The Positivity Thread

Today was the first school day I didn't think about tinnitus during it! I didn't listen to it, I didn't plug my ears to see if it's still there and if tinnitus came in to my mind, it was a pretty neutral thought!

I also ate ice cream that I haven't eaten in two years with my friend and I enjoyed spring weather so much, it was a happy moment for me

 

This is a great thread and why I am in this forum. Tinnitus is new to me and I completely understand the initial panic but I will not let it get in the way of what I enjoy in life as well as continuing to be the best father and husband I can. I wrote this introduced myself to the forum last night and wanted to share. I believe I have some natural feelings and the right attitude to help me continue to move forward. I've been sharing positive vibes with folks that are stuck in the initial shock (I'm still there too!) and will be reading positive threads like this one to continue strong-

Steve


Hi all-
My name is Steve, I'm 38 and was just diagnosed with nose induced tinnitus today. It's been going on for a couple of months and at first I thought it was sinus related. Unfortunately, after going through the motions with my allergist and primary care doctor (who came up empty handed), I arrived at the ENT to confirm what I already knew and what they prepared me for. Noise induced tinnitus. I'm a drummer. Been playing since 5. I've been playing in rock bands and jazz bands my whole life. I like my band to sound good on stage and front of house and I like rockin' out to my music whether on my iPad, car stereo or PA. Of course, I intentionally withheld all of this from the doctors so they wouldn't discount it to noise induced tinnitus- God forbid there is a more serious underlying issue. But the hearing test was the tell all......3K, 4K and 6K frequency suck outs in the left ear and 2K, 3K and 4K suck outs in the right ear. Classic, text book noise induced tinnitus according to the doctor. I didn't even have to tell him.
So, I'm here. I'm good. I had the initial shock set in a coupe of weeks ago. Denial. Refusal. Panic. Fear. Anxiety. Will it go away? Will I go crazy if it doesn't? I feel I am strong enough to heal. My wife and children are with me. I'm ok physically......nothing is wrong. And after discovering and talking to folks close to me (friends, relatives, co-workers) that have lived with this most of their lives, the stress, fear, panic and anxiety has gotten much better..
I'm having no trouble getting through the day. I am able to focus (I can still hear it) and accomplish tasks. No depression. I can sleep at night- once I fall asleep. I'm getting 6-7 hours of sleep so I feel I'm doing good. A little white noise goes a long way. One thing I've noticed- it roars at night time. Not because my surroundings are quieter. I have quiet in my office at work. I know what my tinnitus sounds like in the quietest environment. But for some reason at night, at home, on my couch, it roars which makes it difficult to fall asleep sometimes. And when I wake up in the morning, it's virtually non-existent. That's probably the only major challenge I'm facing now and the only question I have is: Will that get better over time as my brain adjusts? Also, I've been on prednisone for 4 days with 6 more to go to treat a chest cold that flared an asthma attack. I'm also wondering if the side effects of the prednisone are causing increased anxiety, excitement, blood pressure- all of which can increase the level of tinnitus.
Anywho, I will continue to drum and perform. With ear plugs! I welcome any recommendations from any fellow rock stars out there and any advice, thoughts or tips from fellow tinnitus coping folks. I will pay it forward and offer any good positive help from my experiences to any fellow folks trying to cope.
Best to all-
Steve

 

Steve!

Welcome dude! Great post! Stoked to hear you are well adjusted and dealing with your T in a positive manner!! Attitude (and sleep) is everything when coping with T!! You sound like you are doing well on both fronts! Keep it up. With the right attitude, sleep, support, and desire.... you WILL habituate!!

I am 44, with wife and kiddos too. Have been dealing with my T for almost a year and a half. Early on had my dark times and really rough patches, but am happy to say today (even though my T is still trying to get the best of me), I am living a happy productive life. It sounds like you are well on your way as well!!

Keep the good vibes flowing and they will flow back to you!!!

 

Cleanned my car!!!!! Bahah happy bout it!

 

Yesterday, I got up with T blasting away ultra high pitch. The heck with it. Won't let it affect my plan - steelhead fishing. Drove an hour to my favourite steelhead river. I had a late start. Got there at my favourite spot. Oh no, already a guy fishing there and he was cleaning his price catch. Too bad, it could have been my fish. These hatchery raised steelhead was released 2 years ago to migrate to the ocean and now come back as a mighty sport fish, with totally silvery body with tons of fighting energy and they taste yummy. Rated the best among salmonid family by the Japanese. This is a slow year and landing one single fish is considered lucky. So I missed my golden chance. The guy arrived 15 minutes earlier than me. Could have been upset during my pre-tinnitus days for blowing the chance. Not now any more.

Living with T has taught me patience, positivity and counting my blessings. I count my blessing to be able bodied to go fishing, to be in nature, to breathe the freshest air around a scenic settings of a salmon/steelhead river, to hear the sounds of running water and raging rapids, to spot wild life like squirrels, deer and bald eagles on & off and to chat or help out fellow fishermen. Instead of being upset that the guy 'stole' my fish (LOL), I congratulated him for his success, chatted for a while, and even helped him snap a memorable picture of him holding his priced catch. What a day out, fish or no fish. I thank God for being alive and still able to enjoy life to the fullness despite having ultra high pitch loud T.

Oh, did I mention T, the bully blasting away in the morning? The poor bully was yelling at me the whole time to get my attention. The heck with it. I am going to live my life enjoyably and abundantly despite what it will do any day, high or low. Its tyranny over me & my life is over despite it blasting away most morning to remind me it is there. But no more negative reactions will be forth coming. I had my utter horror show with it a few years back. I paid my due. Enough suffering. I learn something better, the positive approach. Positivity and living life abundantly is my new motto. T can go to hell while I am determine to live and enjoy my 'earthly heaven'.

 

so did you catch any fish eventually?

 

Good for you!!! I go trout fishin every year and also get pissed when people arrive before me lol

 

Thanks Jeff! I'm all the way across the country in CT and thanks to you and internet technology, I just got good vibes instantly from California when I needed them most. That's what makes this community special.

One thing I've been keeping in mind- I've been hearing the ringing for a few months now. Same ringing, same volume. When I was treating it as sinus congestion back in January/early February, I was fine. I spent a month trying to clear it myself before I told my doctor- and lived a completely normal life during that time. The anxiety and panic didn't kick in until I was told by my primary care doctor that it may be tinnitus and he referred me to the ENT....and he may not be able to do anything about it. That's when I freaked out! And the 10 day wait for the ENT was horrid! But in those 10 days, I accepted it and coped. Talked to people. Did some research. And was well prepared for my visit and inevitable news.

Bottom line, the noise was there right along and I was fine. No reason for any of that to change based soley on what I've been told. Stay strong folks.

Steve

 

Im drinking wine and writing my thesis thats how the best scientific discoveries are made!

 

I have this too! I didn't know it had a name though.

I'll look into treatment. Thanks Tenna.. it would be nice to get looked at.

 

No, Stina. But I had a great time. I got my 8 hours of vigorously walking/fishing exercise. Steelhead fishing is not like pond fishing. It requires you on the move to hunt down a fish in the river. I have to read the water in front of me, judge where a steelhead may be sitting (like behind a rock in the river, under some slow seam of running water, or behind a log), cast to those spots and if nothing, move. When a stretch of river is covered and fished, you get back to your car and drive to next stretch of river, walk or even bushwhack to the next spot, read the water & cast and repeat the steps the whole day. There is 20+ km of river to cover. Very enjoying fishing but very hard fishing too. Catching a fish is a bonus but you have lots of exercise. LOL. That is why it would be so easy to be upset I missed that rare golden chance and the guy beat me to the spot to have his yummy dinner. But I count my blessing to have a nice day out even without a fish to take home.

 

Hey steve!! Im 23 years old and am also a drummer! And also been playin since i was around 5! Only started protecting my ears about 2 years ago and was doing great until one day my dad plugged in his guitar to a tube amp and remember him sayin "were gonna crank this thing to the max" it was probably 135 db in this tiny room and after 5 mins playing i felt this excrutiating pain in my ears so i stopped for 2 mins.. Then since i had no idea bout T we continued to play for another 30 mins.. And afterwards my ears rang loud for 2 days and i couldnt hear shit! Freaked out panicked.. Then after two days it dropped from extemely loud T to nothing and i now have a quiet hiss to both ears thankgod. But i havent played drums since and i really want to just scared of it getting worse. Wish i had the positivity you do since you continue to play but i guess im just gonna give it a lil more time and get custom earplugs so i feel lil better bout it then ill start playin again. Your T could and most likely will improve as time goes by and if not your reaction to it will be alot better, even though you say your fine with it now thats really awsome and inspiring! Good luck to you!!!!

 

Thanks Grace. I've had a few practice sessions and one recording session over the past three weeks and used ear plugs. It was an adjustment, but oddly, I actually thought the drums sounded better. The noise was filtered and I could really hear the tones of the kit. I'm going to take a big step this weekend and return to my personal practice sessions at home with plugs. I've been procrastinating because of the T and fears of worsening it. But I'm going to join it with ear plugs so I can continue to do something that has been part of who I am for so long! Life goes on and I need that release.

I'm sure you will find your place on the drum kit when you're ready. Thanks for the kind words and sharing. The positive thoughts really make the difference.

Steve

 

Right on Steve!! Howz CT?? Warming up at all? I head it has been a super nasty Winter!! Hope you are thawing out!!

Yeah, I freaked when all the white coats kept telling me "there's nothing we can do for you"!!!

But, like you, I have learned to more or less live wit it, and am moving on with my life!!

Cheers!!

 

Try earplugs with ear defenders over.. Sounds even better and more protecting to your ears

 

Ha! Cheers bro! We are officially thawing.

 

Thanks Grace. I'll check it out.

So that's my next adventure. Ear plugs. Right now I have a supply of foamies that you roll with your fingers, insert and they expand. It's not the permanent solution, but it's protection for now. I harmonize on vocals and need to hear my voice blend with my monitor so it may be a trial and error work in progress.

 

Got my kid's Seattle Seahawks Super Bowl Champion shirt in today...it hurt me quite a bit to have to order it - I'm a diehard, Terrible Towel-waving, gold and black-blood pumping Steelers fan. but to see his smile was worth it,especially on a spike day like today!

 

Rock On Billie!! Love this post. It's no longer 'T-Rex', now it's 'T-Wrecks'

Mark

 

Yesterday had matches with with my two soccer teams (11-12 years old).
We are one of the best teams in our region. Won again both matches and we are on top.
The kids are very happy that I am back - although not 100%.
Afterwards enjoyed my home sauna.

Today we celebrated my 45th birthday. Went out for lunch with friends and enjoyed a long walk afterwards.

My T is still screaming, but I had two good days.
Reading success stories helps me living towards habituation.

 

Hey it's mike again from RI,,,, I have been doing the best I can, however the T has been stressing me and causing me anxiety not sleeping at night. My doctor proscribe celexa to take the edge off hope it works, funny part is I delt with T for a year with no issues now it's bothering me trying to stay strong and positive but it's tough any other suggestions,

 

Hi Mike,
The only advice I can give you is to give the Celexa at least 4 weeks to start working when you are on the right dose. Too many people quit too early, especially because you can get some bad side effects in the beginning but they usually go away.
Good luck,
Kevin

 

getting warmer here...sunny day with blue skies all day today! went and had myself a rack of babyback ribs,fries,and some beer for dinner Sunday night...salt,alcohol,aand sugar be damned! I don't care anymore! if it acts up fine,if not,great! but I'm going to enjoy eating and drinking the things I want to...

 

Had my first bday with t on march 17th. And it was pretty great. Spent the weekend with friends didn't go out to a bar but a bar restaurant wore ear plugs my t was a little bothered but fine the next day. On Monday went to dinner with my family. Had fun. I'm not yet habituated but I'm having more days where I feel normal again. When the t get louder and hits harder I have to fight back harder. We don't really have a choice otherwise our options are pretty limited. Just turned 24 and I'm working to make sure my next one my t gets absolutely no attention from me.

 

Great thread, I love it. Its great to hear positive things like this from people living with tinnitus.

 

Nice one Katriina, its great when you can have a chunk of time without being conscious of the t noise. Just simply getting on with the simple and good things in life. That was a really nice post. All the best to you and everyone. R

 

Mahalo, Claire. I will love to report on the experience of sleeping with the coqui's. Haha. But unfortunately I am not staying where old rural Hawaii with fish ponds and taro (for making poi) fields are. I will be going to Oahu where my daughter stays. It is the most developed island of them all in HI. Perhaps Kauai will fit your description of coqui's, the Garden Isle of HI. Luckily some parts of the North Shore of Oahu will still have some semblance of the 'Blue Hawaii' of Elvis Presley. But the rest of Oahu are all hotels and shops plus modern homes and military bases.

 

Maybe that's where I should go then! If Oahu is mostly developed, and without coqui's, I might sleep well there. The coqui's make such a high pitch noise I think it would interfere with my sleep. Definitely something I'll consider when planning a vacation there in the future. Thanks for the information!

 

@Amelia and @demi I totally get you about the negative comments outweighing the positive sometimes. When I first joined TT I found it incredibly helpful and positive, but when I was having a really bad time a couple of months ago, I had to stop logging in because I just found it too negative. It seems to go in phases. I do appreciate that when people are having a bad time they need to air their feelings and this is a great site for that, in order to receive support - I don't find that sort of post negative and I don't expect people to either be happy all the time or to keep a lid on things as that is not helpful, but I do not like it when people shoot someone's positivity down in flames or make a very negative sweeping statement about Tinnitus Prognoses. Anyway, thanks Demi - this is just the sort of forum we need and somewhere that people can join, confident in the knowledge they won't see anything that will bring them down. x