How Do You Manage the Thought of Tinnitus Being a Lifetime Condition?

Discussion in 'Support' started by Mentos, Mar 20, 2017.

    1. Mentos

      Mentos Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Cracow, Poland
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced, loud rock concert
      Question to all, habituated or not. How do you manage the thought that T is (or may be) a lifetime condition?

      I recently cope pretty well on a daily basis and I think I can call myself habituated: T does not interfere with my daily activities and I do manage to keep my emotional reaction to T under control. The thing that bothers me the most now from psychological perspective is my frequent thought that I will have to live with that till the rest of my life and I will never hear silence again. This thought is basically something that creates anxiety more than the T signal itself.

      How do you manage to push this thought back when it comes and focus on a current day. Is it really possible not to think about it and live "one day at a time" at everyday of our lives?
       
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    2. hopeforme

      hopeforme Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      unknown/ear infection/noise
      I mentioned earlier in a post that I'm just so tired of worrying I'm giving up and just resuming life. I will still protect my ears but I need to get out and socialize.

      Prior to T I always liked having music/tv on all the time anyways. Silence me made me uncomfortable.

      The sounds that mask my T is rainfall/water. The thought of hearing that over a screech everyday does not bother me. I'm thankful to be alive.
       
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    3. LukeYoung
      Fine

      LukeYoung Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Toowoomba, Queensland, Australia
      Tinnitus Since:
      06/16
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      A loud Concert - Noise Exposure
      At first I was contemplating death.

      But as time went on, it faded to the back, and I don't really have issues unless something spikes it.

      Although I do miss TRUE silence.
       
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    4. hans799

      hans799 Member

      Location:
      Europe
      Tinnitus Since:
      Always had it
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Born with it; worsened by headphones (probably) in 01/2017
      I was probably born with T - at least I can clearly remember sitting in my room in my early teens, reading, and listening to the buzzing noise in my ears. I didn't even realize this is not what everyone else hears.

      This means that I probably never "heard" silence.

      So I don't miss it all and I'm not at all worried about having tinnitus long-term - this is how I always lived. I think you'll feel the exact same way after you had some time to get used to T.

      The only thing that does worry me is T getting worse. Developing new sounds, or existing volume becoming much louder. This has happened only once so far (stupid headphone usage) and it seems to be settling back down (after 2 months). However I'm very cautious: no concerts, no earphones, earplug in the cinema, and NAC taken regularly.
       
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    5. sleepy

      sleepy Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loud music and gaming via headphones, earbuds and headset
      Recently got my T. It's frustrating and scary knowing that my T will be long term. I'm still hoping that mine will disappear one day. I had one spike and it made me severely depressed. I couldn't function at work and I couldn't sleep.

      I had a new noise after my spike and that peaked my anxiety. After some encouraging words from someone in this forum I made a complete turn around. I've made peace with this noise.

      As for the one day at a time method, that is what I'm doing. I'm still discovering what triggers my T and it's a learning process. My appetite is slowly returning and I'm trying to get back to my old hobbies. Stressing out and focusing on your T will only heighten the noise.

      Things often get worse before they get better. I've learned sleep is my friend. Although I'm used to sleeping in silence, I feel like I'm slowly adapting to my T. A positive attitude goes a long way. Tinnitustalk has been a great place for support and a place for me to vent. I know some people have T worse than me and I look toward those people for guidance and support. Cheers man! I hope you feel better.
       
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    6. The Red Viper
      Curious

      The Red Viper Member

      Location:
      US
      Tinnitus Since:
      March 15, 2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Current Theory: Neck injury (Tendonitis @ trap/SCM junction)
      After a year of this, I still feel uneasy, but I do find that much of the time I don't even think about it. Still hope for a cure, but I'm not counting on it anytime soon.
       
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    7. Scared111

      Scared111 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      6/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      After 9 months, i still very sad and anxious that I have to live with this. Sleep is still very difficult for me . somehow even if i manage to fall asleep, I ll wake up several times throughout the night. and falling back asleep is hard. i tried natural otc even the sleeping pills only last 5 hours. not sure what else to do .
       
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    8. fishbone
      Shitfaced

      fishbone Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      1990
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      loud noise and very bad sickness
      I don't think about tinnitus at all and mine is most likely louder and more screwed up than yours in both ears.

      Tinnitus is not fun and it sucks. I know that well, but there is nothing that can be done to get rid of the noise. My MOTTO in life is "It Is, What It Is". It's reality and not made up stuff, we accept what we have and live and not constantly complain and fight it. This motto should be adopted by all and it works very well. Just accept, it. Your ears ring and that's it. Don't dwell on the ringing, now there are some things that can help you live with tinnitus, but i haven't in my 30 years found anything that gets rid of it.

      I have tried, so many different things, supplements and some did help me relax ....BUT non got rid of the tinnitus. I know that I will have tinnitus till I meet my maker and that's fine. I still go to parties, and have fun. The stupid ringing in my life, doesn't end my life. It just made me a tougher, better person.

      DON'T dwell on it and let it go, distract yourself and live life. It can be done, it is a choice WE/YOU make.

      I am 100% real and don't sugar coat anything....
       
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    9. Scared111

      Scared111 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      6/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      how do you manage sleep?
       
    10. Elinor
      Spooky

      Elinor Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Norway
      Tinnitus Since:
      2006
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise exposure and barotrauma
      After 10 years you stop having this thought, or it just stops being scary. I've accepted it. I find the thought of a permanent spike much more terrifyng than not hearing silence again. In the end I believe I'd cope with that somehow too.
       
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    11. BLane
      Devilish

      BLane Member

      Location:
      Washington State, USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      07/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I occasionally have this thought too, I usually just accept it as fact and get on with living, once in a while I'll feel sorry for myself for an hour or so and then accept it, lol. Tinnitus seems to have a built in safeguard against this kind of thinking, because it forces me to live in the moment, too keep busier, more active and social versus dwelling on my T and all the possible implications of that which only makes it worse.
       
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    12. Jkph75

      Jkph75 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2/27/16
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I'm afraid of that too. I'm afraid of things getting worse too. I never think of this as being permanent and if I do I quickly check myself. We don't really know that it is permanent or what the future will hold. All we can do is live in the moment and pray for the best.
       
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    13. Kibakiru
      Cloud9

      Kibakiru Member

      Location:
      Scotland
      Tinnitus Since:
      January 28 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I have very loud tinnitus, but I also have both types of tinnitus (Pulsatile and regular; one for each ear). In the beginning, the thought of living with tinnitus for a lifetime was depressing. I'm only 16 and, if life goes to plan and I don't die prematurely, a life time is a little longer than I'd have liked to live with it. But I was one of the few who habituated quickly to their tinnitus (which is odd because I have bad anxiety and have panic attacks that don't take much or anything at all to trigger) and I can honestly say that I don't care whether I live with it or not. Of course, It can still get me down so I let myself feel sorry for myself for an hour, but then I move on. It's like mourning a loved one. You're allowed to feel sad that they're gone (Silence, in this case), but you can't bring them back. You've just got to keep on living. Even if you can't accept it, eventually you get bored and tired of giving a crap about it.

      Also, In some weird and morbid way, tinnitus makes me fear death less. As they say, once you die, you go deaf.
       
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    14. Samir
      Probing

      Samir Manager Staff Benefactor Ambassador Team Tech Team Research Team Awareness

      Location:
      Sweden
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Bewitched ears
      I used to think like that. I don't know what was worse. The thought of having this noise in my head for the rest of my life or the noise itself. Both the noise and this negative thought contributed to my anxiety and I was in a very bad place for a couple of weeks.

      Lately I have started to accept it. It does not bother me as much emotionally, because I don't get as anxious over it. I can still hear it, but it doesn't seem to be as loud as it was, unless I provoke it. My tinnitus seems to be reactive to certain frequencies.

      I guess you can say I have started to habituate. I am still not sure if I am done habituating, since I don't know how far this process can go. But I do not think it will go away for me anytime soon. I realize that now, and I am starting to accept this thought.

      It is frustrating! It is tiring! I do still hear it, and I do have to make adjustments in my life because of this. I don't fool myself by thinking that I am cured. Habituation is not the same as being cured. I don't like this one bit! No one does! Everyone would wish for this to be over with for once, or at least get a one day vacation from it. But the harsh reality is that you can't escape it, it's all in your head. It's all you!

      How do I manage the thought that it may be a life long condition? I don't! Because it's not! I try to stay positive and not to think about it in those terms. It's not over until I say so! I am in control! I refuse to accept that it's a life long condition, but at the same time I don't try to fight it actively and acutely. I have time! I can wait! My life is not over just yet. I am biding my time! Meanwhile, I am grateful for not having a serious disease like cancer.

      I also find great hope in knowing that there are people around the world working on fighting hearing loss at all stages, from prevention to hearing restoration. I realize that tinnitus research is lacking and lagging, but that's mainly because we know so little about it, and I believe it really is a symptom rather than a disease. We need major breakthroughs in other areas of science before we can crack the code of tinnitus. I believe it will happen in my lifetime. Therefore, I do not think it will be a life long condition for me.
       
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    15. Anthony13
      Arsewit

      Anthony13 Member

      Location:
      West London, England
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2002
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      It's an interesting thought, but not one that I tend to dwell on. Even if it does become a lifetime condition for me. I will not let it break me, and I will not fall victim to the fears of 'what if's'.
      I am better than this piece of shit called tinnitus. It does not deserve any place in my thoughts, as it probably is a monster I created for myself in the first place anyway.

      When negative thoughts do rear their ugly head from time to time, I think about something a lot more interesting.

      It tried to steal my life away and failed, and if I am not bothered about it, or it's claws don't grip me like they used to, then no. It will not be a lifetime condition for me.

      Would any of you believe me if I said I can manage to perceive silence even with tinnitus? There is a place in your head you can find where the two states can co-exist simultaneously without interfering with each other...

      Hope you all find comfort
       
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    16. glynis
      Feminine

      glynis Member Benefactor Hall of Fame Ambassador Team Awareness

      Location:
      England, Stoke-on-Trent
      Tinnitus Since:
      2004
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Meniere's Disease
      I try live in the thought of here and now and not worry about the future as it could be a great future even with health issues.
      Bilateral Tinnitus for me will always stay and could lose more hearing due to MD.
      My Sever asthma is here to stay too.
      But I know what makes me happy and just go at my own pace and juggle plans around if I need too !
      Dark days do come but I bounce back and know when I need to rest up.
      Dont give in to anything and fight back....lots of love glynis
       
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    17. Paul10

      Paul10 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Stress
      I don't dwell on it, and honestly don't accept that my current condition is permanent. I'm going through the wars right now, but I've read success stories that kept me going. It's not a lifetime condition, because the condition will change. It might go completely, it might lessen, I'll habituate, something might work for me in all the treatments I've yet to try, but at the end of the day, how you feel today isn't permanent, so in that way, nothing is for life. There are some people here who's stories or quick replies have really kept my head above water at times.
       
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    18. pef

      pef Member

      Location:
      Georgia, USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      3/16/2013
      I just decided I had to accept it. When I first got T I didn't sleep much and I was focusing on the noise. After a few weeks I was tired and worrying about T took too much energy. I said "Screw it, I've got to learn to live with this; if I'm lucky, I'll have 45 years left, and I'm not going to spend my time worrying about T." Got rid of the noise masker and just learned how to sleep in silence again.

      That was four years ago. Tonight my wife and I were sitting on our deck and she thought she heard an early cicada in the stillness. I couldn't tell, if I listed in the silence all I could hear was my T. So I just said "Can't hear it, it's masked by my T." Didn't bother me a bit.
       
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    19. Lex
      Mellow

      Lex Member Benefactor Team Awareness

      Location:
      Southeast Asia
      Tinnitus Since:
      07/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Bad decisions
      I was thinking of making a new thread for this, but my worries have a similar theme to yours so maybe here's the best place to talk about it.

      Earlier today, I looked at four flats at different buildings near my workplace. I felt accomplished because I managed to walk around the city with no problems. I had earplugs on of course, but at least I was out and about. I thought to myself, "Hey, I could still have a life as long as I avoid noisy places."

      On the way back to my office after my viewing visits, I decided to get lunch at one of my favorite Korean restaurants. As soon as I went in, I knew I had to leave. My vibration sensitivities started in December, and my last visit to this restaurant was back in November, so I didn't expect the AC system at the place to be so overwhelming. It felt as if my whole body was being shaken by the vibrations. But of course, no one else inside seemed bothered.

      Outside, I sat down at the al fresco dining area and cried. People probably thought I was crazy, I didn't care.

      Some days, I feel like I'm on top of the whole ear situation and other days, this crushing sense of loss over my healthy hearing envelopes me.

      I think it's a whole lot like grief. Time can make acceptance easier, but there will be moments when you feel the gravity of what you lost, so you just have to let yourself mourn until you feel better again.
       
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    20. Mentos

      Mentos Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Cracow, Poland
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced, loud rock concert
      Thanks guys for all of your insights. I'm 2 years in with mild T, most of a time I already feel habituated (T does not interfere with what I do in life and emotionally I usually manage to control my emotions towards it) but i have my moments when I dwell on it and self-pitty that I'll never hear silence again. Good for me I have a wife who has T for 12 years already, more severe than mine and she does not give it a 2nd thought. She just says there's no silence and that's it, move on with your life and do the best you can in your life considering condition you're in. Wish I could just do the same, I do manage my T but it's like an everyday battle inside my head. The most impact it has on my work, even though I mask with nature sounds I have problems with concetration and creative thinking which were my strenghts in the past and it's a source of irritation and frustration for me.
       
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    21. Ed209

      Ed209 Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      07/2015
      IMG_3020.JPG
       
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    22. Mentos

      Mentos Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Cracow, Poland
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced, loud rock concert
      @Ed209 wise words fit what I'm going through. I'm depressed because of what I lost (silence) and anxious when I think about my future with T. But it's so difficult to push back the thoughts about future with T when T irritates me and occupies my mind almost all the time also at present.
       
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    23. Ed209

      Ed209 Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      07/2015
      That's why I think that proverb beautifully fits our situation. We get depressed about losing silence, and yet we are anxious because we fear it may get worse. Meditation and mindfulness can focus the mind, bringing our attention to the here and now. In fact, taking things day by day, although a cliche, is very good advice. Our mood is often affected because our thoughts wander uncontrollably, and drift into some very negative avenues. Thoughts like "I'll never be the same again", or "it'll only get worse" are the problem. Those thoughts literally change your mood. Positive thoughts, which are hard to generate under the circumstances, will do the opposite. They will calm you down and make you feel happier. Seems too simple to be true, but it really isn't.

      As I said in one of my status's a few days back: Change your thoughts and change your world.
       
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    24. Mentos

      Mentos Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Cracow, Poland
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced, loud rock concert
      Does this mean you are never ever anxious about your tinnitus anymore, or you just fight everyday not letting anxiety winning the day? I myslef have good moments and bad moments about my T, more and more good moments recently and this is since I started to plan my days to be fully productive, for instance I plan a day before that the next I'll be doing: cycleing, motorcycling, reading, making puzzles, go for sushi with my wife, etc. That makes it easier to distract from T and have good fully productive day. It's worse when I just want to be lazy and do nothing, that's when T is the most bothersome. As Shatner says: "Tinnitus thrives on bordom".
       
    25. Ed209

      Ed209 Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      07/2015

      I'm not bothered by my tinnitus anymore. I've completely habituated to it and it has no effect on my emotions. I'm only here to offer support and to show the flip side of having T. A side where you can still live a happy life and not be affected by it.

      I've still got other issues, which I'm working through, so the journey through life is always going to be bumpy. We should look towards everything that's good in our life, because we often forget. Sometimes it's good to write down everything you can think of that's a positive. You'll find that there's usually a long list of things that we no longer appreciate. We start to take things for granted, but it's good to look at these things and be really thankful.

      Tinnitus can be a bump in the road or a mountain to climb. In either case, you can get over them. The mountain just takes more effort, support, and a positive spirit.
       
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    26. Fernando81
      Alone

      Fernando81 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2013
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      anxiety - stress
      I can live with it for the rest of my life and not hearing silence anymore, the only thing i wish and i pray for, is that my T does not get worse.
      God bless you all!
      My best wishes for you
       
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    27. Ed209

      Ed209 Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      07/2015
      Life can kick your ass Lex, and it regularly does. I think most people are fighting hidden battles that we know nothing about, so even the people we perceive as having perfect lives very rarely do.

      We all are tested during our time here. T and H are going to drag you down, but you will find a way out of this. We always do. Give yourself more time to adjust and I'm sure you'll start to pick yourself back up again.
       
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    28. Michael Leigh

      Michael Leigh Member Benefactor Ambassador

      Location:
      Brighton, UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      April /1996
      @Lex
      If I may say so Lex, you are on the right track and also right not to feel bothered when your emotions overwhelm you, as that's the way tinnitus can make us feel. As you progress on the habituation path, earplugs will no longer be unnecessary and in my view quite right too, unless in very noisy places such as night clubs, concerts etc. You will also not be affected by everyday noisy environments.
      Michael
       
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    29. Samir
      Probing

      Samir Manager Staff Benefactor Ambassador Team Tech Team Research Team Awareness

      Location:
      Sweden
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2016
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Bewitched ears
      @Ed209 Beautiful proverb! But I bet Lao Tzu didn't have tinnitus! :D His eyebrows are longer than his beard! :oldman: That's not typical for someone with tinnitus. ;)
       
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    30. Fernando81
      Alone

      Fernando81 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2013
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      anxiety - stress
      In my opinion, it is pretty easy to say " Live, enjoy, laugh, run, fly... and other things related...
      Or, do not feel pitty or anxious, or whatever... live in the present... enjoy the sun...
      But when you are suffering, scared, anxious... things are much harder.
      If ones brain is not working properly because of a lack of certain chemistry level, you just can´t see things the way they are. And suffering takes place.
       
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