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PennyCat
The more I freak out, the worse my T gets (or seems). And then I freak out more. And then it gets worse. I threw up 3 times today from anxiety. I'm worried I won't get thru this this time
PennyCat
I've been crying on and off all day with some severe panic attacks. Woke up in a cold sweat due to anxiety as well. I don't know what to do :( My OCD about my T is killing me
BrOKeN_1
Find an outlet asap. Do something. Anything to distract yourself from obsessing. Otherwise you will only continue to spiral. Try meditation and light masking before sleep. And when you wake get moving immediately. Clean. Walk. Watch cat videos on YouTube. Anything but sitting with destructive thoughts about T. This method helps me. Expect the cat videos.. I'm more of a dog person. Lol. 🙂
delta784
hey varda methylprednisolone Iv damaged my brain how can i live like this im stupid i read that you were right science never created harm free medicine im so dumb should've taken pill version %100 instead of IV i dont know why i did that why everyday im asking this. my quality of life f'ed i have visual snow syndrome terrible tinnitus ear pain because of this poison
Varda
Reading your story you took the methylprednisolone because you had hyperacusis? You had hyperacusis before you had tinnitus?

I wouldn't say you're stupid. Researching this board most people say steroids is a treatment for tinnitus/hearing loss and I don't know anyone besides you that got a worsening from it.
delta784
i used iv not oral im stupid
C
Hi @billie48, yours is the first story I came across that has given me a shred of hope. I can't be away from a specific rain sounds video without my head and ears hurting and vibrating from the shrill. Did you get this type of pain in the beginning? Thank you 🤍
billie48
I had severe hyperacusis that couldn't handle most sounds, including conversations spoken too close to me, feeling ear pains like being drilled. Many people experience hyperacusis or reactive tinnitus and it eventually fade away within a year. I had hyperacusis twice and both times they faded.
SpiralPath
Hey! You perfectly describe the feeling I have. When you can continue your life but it's colorless and joyless. I think I'm not cut out for that too. This is just against all my live principles. It feels like some highly intelligent creature created this condition with all it's sadism and cleverness in order to punish us and see we suffer. This condition is too evilly smart.
S
Sorry to hear you've joined us on this crappy journey... your introduction story remarkably reminds me quite a lot of my life. It doesn't sound like your tinnitus is too horrendous but Yup! I don't intend to reach old age living like this, it may be okay for some but it's not for me. At the moment, I'm just enjoying what time I have left doing everything I still can within my means.
D
I cannot agree more with that statement. Add to the mix ear fullness, spasms, dysacusis etc, and you've got the perfectly evil punishment.
PennyCat
I miss all of my friends from here, you all always encouraged me to keep going when I didn't think I could. I really need that right now. IDK how to do this all over again.
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BrOKeN_1
Wash Rinse Repeat

It's how it goes with this condition. You will manage as before I believe. It can certainly be soul crushing when you feel like your starting from scratch agian. But generally you will manage. And even though it seems rough now. It doesn't usually take as long as the first time around. SPIKES ARE HELL.
PennyCat
@SpiralPath @tpj Thank you both. I'm having a really hard time right now. A bunch of distortions that previously settled/lowered are back with a vengeance, I'm sure due to my anxiety. I just want to get thru this :(
PennyCat
@BrOKeN_1 Thank you :( I guess I didn't really think of this as a spike but it makes sense. All of my spikes have been permanent increases, but this seems like just a falling out of habituation. Although now that my anxiety has been elevated for a while, my tinnitus does seem much worse and seem to be spiking.
PennyCat
I don't understand how I managed to fall out of habituation so randomly and suddenly. Every little sound is freaking me out. I can't stop listening to the orchestra of tones no matter how hard I try ;(
kingsfan
I think even the most subtle increase in tinnitus can cause our nervous systems to go on high alert
PennyCat
@kingsfan Last week my T didn't actually seem any worse, I was just more aware of it. But now it seems much worse, altho my guess is it's because of how anxious I've been. My nervous system is definitely on high alert. I'm having panic attacks left and right
kingsfan
This is highly anecdotal, but were you having other stressors in your life previously that you have now cleared up? Strangely, my tinnitus always seems to be less of a bother when I have another immediate stressor (fire to put out). I do believe I have undiagnosed ADHD though.
S
Getting there. Slowly, but I am starting to feel like my old self again. (Before the nightclub 3 months ago,not before the first accident 6 years ago) Still, my T gets worse when around sounds or I talk out loud. But I actually sing again in the mornings. Haven't done that in months.
weehiru
Now why did I get a noise increase from a comedy show of all things? Frustrating. Taking it as it comes. Hiss hiss hisssssssssssss
S
Oh Goody, my left ear has suddenly joined the party unprompted with the standard high pitched eee to join the cacophony on the right, now I can have hear it above everything tinnitus in stereo and pick which sound I want to be driven mad by.
Mark SATX73
Hello. Just signed in as a new member. Mark 73 in San Antonio Texas - significant super high pitched and relentless tinnitus since 2003, was about 52 years old at the time I noticed and stupidly thought it was a problem with some of my (Technic) music amps until reality hit. Desperate enough to watch the Audizen sales pitch from start to finish. Best to all.
PennyCat
New problem: sudden onset vertigo and nausea. Urgent care says it's benign positional vertigo, which is fairly common. Hoping it subsides and isn't anything more severe
O
I have experienced BBPV. This link will explain the home Epley maneuver. It has helped me.
PennyCat
@OneRingyDingy I don't see a link. I have tried a different maneuver that was suggested to me, but haven't tried the Epley. It seems hard to do but I might give it a go. Thanks for telling me it helped, that's reassuring to hear!
streifzug
"Neural Saturation: The brain's auditory pathways have limits to how intensely they can fire. At some point, neural hyperactivity (the basis of tinnitus) may plateau, meaning tinnitus loudness might not infinitely increase." My only hope.
PennyCat
I just want to be okay. I want to get back to my mostly habituated state, where my T was just a nuisance and not causing me an "oh shit, I'm freaking out" moment every 2 minutes.
PennyCat
My T is making me anxious again and all I can focus on is the sounds in my ears. I thought I'd moved past this
Kain
Had a bad night yesterday and today it's been better, but still has me on edge. It once again reminds me how mentally weak I am when it comes to dealing with spikes and such.
PennyCat
Long time no see everyone. My tinnitus is back to making me extremely anxious because for some reason I'm hyper aware of it again. I'm sure it will pass, I've been thru this before. But I'm really scared
Tom Okay
Sometimes it makes me both cynical and indifferent – and I know it's not good for me and my surroundings. Trying to spare the ones I love from it as much as possible.
AfroSnowman
Same experience. All we can do is the best we can do.
S
I had 5 good days last week. For some reason, today is worse. I didn't even do anything yesterday to aggravate my T. Well, 5 good days in a row is still a major improvement.
BrOKeN_1
T is extremely efficient at checking it. Glad you had some good days tho.
Tom Okay
Today it's like the running motor drone sound and the high-pitch string sounds are competing who can be the loudest. My right ear has been feeling different since the car horn some weeks ago. I'm worried about hearing loss. I don't think the car horn is the reason but maybe the straw that broke the camel's back.
newarrior
You are from Japan ? Which part ? I have been there 2x--4 cities. How is the fireworks as an issue there ? How to protect yourself fireworks ? REgards
S
Habituation is real, life is good again!
Wait... no, my mistake, this is still dreadful, life ruining and daily torture.

Although I have rediscovered drinking & smoking and that they have no effect on my tinnitus whatsoever so bring on a quicker end!
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