How Do You Find Forgiveness When Your Tinnitus Was Caused by Another Person/Source?

Don’t. They would swiftly realise their horrible error after only a few nights of this hell. Never feel pathetic for struggling with this. It’s truly awful.

 

That’s one of the things that I find most difficult about tinnitus though. Some people seem to have it reasonably loudly and just don’t struggle much with it. My father’s tinnitus is audible over everything and v high pitched like mine is right now But it doesn’t seem to bother him very much. It just drives me crazy wondering why.

 

Yeah I can’t get my head around that. This to me is as bad as it gets. How can James Ivor jones and your Dad be so different? One literally leaps off a cliff after 12 weeks finding the suffering so unbearable and the other isn’t bothered. It makes zero sense. Although to most people the formers reaction is relatable when you explain what we hear constantly. Maybe your Dad is actually the exception rather than the norm??

 

Who is/was he?

 

Boat captain who made headlines when he dived in to a quarry after a doctor told him to ‘ignore it and get on with his life.’ The media got hold of it and his family campaigned a bit. Apparently he was a very happy guy before he got hit. Zero depression.

 

Some people are able to work while music is playing in the background. Others can't. Some people put up wind chimes in their backyard. Others can't sleep when they are constantly hearing the sounds of wind chimes.

 

Shit. That’s very very sad/scary. The medical profession really need to wisen up and be careful with their words.... kid gloves! Can’t blame him. RIP

 

Yes and I keep hoping the different reaction is down to an inbuilt sound sensitivity thing rather than being a wimp. I have discussed with a few others on here before that they also disliked background music or noise when they’re trying to sleep before they got this. My father is a little bit prone to stress in the way that I always was so I would’ve thought he would react to something like this but he doesn’t.

 

This is my case. I think it has to do with our "type" of the nervous system.

There's also
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sensory_processing_sensitivity

 

Just read about it. How tragic and frightening that this is our reality. God help us all...

 

@Vicki14 you know my story only too well and it's very similar to yours but for the benefit of others here goes...

In April 2016 I had wax removed in both my ears by an ENT specialist using microsuction. I didn't know what microsuction was, and no other wax removal method was offered to me. During the procedure there was extended periods of very high pitched whistling, which I now know to be called "clarinetting". It happens when the suction tool is blocked by either wax or dry skin. I didn't know that this sound should not have been happening, I wasn't informed about any dangers. This caused a not negligible permanent threshold shift in my hearing over several frequencies. I now have hearing loss (essentialy high frequency) high pitched and very loud tinnitus, ear/face/neck pain and hyperacusis. Before the microsuction I had perfectly normal hearing, no tinnitus, no hyperacusis etc. My life has been ruined by this procedure.

I was not made aware of the dangers of this procedure by the ENT who carried out the microsuction. He didn't explain anything, didn't say how it should sound, that there shouldn't be any loud, high pitched suction noise etc. He just went ahead and did it.

I complained to the medical authority and basically I've been branded "psychologically unstable" by this doctor who is trying his best to make himself look like the victim and me the perpetrator. He claims that there's absolutely no side effects possible from microsuction, and that any hearing damage has nothing to do with his (careless) procedure.

I suffer constantly with extreme tinnitus, hyperacusis and pain. I have hearing loss which I'm sure is getting worse with every noise exposure (mri, LDL test etc), and tinnitus that is forever increasing too. I cannot forgive this doctor, and his deceit makes me feel physically sick every single day. The injustice of it all is eating away at me. This doctor has not only ruined my hearing but he has ruined my health in general, my life, my family, my relationship...

Like you @Vicki14 I just don't know how or if I'll ever be able to move on from this.

 

This thread is heartbreaking...

 

I don't think medical practitioners believe loud sounds are dangerous. They must think sound is just some invisible, abstract, metaphysical idea that doesn't exist, and therefore it does no harm.

 

I've thought about giving up my job more often than not actually but I know if I lose that; I will have lost pretty much everything. As hard as it is.. it's one of the few things that keep me going. I know if I quit I will just waste away. As hard as it is, we all deserve to continue going something we enjoy. It's really the only peace we will ever get. It's nearly impossible to get up amd go to work at times, but I have moments, sometimes minutes when I don't think about my ear. I hope you're able to work though it and figure out what's going to work out best for you. My only hope is someday we'll all be free from this.

 

I know more than most what it's like to be injured by someone else. I was in a very dark place for a long time. In my opinion it makes it harder to accept the condition and start making improvements when someone else causes it. You don't have to forgive completely, but it's going to be hard to ignore your tinnitus and think about something else if you are holding on to anger for them causing your condition.

 

I never for a moment feel like a wimp. -- I think the reason I have such a hard time with my own tinnitus/hyperacusis is one that has a bit of a metaphysical twist to it. I read many years ago, that one of the functions of the physical body is to protect our true selves (Soul) from the "harsh vibrations of the physical world". I think my physical body has lost much of its ability to provide that protection.

I think the main reason for that is I had a serious head injury/whiplash as a teenager. It was a time when I started developing a hyper-sensitivity to my environment, and began having to deal with all kinds of manifestions of sensory processing disorder, which now includes my reaction(s) to tinnitus. The vibrations tinnitus creates in my body--and which meander haphazardly around various areas--are often as difficult to deal with as the screeching itself. They (at times) cause an inner trembling that often leaves me wondering how much more I can endure.

 

Until it happens to them!

 

Almost always it is someone else's fault. Whenever I heard music in my home I did it at low volume. I never heard loud music or played the guitar at high volume. The problem was the concerts, where the volume level was handled by some "technician".

Doctors can be negligent. It was a prestigious ENT that told me that going with plugs to concerts was safe, even for people with tinnitus. Knowing me, if I had given a more accurate advice, I would never have gone to that show.

And do not feel so bad. My tinnitus had almost disappeared and after years I made it return more serious than ever.

 

@Staceyyy

I feel exactly the same. I absolutely don’t want to quit but it’s only the threats of my tinnitus being made worse as it has recently that would make me leave. I’d be absolutely furious/gutted if this was another ‘nail in the coffin’ all in the name of this screwed up condition. I’m glad you’re able to keep working and hang in there! X

 

Massive hugs my friend, we’ll drown our sorrows later... xxx

 

Bad luck, hope it almost disappears again. There's a user on here for whom it faded once and is fading again. How long had you had the tinnitus for by the time it had almost disappeared?

 

It lasted more than 2 years (26 months or so). Now I've been 14 months and counting ...

Maybe that user is me? Sometimes I have several good days in a row. Unfortunately, it does not seem to be a consistent improvement.

 

No it's @jjflyman. Did your old tinnitus gradually fade over those 26 months?

 

What happened?

 

Gene simmons concert with shitty ear plugs. https://www.earpeace.eu/

I am sure you remember my post "I ruined my recovery". It was 1 year ago.

 

No. It was sudden. One day I woke up and only left my baseline tinnitus (is really mild).

 

Yes,it was me.

My first tinnitus & hyperacusis (13 years ago) was horrible screaming loud. I never thought it would fade, but after about 2 years, it had faded to zero. No noise at all, just like it never happened.

This recent tinnitus & hyperacusis from an outdoor concert (2 ladies screamed very loud and long about 10 feet from me) has been about 27 months and has faded 90%+. I can only really hear it now in quiet rooms, and it is manageable (I am very thankful)
It continues to fade but very slowly. I have read stories of peoples acoustic trauma tinnitus slowly fading and continuing to fade even after 3 years.

 

Everyone of us is different, we were made different. Some have higher tolerance for noises, some have healthy ears, some don't. NEVER ever feel ashamed, about yourself or your circumstances. Keep your head up, protect your ears and do your best to make this life a special one, for yourself and for those that you care about

Pay no attention to those that have no clue, what shoes or hell your walk through every day of your life. They do not count, they do not matter, YOU matter and that's all that matters!!!

 

Bit tough when as a human being you want to be understood and feel connected to people and have empathy and love in your life no?!!

 

My brother it's a two way street, ALWAYS! You rub my back, I rub yours. You show respect, you get respect. Our world is very different from the old school/traditional world that our folks use to live in....