Habituating

Hi all,

I just wanted to update now with my story in case it helps with any of the new sufferers out there and in case I don't go on this board too much in the future. I got T about six months ago after listening to music too loudly. For several months I wasn't sure I'd be able to go on with my life - I felt like I was being dramatic and people just blinked when I told them I was traumatised by a sound in my head, but it really was doing my head in.

Anyway, I even shifted a fellowship I had form the United States to London, because I knew that there were clinical trials here. But after going in to go through both Autifony and AM101, I was rejected for the first, and decided not to do the latter. Not because I didn't think it would help, but because my T was no longer bad enough to justify the (low) risk profile.

Now it is about 6 months later and I'm basically fine. I still have the noise and know I always will but it doesn't bother me most of the time. A few times a week I will wake up in the middle or the night or in the morning, hear my T, and think 'oh my god it has gotten worse' and start catastrophising. If that happens now I tell myself I'm getting wound up and I either go for a really long run or if I need to I take half a valium. And then the T will die down again (or it won't, but my anxiety will, and they at least for me amount to basically the same thing). I've found that if I just know that if I'm having one of those unbearable nights on T (and everyone here on this forum must know them) that I need to take care of my anxiety, and then the T will take care of itself. Sometimes, if I'm feeling particularly brave (or am out of valium ) I'll force myself to meditate and focus either on the sound of the T or the constriction/anxious feeling in my chest. It is not the most pleasant thing to do, but I think that doing so gradually makes you less susceptible to T. This may not work with people who have more intrusive T than me, and maybe it won't work for me forever, but it works for me now and so I say that in case there are others in the same boat - i really feel that it is true in my case that when i am able to change my response to the T it no longer bothers me.

Thanks too to all the people who I've talked to on here and who have been so supportive as I've been struggling with. Even anyone who so much as liked one of my posts - all of it made a huge difference to me.

if anyone new wants to talk about their T or anything feel free to message me.

 

Thanks for this post!