Tips for Habituating to Tinnitus? Do People with Mild-to-Moderate Tinnitus Have Good Lives?

Sorry to bother everyone. I know there's a lot of people here who have it a lot worse than me, but still, I'm going through a difficult moment currently.

I'm now 2.5 months in and like many start to live with the thought of having it for a long time.

My thoughts are: 1-2 years until it goes down or Lenire reduces it, or 5-10 years until we have these new fancy medicines.

My tinnitus is usually a bit above quiet room stage but I hear it through pretty much all the day because it's very high pitched and I work in a quiet office. Things that mask it mostly or completely are grocery stores, loud crickets, medium or heavy rainfall, showers, things like that. It could be worse but that thought only helps me so much. The volume hasn't faded really since onset (perception lowered because anxiety is way down), but my hyperacusis is basically gone and reactivity completely gone. Tone has changed a bit, but don't really think for the better (from a somewhat fragmented hiss/TV static to a constant hiss/TV static). When I'm in a good mood its usually a 2.5/10 (pretty chill), but normally more around 3.5-4/10.

I am unfortunately often in a bad mood lately which ramps up my tinnitus to maybe a 4-5/10. Now my mood is not so much because of my tinnitus but more because I feel like not having much to live for. This was a problem already before tinnitus (and probably contributed to me getting tinnitus, bad mental health and such) but I always managed to push it away...

If I had to sum up my problems:
- Bullied in school and in consequence got too shy to have actual friends until maybe the age of 24 (I was addicted to video games in teenagehood since "there is nothing else to do", great way to not admitting the problem), where I started to make friends (real ones). I got over this problem but it means that I have few really great memories of my childhood/teenagehood I can call upon for motivation.
- I took the somewhat easy route for jobs (no real dreams because no self esteem): I studied law because job opportunities are good, pay is very good. I should have quit because except for penal law there was nothing that truly interested me (but I like my study friends). I just got through it, even with good grades. I did the bar exam, which was very difficult, but getting it for me was just "meh, great", because it didn't really mean anything for me. So to sum up here: I do not have any real success moments in my life I can use for motivation.
- I have a very decent job with great pay and low stress (legal counsel for local state administration). Satisfaction is low because I only get once in a while an interesting problem to solve. Most of the time I'm formulating documents (meh), governing (bah) and optimizing situations (boring). I like solving complex problems. So I know now that I should have studied something in the field of natural sciences. Or become a computer technician maybe. On the other hand my job is close to my home, has great colleagues and I can go for a walk in nature (very rural place) during lunchtime. Perfect situation, except that it's not fulfilling at all.
- Close to 30, never had a girl friend (lack of self esteem because of above reasons or in general not knowing what I want in life). Sorry yes it is important for me as a man.
- Silence was very central to me, but I only start to realise to what extent. Silence for me was when I thought about myself, letting go of past grudges, building my personality step by step (or at least trying to). It was life for me (but also a big way for procrastination...). Having it taken from me gives me like very serious withdrawal symptoms. Plus not having silence exhausts me quite a bit more, and when it happens at work I have difficulty concentrating.

I think if I didn't have the above problems I would handle tinnitus quite well. So I have to get a handle on my job and my relationship situation, but I am unsure if a can do it. I'm frightened to give up my current job for something else because I fear getting in a stressy situation which spikes my tinnitus, or getting a job which then is just as unfulfilling as my current one. With the relationship I wonder if I can do it. But I'm actually less stressed about that one.
I will probably apply for CBT or just get a therapist for some guidance. I probably can't make it alone.

My question is: Even with silence gone, do you guys with mild-moderate tinnitus have good lives? The thought that keeps popping up lately is: "is it worth it?" "does it get better with habituation?" (rationally I say yes, there's still many things I find beautiful, but I lack the energy to push forward; I guess it's obvious that I'm depressed).

Also: Is there anything I can do to habituate more easily?

I still go hiking with friends, I listen less to nature and try more to see (shifting attention). I also started visiting a table games club, seems a very good place to me. Not too loud and I generally forget tinnitus when playing and having fun. Cooking is decent, masks my tinnitus as well. I should go walking more in rain. But still... after a week of work (today I was very unproductive) I feel really down. The last weeks were easy because we had a lot of bank holidays, but now... *sigh*.

I think I just need a good reason to life and some real success moments. I think because I lack that I am so mentally fragile. Doesn't make it easier now that I am in a "low mental resource situation" with which I have to do that.

Any suggestions? Thank you all a lot in advance.

 

The times where my tinnitus has been nearly gone or habituated, I have lived much better, especially in terms of being able to enjoy things that require low sound levels, shows movies, games, countryside

 

HI @Sevv

Please read my post that you might find helpful.

Habituation takes time. Things will get better so try not to worry too much.

Michael


The habituation process.

Habituation is frequently talked about in tinnitus forums and probably comes in at second place to the popular question: when will a cure be found? It seems some people have become quite taken with this word and believe it is the most important thing to strive for when dealing with this condition. Everyone wants to habituate as soon as possible and carry on living their life doing everything that they want to and putting tinnitus firmly behind them.

I can honestly say that I see nothing wrong with that, but wanting something in the speed that we would like it isn’t always achievable, especially with something like tinnitus. A few people that have had tinnitus for a while, have contacted me to discuss just that. They have concerns about the length of time it’s taking to habituate. Similarly, I have heard from those new to this condition that want the habitation process to start as quickly as possible. Both groups tell me they are doing all the right things but it seems patience is giving way to despondency and despair and some are starting to believe habituation might never happen for them.

It is of little comfort to these people when they hear family and friends say, tinnitus is just a minor irritant and something that can easily be ignored. Occasionally, it might be intrusive but this is never more than temporary and they are still able to carry on with their life unperturbed. I often sense the frustration a person is under when they are relaying this to me. Whether I’m talking to them on the telephone, private messenger or answering an email. It is then that I’m often asked: why is it that the habituation process doesn’t seem to be happening for them?

Answering such a question isn’t easy because there is no single answer that I can provide but I will say this. Tinnitus is a common condition that comes in many forms and intensities and no two people experience it the same. It can be very troublesome especially in the early stages of onset, but gradually this gives way and the condition settles down and in time many manage to cope with it when it’s mild or moderate. Sometimes this may involve treatment via a hearing therapist or a person achieves this naturally without being referred to a clinic.

It should be noted that tinnitus can be a complex condition, depending on how loud and intrusive it is for the individual? So what I’ve just outlined won’t apply to everyone. There are other factors that also come into play. A person’s make-up or rather their outlook on life. Whether they are positive or negative thinking can help or delay the habitation process. In addition to this, stress and anxiety are often associated with tinnitus and a person might be taking medication such as an antidepressant to help cope with it. There are a myriad of scenarios that I could relay to you on how tinnitus can affect someone’s quality of life, their well-being and the habituation process. For now I will say this:

When a person habituates to tinnitus it means they are able cope with it but this doesn’t mean they will never hear it. Although some people habituate to a level where the tinnitus is rarely heard or stays at a very low level. Whether the tinnitus is silent for periods of time or remains low, mild, moderate or is occasionally intrusive, it doesn’t really matter, because it all means the same thing. When habituation is reached a person will know, because whatever the level it will not bother you. However, like everything there are exceptions and tinnitus is no different. I believe there are some limitations to habituation. As I have previously said the condition comes in many forms and intensities. Some people have variable tinnitus that can fluctuate from silent, mild, moderate and severe. When it is loud and intrusive (severe) and this level is sustained for long periods it can become very debilitating and a person might have to take medication to cope with it, which is usually supplied by their doctor. This level of sustained intrusiveness shouldn’t be confused with a tinnitus spike, which usually returns to baseline within a short period of time.

I want to say that I believe habituation is achievable for most people with time. In some instances a person might need the professional help of a Hearing Therapist or Audiologist, as there are a variety of treatment options available to help one in the habituation process. One should also try to be realistic. There are some people that will accept nothing less than a complete cure from their tinnitus and this is unfortunate, because they could waste a lot of time being miserable.

I have corresponded with people that have said, their tinnitus is very low and is only heard occasionally or in a quiet room, at night for instance. Yet these people are not satisfied because they want a complete cure and will deliberately seek out quiet surroundings to monitor their tinnitus, checking to see if it has increased or not. It’s as if they have become obsessed with this condition and to the point where is starts to affect their relationship with those that are close to them, and I don’t think this is healthy.

In summing up I want to say one last thing. Those that are having treatment with a Hearing Therapist, Audiologist, or finding that their tinnitus is becoming less intrusive and they are in the habituation process. Try not to read negative posts or associate with negative thinking people who are not in the same place that you are, as their beliefs can prevent your advancement, if you are not careful.

Further reading on habituation:
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/tinnitus-a-personal-view.18668/
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/hyperacusis-as-i-see-it.19174/
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/answers-to-hyperacusis-and-habituation.12058/

 

Thanks a lot. In fact my morning was pretty good, but I exhausted my energy working mindfully until lunch and then had nothing to go. I hope I'll eventually be able to do that until evening. It's already good that I found a way for me to be mindful again (mindful seeing instead of listening, almost as relaxing as hearing because eyes also passively take in information. )

 

Yes. Really depends on the person though. Some people are fighters other people give up. For example the same person may loose their right arm. 1 may get adapt in a year. The other might continue to think back on the situation over and over. It's difficult to change the mindset, which is the only thing we can control as we can't change the tinnitus.

'I think I just need a good reason to life and some real success moments. I think because I lack that I am so mentally fragile. Doesn't make it easier now that I am in a "low mental resource situation" with which I have to do that.s, so people react in all sorts of ways.'

You know the logical answer! Being defeated gives no results and leads to other life issues. It's also the hardest answer.

 

Thanks a lot, very insightful. You made me actually realise that I should go a lot more by the following way: Set reasonable goals, achieve them. Use the success for a slightly higher goal. And not forgetting a reward of course!

 

It all comes down to the person and their mindset and how disciplined they are. Can you still live your life with mild tinnitus, yes. Can you still live it with moderate, yes. can you still live it with severe, yes. As the stages and intensities of the tinnitus get increase, it can be challenging.

I have had to make major adjustments to my life due to severe tinnitus. Only I can help myself, no one else can. Protect your ears, I became how I became due to constant loud exposure. Avoid that and avoid stress as much as you can. Tinnitus is horrible, but you can still live a life with it......

 

Great discussion Sevv. I think number one I'd like to compliment you on being able to articulate exactly what bothers you. Number two, they're all very valid feelings.

To offer another perspective for whatever it's worth, I'm one month in and have felt many of those same feelings. I'm married, love my wife - who has been really helpful during this time, and my job is a bit sporadic, doesn't pay too well, but challenges me - I really enjoyed it before my onset and now it's really difficult as it's noisy. Anyway, lack of gf or lack of being challenged can certainly be challenges, but they would not save you from the same emotions occuring.

I think it's a blessing you have a good paying job, in a relatively quiet environment etc.

You need to use what you have to boost you to the next level of where you want to be.

An easy way perhaps could be to take on a hobby that offers challenge and achievement. I work in auto restoration which started as a hobby. I'm a self taught welder and sheet metal worker. If you take on a project it could be very cathartic for you. Gardening, painting, wood working, etc etc. You could volunteer with habitat for humanity. You meet a lot of people from all walks of life, you sweat and you achieve, and make a real impact on someone's life. You might meet a gf. You could join an ultimate Frisbee team. (I don't play but my sister and her husband love to do that, and in fact met that way).

If you're less hands on and more of a thinker/problem solver, perhaps you could offer legal consulting for other companies. The companies and problems would vary often I'd imagine.

Point being, not having to worry about money is a big leg up.

Also, totally don't be shy to try online dating. My buddy is 32 and hasnt had a steady gf ever, but has taken advantage of online dating and is doing well with that. - he's into flying and wants to be a flight instructor. - which by the way can be a fun hobby.

The beauty of all this is, you can only go up from here. Staying engaged and busy is the best medicine I've encountered yet.

Another thought - get a dog. Mine has been a big help for me. We go on more walks than ever, as being outside helps mask my T as well.

Lots of luck to you.

 

Except if it's severe, it can be debilitating.

You can still have somewhat of a life even if it's severe but it won't be the life you could have had without tinnitus. Millions can't even work anymore due to this condition. Many are just trying to get through each day hoping that something will finally be able to reduce their suffering. You can also still have a life being bed-ridden due to severe Myalgic Encephalomyelitis but is that really living or just surviving?

Edit: Not sure if we should distinguish between "severe", "extremely severe" and "debilitating" tinnitus.

 

People literally feel guilt for not being able to habituate.

I habituated to my tinnitus because it's not loud anymore, but if it did get louder I would totally freak out and wish for death. It is also my opinion that pain from sound is worse then tinnitus.

 

You are correct @Autumnly This is the true description of debilitating tinnitus which is somewhat different from tinnitus that is occasionally intrusive or severe.

Well said.
Michael

 

Autumnly - your post really needed saying.
‘Milds’ and ‘Moderates’ will never understand; they are far too busy patting themselves on the back, for their superior, amazingly heroic, (ignorant) stance.
They actually believe that the difference is their unbelievably powerful stoicism.
It simply does not occur to these
‘severe Tinnitus nay-sayers’ that the truth of the matter is simply
intensity - volume - severity.
No - it’s too important to assume personal heroism.
I’m striking a medal for all the ‘would-be’ heroes.
Hope they appreciate it.......x


As a rider - I will agree that ‘yes’ a life as such is quite possible - but obviously a quite different diminished life, in many respects.
My credentials: I was a ‘mild’ for 24 years,
but now a severe for 5 years.

 

This is precisely the kind of destructive attitude that is harmful on this forum, and I've noted that this is common from you.

I don't care if somebody scraped their knee for the first time and is stressed about it. Build people up. Everyone on this forum is fragile in their condition.

 

I simply describe the difference between mild and severe Tinnitus with accuracy and total honesty.

What I was objecting to was the statement above in this thread:

“It really depends on the person.
Some people are fighters - others give up.”

That statement is offensive.

Whether you can see that or not bothers me not one whisker.

I actually put ‘nobody’ at all down, if you read my words acuateey, other than the self-promoting heroes, that sneer at severity with superior attitudes, rather than understanding.

The truth is neither destructive nor harmful, but you are entitled to your opinion of course.

 

How loud is yours now?

 

@Rb86 Some people maybe having a bad day. But when they are sadistic I select to ignore them. Go to their profile and click on ignore.

 

Can anybody help me with a way to relax? My energy levels were depleted too early today, so I need a way to relax besides sleeping. Masking with nature sounds seems to work (though its not as great as going for an actual walk in heavy rain ). As far as I've read, tinnitus screws with the default mode network in the brain, so it makes relaxing indeed more difficult.

 

brb title says mild to moderate not severe...

 

Severity matters the most. But the title is about mild to moderate. And in my own opinion and experience mild can be coped with well as it's not intrusive hence why it's mild and moderate can be coped with okay but its more difficult. I'm just saying that the wildly different mindsets and psychology we have causes the vast array of reactions to mild to moderate tinnitus. I just used extremes to make a point.

 

The trouble is that our tinnitus intrudes at all times of the day:
- when we’re driving
- when we’re working
- when we’re shopping
- carrying on a conversation, etc.....

When it intrudes it will either:
- make us angry
- make us sad
- make us panicky
- make us desperate, etc.....
All negative emotions being re-enforced all day long, day in and day out.

We need to hear our Tinnitus in an atmosphere of relaxation, comfort, and security.

I do my meditation the first thing every morning.
I have learnt to put myself out.
I still hear my Tinnitus of course
But I do not actively listen to it.
If is just there.
No anger,
No sadness,
No panic,
No desperation.

I am meditating in-spite of Tinnitus, in an atmosphere of relaxation, in a lovely hot bath.
No negative emotions - just comfort.

(With Tinnitus there is really nobody to turn to.
We have to experiment to become our own Tinnitus guru.
We really have to find those things that can work for us, and make us feel even that little bit better.)

Just my thoughts folks.

 

My apologies Jazzer.

 

My dear friend - you are a gentleman and do not owe me an apology.
If anything - I owe you one.
It’s just that when severe sufferers are somehow criticised for giving up the fight I am very well aware that the difference is likely to be that they are struggling with more on their plate.

Even so - my response was OTT bordering on spiteful.
I have not felt very proud of myself all evening.

Best wishes
love you brother,
Dave x
Jazzer

 

Today my T dropped temporary from my normal 10/10 sharp piercing somatic fire alarm to a 6/10 which is still loud. This was though like being in heaven for a few short minutes as this hasn't happen in such a long time.

My physical problems can't be fixed as I have major mouth nerve damage and artery and vein disease of neck and other places which also causes severe pain. I have many degenerative diseases. There are times when my T drops from a 10 to a 9 a few times a day or week and I can sometimes post during those brief times.

 

Depends of course how you see it. Mine is loud enough that I hear it the whole day and is high pitched enough that it's somewhat difficult to mask. But volume otherwise is not that loud and intensity on the lower side.

 

Sorry for the question but:
How did you cope with this for 8 years? I would love to know (sorry, my mood is really low in the moment and I need hope).

 

My first onset was from syringing which caused massive hearing loss and this actually happened in April 2010, not 2011 as listed. It was a 10/10 for four years. I had to retire. I also had severe hyperacusis, but it went away at 1.5 years in a matter of two weeks by listening to surround sound of rain by non headphones. At year four, my tinnitus dropped to a 6-6.5. Some of that was due to ear healing, but not hair cells. I was then able to live a fairly normal life by keeping busy. I used eBay to buy trading cards and built sets. Do projects that involve satisfaction improvement.

Three years ago, I then received somatic high pitched tinnitus from injury and I have severe physical mouth nerve pain. I now live day to day, as my physical pain is very hard to deal with, besides somatic tinnitus. I believe that most with tinnitus have body structure posture problems. With any form of tinnitus, correct body posture should help in many ways. Drinking a full glass of water with one tablet of NAC and magnesium glycinate taken together once a day is the other thing that helps me. I take magnesium three to four more times within 24 hours.

Wishing you well.

 

Thanks a lot for your answer. You're a real hero. I guess I shouldn't give up hope for improvement since I've read that many here have had improvement by month 4 or even later (and in a year there should be Lenire in nearby Germany).

 

Greg Sacramento - your ability to withstand all of this amazes me, as you know my friend.
Also your willingness and ability to research problems to help other members.

You have my admiration. xx

 

I know this thread has got a bit off topic as you were asking for help as you are struggling and not in a good place at the moment, not a debate.

I’m sorry you are having a rough time man, as far as relaxing etc everybody is different, I find exercising on a regular basis (weights, cardio, HIIT workouts) also I walk my doggo a few times a day as well helps me some. If you read and have no trouble concentrating I would do this as well.

Sounds can help as well nature, water, rain etc I’m personally not a fan of white noise as it irritates my ears something stupid.

I also do a breathing exercise a few times a day to help with my anxiety (again this can help me but not all the time)

I sit on a chair with my feet on ground, back straight and feet touching the floor and eyes closed.
I start from my head and feel all the tension then slowly take 5 big breathes which I hold for 5 seconds then release all the tension.
I work from my head, shoulders, back, stomach, knees, legs, feet and finally my toes repeating the above breathes and release the tension.

As far as you mentioning being bullied, not having many friends etc having a affect on you maybe speaking to somebody will help you with these feelings and thoughts you are having. CBT could indeed help you with this as well, it’s not for everybody but hopefully will help with coping strategies etc and in turn will help you cope better with this lovely gift we have.

As you are new (as am I just over 1 and a half years) I would personally protect your hearing and be sensible in loud situations, I would give your ears a chance to rest and you may well be a lucky one were your tinnitus goes or reduces to a low low low low volume.

Stay strong mate, wishing you all the best

 

Thanks again for the answers.
Learned a couple things today.
I've you're depressed you have to act. Worked well. Also if I am exhausted, I do breathing meditation or use self hypnosis for relaxation.
Showers are great, mask my T.
What seems to be important is that I should not think or speak of tinnitus in a negative way because that reinforces negative associations.
If I do and it is a useful thought, it should be formulated positively or atleast neutral. I am also looking after my energy level. Spending energy for reinforcing good mood (with friends, if alone for loving-kindness meditation [wishing myself or others well, or keeping a mindset of "with every step I give the world happiness]).
So in summary I think the problem with T is:
A: An energy problem (exhausting).
B: A problem of bad associations.
C: Withdrawal symptoms from losing silence as a way to relax (must find other ways).

Just my 2 cents.

Ah yeah, I wonder if it's a good idea to go driving on highways. It is a bit loud, and ear plugs don't block the low frequency sounds well... I'm not doing it daily, but certainly weekly. My T is louder for up to 15 minutes after driving (thought might also be because of the ear plugs) then goes down.