Club

Okay so I have a bachlorette party that is this friday and i recently told everyone i am NOT going. Clubs and concerts are a NO for me anymore. Loud bars and restaurants i can handle. But ofcorse where else would a bachlorette party be? A club. Now my friends are trying to persuade me to go saying oh theres places that arent so loud in there.. Well thats BS its a club. And there other reaction is well take earplugs youl be fine... WRONG again. Then i get "well what are you gonna do through your whole life not having fun cause of your ears?" Im so mad right now and i know all of you understand where im coming from but everybody else doesnt. They think its all in my head and more my anxiety.. And yeah my T is at an alltime low and id like to keep it that way forever so im not going to ruin my life over one night that i wont even enjoy cause ill be worrying the whole time. I have the actual wedding itself coming up and ill be happy to get through that! Why dont people understand this though? You people are the only ones that understand god bless you all

 

I hear you... that's aaaaalways the problem. going to clubs is normal to almost everybody, they don't mind the 120 db crazy loudness and most people do not even experience Tinnitus temporarily after leaving a club. So how can they understand what we are going through?! To be honest I wouldn't go, because clubs are just dangerous and even with ear plugs too loud.... why can't they do it in a bar, bars are also loud and fun?
BTW 3 weeks ago I went to my cousins wedding and it was more like a club after the ceremony with a DJ, dancing and really loud music the whole evening, fortunately I was just fine with earplugs, so don't worry about the wedding itself, I don't think it will be too loud

 

That's a tough one. It might be with good earplugs that you're fine. But if your T is low I would heartily sympathize with playing it cool and steering clear.

Since you seem convinced of the right course, I'm going to back you up. Don't go. Better safe than sorry. If your T came from noise, and if I remember it definitely did, it's probably the wise thing. Though it does suck to say no to things. Apparently my brother, a lifelong musician, has had T for a while now, and he still occasionally goes to clubs and shows. I don't know what he does with regard to earplugs or protection.

But when I hear you say your T is at an alltime low, I'm definitely tempted to advise you to abstain. And then just kick some ass at the weddding!

 

I hear what you're saying, it happens to me a lot as well. People will never understand, even if you try to explain a thousand times over. So I just accepted my image as being an antisocial guy who hates to party, have fun and so on.

 

I get you completely; I think you are being really sensible. The only thing that will happen is that you go out, get drunk, listen to music so loud that it could damage your ears and wake up with a funny stomach and bad head the next day. Clubbing has almost no benefits. Okay, you have fun - maybe. But I've found that I have had more fun in the pub where there is no music, playing cards with my friends and laughing our heads off.

Stay strong. Your T is in a good place and even though it is noise-induced I reckon you have a good chance of it going it is so low. Going to a club could damage your ears, and how stupid and angry would you feel if going to a club made them worse?

I don't know whether going to a club would make your ears worse - possibly not, especially with earplugs. BUT you never know. Your ears have suffered from loud noise, I wouldn't risk putting them through it just for a club. The wedding is a different matter; it's not just about the loud music. Besides, I bet at the wedding there will be a place where you can get away from the music at the wedding and talk to people; in a club that would mean going outside and possibly being alone, and I know that when out at night/at the club a wise thing to do is to stick with your friends, which could put you in danger.

You are absolutely right: do not go. What are you really missing out on? Even before T I was not much of a fan of clubs: drinking alcohol which tasted gross, wearing a dress that I was freezing in, feet sore, and feeling ill the next day. Nah. I would rather watch a movie with a few friends. If your friends pester you, show them this thread. You are being very wise. As someone said before, better safe than sorry.

 

I totally understand you Grace. I'm at that stage where I am very cautious with my ears and going to a club is not an option of me. Its just not worth the trouble after. I'm planning in purchasing custom fitted musician ear plugs soon, I don't know if they will do the job for me but i'll give it a try. Until then, no clubs for me.

 

Exactly! Thanks for understanding me! I did the whole club phase when i turned 21 and was mostly forced cause
Im not a dancer so id be standing in the corner getting drunk hurting my ears without even knowing it. In my case T was caused by overly loud drums and guitar BUT clubs are deffinally a top cause too for some. My bf completely understands also and id rather stick to my drinking and having fun with music at home not so loud and just doing funn things like you said. I dont need to go to a club to get drunk! And yes the wedding reception will have a dj so i
Imagine it will be loud but ofcorse i will have plugs and can go outside to take smoke breaks whenever as will everyone. So wedding ill risk it cause its an important day.. But not a club nooo way... Not gonna be stuck with booming bass music that yeah im sure theres a chance id be okay but am not risking it. When you tell people about having T like my family they say oh stop worrying itl get better as you get older! But NOOOO it doesnt as you age your hearing gets less and less which means T gets louder. Ofcorse habuitation means it gets better but i dont need to habuitate cause i cant hear my T fully unless dead silent, so i wanna keep it that way!

 

Yeah i gotta get customs also, even with them im not gonna risk clubs but will feel better just goin out to a loud bar cause im having trouble finding earplugs that either fit and the ones that fit that are not foam, arent enough protection. Companies need to start making better plugs with higher protection that arent foam.

 

Yeah clubs arent my thing in general, but my sis loves loud music nothings loud enough for her anywhere so i figured duhh a club lol but yup not goin.. Feel bad its my sis and all but i cant help i have this condition now and others dont understand cause its invisible. Almost wish one of them had it so theyd change there tune on things. But yeah ill take a gamble at the wedding.. If my ears were to get worse then at least i can say that it was something i couldnt not go to so be it. But not a club.. I have a choice. And i cant believe my ears are doin soo good, as i type this my sister is blaring her
Guitar.. No one respects me but i guess thats anywhere.. The worlds too noisy.

 

Speaking from experience I wouldnt go.When I first got T it actually disappeared which was great .It was St.Patricks day which as youd imagine is a big day in Ireland and I was drinking with my friends and they all decided to go to a club.I was really reluctant to go but didnt want to be left out.So being sensible I brought ear plugs and stayed away from the music for nearly the whole night.When we left I had a temporary threshold shift which worried me because I thought I had been protected the whole night which obviously I wasnt.The next day my head hummed for like the whole day which eventually disappeared but the ringing remained.I was devastated thinking T had disappeared only for it to return.So I honestly wouldnt go.

 

Only you can keep T at bay.

 

I'm totally with you on this Grace, and I wouldn't go either if I were you (other than the fact that I'm a guy).

Your friends don't understand how detrimental T is because they haven't experienced it. But they had actually experienced what you've gone through to get to where you are now, they wouldn't even think about inviting you for this. And it is not even close to worth possibly having a lifetime of misery with T that is even worse just for one night of fun. And how much fun would it be if you were paranoid the whole time about T?

I think you're doing the right thing. Your friends will eventually get over the fact that you opted not to go (and for a good reason) but if you aggravate your T it could be permanent. It's just simply not worth the risk.

 

Yeah thanku for agreeing! Decision made=not going. And dont feel bad about it cause im doing myself a
Favor in the long run. Ive been around louder envirements since having T.. But not loud as a club so i know my comfort zone. Im fine keeping to my weekend drinking parties with music i can be incontrol of and have much more fun with!

 

Yup and i will keep this thing
At bay the most im able too and that means no clubs and concerts. Ive only ever been to one concert when i was 13 so its not like thats a life changing event id miss or anything, and clubs are just gross to begin with!

 

Grace, you're one of the smart ones. There are no testing grounds for T. If you go over the line you may not come back. I went over the line decades ago but I was just a stupid kid and didn't know anything about tinnitus. Ya, my ears always rang like crazy after loud music and they always went back to normal, then. Nobody told me the ringing would 'stick.'

 

Yeah im not gonna go over the line. Id rather my T get worse for no reason rather then it being a reason i was able to prevent. I never thought T was able to become permanent either. I dont think alot of people know :-/

 

Poor you @Grace. If anything, it is going to help in the future. There will be many situations in life where you can stand up for yourself so think of it as a practice. Also, if you get tired of explaining that you can't do things because of your ears, bring up other excuses. I remember you saying that you work and go to school so just say that you have a lot of homework or that you are tired and want to sleep. Also, you can still have fun by going for walks and to the theatre and museums and more quiet bars i went to a bar with my friend last week, it was quite quiet and I wore 30 db plugs. Nothing happened, so you just have to pick reasonably loud places. Clubs are of course not it.
Also, many of my friends have never went to clubs or bars because they dont like it, so I dont understand why people would think its the only way to have fun.

 

@Grace Besides, maybe your T will be the kind that eventually goes away if in a year or so. So that's doubly a good reason to not do anything foolish. You're doing the right thing!

 

Pretty much what this lesson teaches us is we have to watch out for our own best interests. No one else will, especially if they don't have t.

I don't know what, if anything, I did to acquire t. And that in itself is enough to drive me insane sometimes. Maybe it was a virus. But I'd go crazy if I knew the exact reason and it was my own fault.

I hope you're habituating well, Grace.

 

Yeah i wouldnt mind if it went away, its
Not bad to the point where it overly annoys me so if i can keep it at this level for as long as i can then id be happy.. And if it decides to go altogether then great too! Still wouldnt do a club tho ha

 

Good call. You're doing the right thing. Don't give into peer pressure. Show your friends this thread if they pester you some more, though to be honest they probably wouldn't take any notice. But who knows - maybe it would convince one or two of them to think twice and wear plugs.

 

Yeah i did it just goes in one ear out the other with them, or pretty much anyone in general. But yup i dont do peer pressure

 

I'm confused with these musician ear plugs. Will they make you safe going to a club or are they as effective as foam ones?

 

^ the difference is that with good quality musician ear plugs you hear better than with foam ones. It's easier to understand people speak and you can enjoy music better. Both reduce volume.

 

There just customized plugs to fit your ear correctly so you dont have to worry about them falling out. Your never guarenteed to be safewise even with those on. I believe the foam ones block out most frequencies making everything muffled, where the muscian custom ear plugs allow highs and lows to come through but they lower the volume also to where its "safe" but if you have T your never gonna be completely safe theres always a chance even wearing them that it could worrsen, goes with anything though. BUT if you are gonna go clubbing definally get some but still take precaution!

 

You can be safe with musician earplugs but there is also a risk that you're not. they just let the music sound better than foam plugs so they are good for festivals, concerts and clubs but they don't give you a lot of protection ( most times the foam ones give you more). The problem with clubs is the extreme loudness even with ear plugs and most of all the bass. There is basically no protection against bass so with already damaged ears like we have a club isn't even safe with musician plugs. At least we can't rely a 100% on being safe with them.

 

Honestly theres tons of things we
Can enjoy quieter then a club. Those are just death traps to us. I was at a bar lastnight and it had music goin on but the music wasnt what was making the place loud it was all the people talking loud lol but anyways the most ironic
Thing was behind me and my family were a big group of elderly deaf people are they were all talking in sign language the whole night and one randomly came up to me and asked
Me to take a picture of all of them lol just thought it was cute all of them drinking and having a good time. Hope none if them had T!!

 

@I who love music sorry for the question but i see you have T from the seventies . You are a Hero man. Haow bad or loud was it?

cheers

 

Howdy.
Oh, it's bad. But it's been MUCH worse.
Yup, I'm 55 and I love music. But not loud music.
Tinnitus is cumulative. When it seems to settle down, it'll pick right up where it left off if you get around real loud music.
I LOVE music, but not loud music.
Tinnitus is my life... well not really. But you bet I protect my ears !!!!!

 

Even wearing earplugs while in a loud environment for an extended time is
Dangerous.