mood. I have just tried to survive from day to day finding ways to distract myself so I don't get too depressed and without panicking too much when I think about this too much.

I really hope that the body is "wise" and even despite of the fact our ears haven´t designed for loud modern world, it would repair things as much as possible so they wouldn't cause as much emotional pain.

And if tapering meds can trigger sensitivity to sound, maybe tapering supplements can cause it too after using them every day for long time. Who knows.

I wish I would have managed to finish my benzo taper and not have experienced acoustic trauma in the end of my taper. Benzo-induced hyperacusis resolved in the past but hopefully this situation resolves too.

Have you noticed anything that helps with your symptoms?

 

I did take steroids multiple times (I had an MRI which was my 2nd trauma) and I can't say they helped - it's difficult to judge one's own case because the damage continues for weeks after the trauma. That's why people do clinical trials I did not experience immediate relief like some people do, so I assume my tinnitus is not from inflammation, but from noise-induced damage, which does make sense in my case.

I found that exercise lifts my mood and I sleep better as a result. But I know the feeling of just not wanting to do anything. I used to be into fitness before all this, and now I have to force myself to exercise...

Nothing so far has helped, but I take Valerian root tea for sleep and can actually sleep for 6+ hours now. My hearing has unfortunately been slowly deteriorating, with bigger setbacks caused by my initial trauma and then the MRI.

I hope so, too, animal studies I've read are really promising and we have had a few Tinnitus Talk members who had their tinnitus improve after stem cell treatments. Apparently StemCells21 in Thailand is the clinic to go to, but I am not that adventurous yet - I'll do a safer treatment first with autologous stem cell secretome.

I think the best thing we can do is give our ears some rest. I think sound enrichment using white noise generators is good when you have tinnitus and no/little hearing loss, but in my case any exposure to something like white noise makes me worse.

 

I am so sorry of your setbacks. I feel like many scans, medical exams and even procedures are a bit risky for people who have hyperacusis/tinnitus. My ENT decided to do microsuction a week after my acoustic trauma. I had a lot of earwax in my other ear and I think I should have first tried to remove the wax on my own with some oil or something but the ENT just removed all of the earwax at the same time and it made my ear a bit sensitive. I have read some people have had issues with microsuction who have tinnitus/hyperacusis. Now I know to be more careful.

Well, maybe the streroids wouldn´t have helped me either a lot. I also go through benzo withdrawal like I mentioned and some people have got worse symptoms when using steroids during benzo taper. Steroids can increase anxiety, insomnia etc. And anxiety or insomnia or something on top of these other symptoms wouldn´t be nice.

That is good idea to try that safer treatment at first. And I really hope you get help.

I am lucky I can sleep too, even though sleep is far away from peaceful experience for me at the moment.

I feel like I can´t use sound enrichment at the moment. My ears are somehow so irritated and sensitive. I hope I could use it in the future. I was able to listen to it in the beginning. I don´t know if listening to the noises from the phone speakers was the best idea when there are better machines available. White noise also seems to trigger sound distortions.

 

Benzo withdrawal tinnitus/hyperacusis does go away in most cases, so you should wait it out, maybe some stuff will subside.

Same here, any noise makes my symptoms worse, except barely audible speech/music through speakers. For some people it's the other way around - listening to bad quality music is better than listening to fuller soundstage music through speakers or quality headphones.

Hope it gets better!

 

Week 8:

I wish I would have something positive to write about but...
My symptoms are the worst they have ever been during my journey after the acoustic trauma. I feel like I have fallen into a pit and I can´t get out from there I have no idea will I get out of the pit or does it take years. The uncertainty of this is really playing with my mind.

I have no idea what to do. Should I just stay in quiet with my symptoms or try to live my life more normally despite the painful sensations. To wear earplugs or not to wear earplugs. I am just afraid the pain gets worse. Staying in silence listening to tinnitus is an awful combination and have caused really dark thoughts.

For years I have used earplugs while sleeping and when I saw a doctor he thought of it as a problem, considering hyperacusis. But medicine induced hyperacusis made me start using earplugs at night. I have tried to stop my habit. I am sleeping at night without any masking sounds, I don't know how I do it.

I have a lot of difficulties to handle this situation. I booked one more appointment to a specialist about my new symptoms. It probably doesn't help at all. It feels interesting to hear what the specialist thinks about my hyperacusis getting worse/ my pain symptoms and what should I do.

 

Sointu,

I'm so sorry you're in this position. It looks like you're caught between living your life by either risking the pain of hearing loud sounds and doing additional damage, or secluding yourself in silence and listening to your tinnitus. After reading many the posts on this forum, I don't know what to say anymore to anyone... including to myself. I too have been in some dark places. I'm not ashamed to say that I've been periodically breaking down. This all seems like far too awful a price to pay for some exposure to loud sound.

I don't know what I would have done without the understanding and comfort of my wife. Thankfully, all of my kids are grown, out of the house and on with their careers, so they don't have to see their father at his worst. I'm hoping you too have someone to confide in. For me, it has made the difference between bearable and impossible.

Through all of this, have you been able to continue with your music studies?

For me, today makes it nine weeks since this all began. The good news is that my sensitivity to sound (hyperacusis) has decreased by 3/4 since that day. I can walk around outside, alongside busy streets and by running lawn mowers, without using ear protection. I do carry ear protection with me, however, and I do put it in when I come across the odd leaf blower. Leaf blowers are simply too loud and should be against the law in general! The bad news is that I don't think my tinnitus has decreased much, if any, over these nine weeks. It's still louder in my left ear compared to my right ear. Really, I have just pretty much resigned myself that this is going to take six, nine or twelve months for the tinnitus to resolve itself to being the best that it's going to be. A little hard to accept, but at this point, I think I would happily take a decrease in the loudness of my tinnitus such that it didn't give me a lot of trouble going to sleep.

Well, we both pretty much started this awful journey at about the same time, so I do keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Mark

 

Glad to see you guys supporting each other. 8 and 9 weeks respectively is still very early days. You should see improvement in the coming months. As I’m sure you’ve read on other threads, the first 3 months approx are considered the hardest. Ears unfortunately settle very slowly.