Tryn2BHopeful
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  • Low hum or high pitch... Mr. T just cant decide how to torture me today. Maybe both...
    Tryn2BHopeful
    I should look at the positives here... small victories right... T Volume is shitty today but maybe it will get better tomorrow.
    I was able to go to both my kids football games this weekend.
    I was able to listen to the radio in the car on low volume.
    I am still employed.
    I still have my family. I wish they would listen, but hey small victories.
    I haven't driven off a bridge.
    Tryn2BHopeful
    Mo8409
    Lots of positives. It could be so much worse even though it's hard to imagine.
    I told Mr. T today I am going to live my life with or without him. He isn't going to make it easy!
    Mo8409
    Mr. T can kick rocks! Life goes on and T wants the spotlight.
    @Tryn2BHopeful hello - Hope you are better. I am already tapering off of Mirt. I was feeling better but worried about potential negative side effects, It can really take me out of a bind. Was not sleeping 3 days.I know it's not something you should use on a as needed bases. Might you know how bad it is to use as an occasional sleep aid?
    4Grace
    I took 3 mg and no sleep!
    kingsfan
    @4Grace I should have mentioned that bc it binds to H1 receptors, you can still have some non-tinnitus related withdrawal symptoms if you take it long enough. Mainly itchy skin. So be aware of that.
    4Grace
    @kingsfan thank you for taking the time. I feel like I need something to get me through some times. The Med helps me a lot. My personality fights me being on a med.
    How do you find any good help for this condition? Are audiologist the wrong way to go? I feel like I have been dismissed everywhere.
    4Grace
    I believe T, at least in my case, may have melted away the original worries because most of my other personal problems are meaningless when compared to T. Does not mean that the other issues went away. What makes it frustrating is that the nature of it makes it seem like such a small problem. Just mind over matter. Obviously it's a bit more complicated but I really do think you can do it. It will just take some time.
    kingsfan
    Depends what you are looking for... therapy, maskers, or benzos? Those are pretty much the only options.
    Tryn2BHopeful
    @kingsfan Not sure of what I was looking for, guidance I guess. All I got was deal with it from so called Tinnitus specialist. I don't even know what would help in my case. I try "sound therapy" which consist of me playing sound on my cell phone and it just seems to aggravate the situation more.
    @Tryn2BHopeful I am just having a few moments of happy. Thank you once again for reaching out when I kept repeating myself. :) not saying the negativity is all over… lol just saying for that for the moment it is… I thought why not share some sunshine with a friend. :) have a great night.
    Tryn2BHopeful
    Its all good. I am glad you are finding some "moments of happy" Take them for all they are worth!
    @Tryn2BHopeful - maybe it's the med talking but i am sorry for all the negativity I sent your way :) maybe I am having a brief moment of clarity so am sending a few messages while it lasts - lol. I am realizing now that I often came here when I was in a massive panic.
    Tired. Just Tired.
    4Grace
    @Tryn2BHopeful - you are an incredible human being. Honest. I know you will be okay. Tomorrow is a new day. With everything you have going on you always take the time to reach out to others. You have so many positive posts. You recently came off a low dose of Mirtazapine. Maybe that could be making things a little worse for now but it will pass. Thinking of you and hope you feel better soon.
    Ngo13
    Same. But we got to keep holding onto hope for better days ahead. You never know!
    W
    yeah. Today was my day. Take it easy. *bro-hug*
    Interesting that the audiologist suggested white noise. I would have thought that was more important for tinnitus caused by acoustic trauma. Did the audiologist mention anything significant regarding the fact that your cause was medication?
    4Grace
    I think going to all the different doctors gives us hope and something to look forward to. Makes us feel, at the very least, that we are being proactive in attempting to find anything that may help. Even if just a better understanding of our specific condition. Same garbage place after place is correct. We have to keep trying until we make peace with this beast.
    Tryn2BHopeful
    its a one size fits all approach...
    4Grace
    Or more like a one size fits none :)
    When do I wake up from this!?!.....
    Marina Moon
    Literally me every single day. Hang in there!
    4Grace
    So many times I hoped this was nothing but a bad nightmare. You are so very kind and really do live up to your user name. You always sound hopeful. I truly think you can beat this based on all your posts. Today you may feel tired, but that's just today. As you mentioned everyone of us is on our joinery.
    Another audiologist appointment today... Hopefully this one goes better than the last.
    kingsfan
    jimvee
    That sounds disappointing. Was there any specific treatment that you were hoping to get? And do you have other major appointments in the coming times?
    Tryn2BHopeful
    @jimvee I honestly dont know what I was expecting, a game plan, an idea of how to manage this monster in my head. TRT? CBT? Some confirmation on if I have damaged the actual auditory system since this seems to be med induced.
    Somedays I still wake up in disbelief as to what has happened. I need to say goodbye to what was, and try to live with what is.
    Tryn2BHopeful
    Juliane
    I do this every day. It's like living in a dream or involuntarily being a character in a David Lynch movie. Or a parallel universe. I guess we all are still traumatized and in shock by all this.
    Tryn2BHopeful
    @Juliane I suppose at some point I will be like the woman I work with. I just won't remember it being another way. Atm however how, when and what happened are very fresh in my memory. It just hurts in a way I never expected.
    Now that you are coming off of Mirtazapine. Do you think the 7.5 helped you cope a little better?
    Tryn2BHopeful
    I think it helped me sleep better in the beginning. I am not sure if the idea of having some sort of control or the actual medication made it seem like I was able to cope better. The first few weeks I was a wreck. I was mad, upset, depressed. I still have my days but they are not as many. Generally I am just annoyed at this point.
    Tryn2BHopeful
    Generally speaking I think it got me out of a potentially horrible place. If there had been a button to just end it I might of. I now realize that was pretty premature, but I was already in a bad place from all the shit I had going on prior. T makes that all seem pretty trivial now.
    4Grace
    That's what's holding me. Mine is different. Food drink everything
    God help me if this thing gets worse... ugh... Knock, Knock, whos there, T, T who.... TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
    4Grace
    I so understand the emotions behind this post.
    Met someone at work today who has had T so long she doesn't remember not having it. I have talked to them so many times and never knew!
    Tryn2BHopeful
    @WCJohn ah yes... the walkman... I am gonna guess his was noise induced...
    4Grace
    @Tryn2BHopeful - she said it was going to take some time. I do think it's possible. I dream of a day that now seems impossible. Imagine it's there and does not bother you much. I can see it,… but not really…. I can see it …. but not really, .. I can see it, but not really,… I can see it!
    Tryn2BHopeful
    @4Grace We gotta have confidence. We are gonna get there. These beautiful pictures of our families are all the motivation we need.
    Another appointment tomorrow at a audiologist that is supposed to "specialize in tinnitus". We shall see.
    Ben Winders
    send that money to a charity instead ... or to tinnitus research. better use for the moneyz
    Tryn2BHopeful
    @Ben Winders This will likely be my last attempt. I dont like the the idea of sitting around waiting for a miracle.. but I might have to. I know that TRT and CBT wont fix my problem, but maybe they could help me atleast cope with it. World isn't stopping just because I have T so I gotta do something.
    Ben Winders
    Best of luck.
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