Out of the Blue: Almost Two Months of High-Pitched Buzz

Discussion in 'Introduce Yourself' started by tbuzz89, May 17, 2020.

    1. tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      Hello all! I've been a lurker on here for the last two months and very much appreciate all of the wonderful information many people bring to the table on this oh so lovely condition. Wanted to share my story and gather any input anyone may have. Sorry for the long-winded story beforehand!

      I first remember hearing a lower-pitched pulsing sound in my head starting back in 2008 after I had my very first bout of anxiety/panic attacks. I would only ever hear it in a silent room or at night and short of the first couple of weeks, it never bothered me much. It would come and go throughout the years and I never gave it much thought.

      Beginning January 1st of this year started the most stressful period I have ever experienced in my life. I was five months into the loss of a long term relationship, start of a brand new job, and move into a new apartment in lower Manhattan, having to leave the one I loved and shared with my ex. I admittedly had been drinking more than I should have been as I don't have a great tolerance for alcohol, however it was always drinks out with friends and never spent time drinking alone. Drinking would induce panic attacks the next day and it would take me two or three nights to be able to fall asleep again. Let's call what I'd experience a mini-withdrawals. All through the month of December I was ill with tonsillitis, and then the flu which led to a good deal of isolation. That said, by New Years Eve I was feeling better and went out, had a long night, and this time around the post-drinking anxiety did not end but rather turned into a full on emotional breakdown. I reached out for help and self-admitted for three nights into a mental care facility at a local hospital. The doctors prescribed (within all of 5 minutes) 15mg Mirtazapine and Buspar. I only took the medications for four days with the last day being January 15th, ceasing the medication with my GP's approval.

      I decided to leave New York City and spend time with my parents in Central Virginia in order to allow my mental health to recover (I had been through two similar breakdowns in the past due to alcohol consumption and my parents became a safe place for me during those previous times, however back then they still lived in my childhood home out on Long Island, NY and it was much easier to commute into Manhattan for work.) From January 1st until March 26th, I was experiencing a pretty much constant state of anxiety and restlessness along with significant insomnia. My employer agreed to put me on short-term disability, however in early March I had to make the very difficult decision to resign from my seven year career in finance as I realized it was not working out for me mentally. Also in early March, my grandfather passed away after a long battle with Alzheimer's at the age of 91. From March 12th to March 16th I attended services with my parents in upstate NY.

      Cue social distancing and stay at home orders for the COVID-19 pandemic.

      Around March 20th, I woke up with a high-pitched (16,000hz or so) ringing in my right ear. Over the next few days that tone would seem to fluctuate like an electric signal in my head, moving back and forth from left to right and then centralize to feel like it was coming from "behind" my ears. I had a minor feeling of fullness in my ears, however did not and have not experienced any perceived sensitivity to sounds. During this time I did not have any exposure to loud sounds. I have not listened to loud music since New Years, no concerts since December of 2018, and there aren't any events other than using a small electric leaf blower for less than 15 minutes sometime in March, and a vacuum every couple of weeks, that I can attribute noise exposure to. I have used earbuds over the years and spent many hours on the NYC subway and platforms (which can be quite loud,) but again, nothing since January 1st. I also haven't taken any medications since December 2019, including Advil, aspirin, or Tylenol. Only vitamins.

      My GP performed a physical on February 24th and told me that I had a little bit of fluid in my left ear, but it was nothing to be concerned over. When I visited her again in April due to the tinnitus, she said both of my ears were clear - no fluid or any wax. I also had an ENT/audiologist visit on May 7th and my ears were "perfectly clean" as the doctor said. My hearing results revealed normal hearing sensitivity, bilaterally with the exception of a mild sensorineural notch at 3kHZ in both ears. Word recognition test was perfect. The ENT's words were "with your age of 31 years and very good physical health, I'd expect that in time this will go away."

      Since the onset two months ago, the fluctuation of the sound has decreased. And now I would say that the high pitched tone is more of an electrical buzzing sound that I can still hear over pretty much everything except a shower. It seems to spike up and down at random, however as time goes on, each high spike leads to perceived quieter days for longer times, little by little. Two nights ago for the first time I heard relative silence for a few minutes. Yesterday it spiked and appeared louder than it had been since the beginning, and this morning I had an hour or so that seemed to be the quietest it's been since it started. While I do still hear/feel the buzz, it has been an overall good day in terms of volume. I am wondering if this pattern is a good sign?

      I am still living at my parent's new home in Virginia due to COVID which has put a serious pause on my life. The constant anxiety stopped all of a sudden on March 26th, however I was left with moderate depression due to all of the sudden life changes. The depression has been getting better and better as each day goes on, and I can finally say that aside from the tinnitus, I feel like I'm very close to being back to a normal state of mental strength. While I still have a little bit of difficulty sleeping at times, overall the insomnia has improved drastically as well. I desperately miss NYC, all of my friends, and full-time employment, however I realize that until Corornavirus settles down in the NY metro area, I will need to spend some more time here with my parents (stressful in itself at times, especially with not much to do.) All of this has compounded on some already serious stress, however as time goes on my emotions have been stabilizing substantially from where I was even in mid-April.

      I have not had a drop of alcohol since New Years Day and after all of these years of struggling with alcohol induced anxiety, I've decided to stop for good. I have also decided to never use EarPods again and wear hearing protection in loud environments, even if there's a possibility mine is not from acoustic trauma.

      Considering everything above, what are the chances that the tinnitus will fade in time?

      Thank you all!
       
      • Hug Hug x 4
    2. billie48
      Sunshine

      billie48 Member Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2009
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      not sure
      Welcome to the forum. I have read your story above and from your description your tinnitus may be a result of anxiety and stress. I am no doctor and so this is purely a speculation based on your description, and that your ENT cleared you of any problem in the ears. If this is the case, the best thing is to learn to relax and to calm your nerves, such as by doing some leisure exercises, walking, hiking, jogging or even meditation. Taking on a new hobby or having a pet will also rejuvenate your brain and distract you from paying attention to T or to your problems. There is no crystal ball on T but the general pattern is that overtime, with you actively engaged in living life, T gradually become less important and so the brain will focus on it less and less. This then will likely to result in reduction of the T either in intensity or your perception of it has improved over time. You also have some quiet moments which is a good sign. You should be positive that you will be just fine over time. The general consensus of recovery of habituation will be from 6 months to 18 months, but some people like me may take longer as I have had both T & hyperacusis plus PTSD to deal with. I also suffered years of panic disorder which made recovery slower than others. However today I live a normal, happy, productive and absolutely enjoyable life. So give it time and be patient. Take care. God bless.
       
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    3. Michael Leigh

      Michael Leigh Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Brighton, UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      April /1996
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced
      I am sorry to hear of the difficulties that you have been through and the way they have affected your life. Life is problematic and few of us will go through it without having problems and stresses similar to what you have described in your post. @billie48 has given you some very good advice so please give it some thought. If possible try and see a counsellor too.

      Hope you start to feel better soon.
      Take care

      Michael
       
      • Like Like x 1
    4. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      Thank you @billie48 and @Michael Leigh. I very much appreciate both of your words and input. In regards to relaxation and the calming of nerves, I am definitely over the worst of the anxiety/panic I was experiencing earlier this year. It's coming up on two months where I feel settled down and not constantly restless and on edge. I believe the biggest hurdle at this point is the lack of stimulation due to unemployment and the stay-at-home orders, along with the inability to return to New York at this moment; I'd rather not be quarantined in an apartment all by myself right now. I realize this is a global issue that so many people are facing during this pandemic, but it sure leaves a lot of time for us to focus in on our problems!

      These words definitely add a positive light, thank you! I know it's behind you now, but from a sympathetic standpoint I'm sorry you struggled with all of that and am incredibly glad to hear that you're living an enjoyable life. God bless!

      I have been seeing a CBT counselor since late January which has been an immense help. While he has no experience dealing with or treating people with T, he is compassionate towards the issue and reinforces mindful awareness and tolerance towards it.
       
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    5. Michael Leigh

      Michael Leigh Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Brighton, UK
      Tinnitus Since:
      April /1996
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise induced
      @tbuzz89

      I am pleased to hear that you have been seeing a counsellor. I have written some articles on tinnitus that included coping and management techniques, that you might find helpful in the links below.

      Take care
      Michael

      https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/tinnitus-a-personal-view.18668/
      https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/acquiring-a-positive-mindset.23969/
      https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/tinnitus-and-the-negative-mindset.23705/
      https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/the-habituation-process.20767/
      https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/is-positivity-important.23150/
       
      • Hug Hug x 2
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    6. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      The last two days have been difficult and over time my emotions range from hopeful to hopeless just as much as the volume seems to fluctuate. When I wake up in the morning and lay in bed, the tinnitus volume seems to be much lower than the night before. As soon as I get out of bed and start to move, the tinnitus increases in volume during the day. Some days seem to be quieter than others, and at times it feels like some moments during a given day are quieter/louder than others.

      I know in tinnitus terms it's still early, but two months of this electrical buzz is eating at me. There are times I feel like I won't be able to live a normal life again.

      Thanks for listening.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
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    7. OnceUponaTime
      Busy

      OnceUponaTime Member Podcast Patron Benefactor Hall of Fame Advocate

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      11/11
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise
      So sorry you are struggling right now with tinnitus. Please do know that there are some things that you can do to help you cope with it. It is always very stressful at the beginning. Just know that the anxiety makes it worst. You do need to get that under control. This site is a wealth of information, but please do not be scared with some of the things you will read here. Just remember that every person is different with different body chemistry and what may work for one may not work for another. There are many kinds of tinnitus and causes.

      Tinnitus is unpredictable. At least for me. And it is like a roller coaster, some days better, others not so.
      I really hope yours improve.
      Wishing you quiet days.
      :huganimation:

      Once
       
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    8. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      • Hug Hug x 2
    9. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      Hey all – today marks my three month tinniversary and before going on, I just want to thank everyone who contributes to this forum and provides support to all community members as we make our way through each day of this hell.

      I’ve hit the fabled three month mark and while 90 days ago I was hoping and praying that the tinnitus would have gone away by this point, that’s just not the case. There’s no question that it’s a bit different than what it was at onset, maybe a little bit more stable sounding, but still a buzz in my head that drives me absolutely crazy. I seem to have more fluctuation between absolute hell level and relative quiet, and those fluctuations have increased from happening maybe once a week to almost happening on a daily basis, which I’m hoping is a good sign. I still haven’t achieved “can only hear it in a quiet room,” as even on it’s lowest days I can still hear the buzz above every noise other than a shower. Some days/moments it’s a lot more reactive than others, as well.

      I think the most difficult part of this journey is that I’m still struggling mentally. I don’t think I’ve been able to accept what has happened and I still look back to search for a cause no matter how unsuccessful I am at pinpointing anything. I don't know if it's noise induced or not as I had been living a VERY quiet life for the three months leading up to the onset. There are many moments throughout each day where I feel like I’m never going to be able to move forward, never be able to hold down a job like I once had, never be able to have a fulfilling social life again, etc. I’ve struggled with anxiety and depression for a long time and just prior to the start of this tinnitus was the most intense bout I’ve ever had in my life. Just as I felt like I was starting to come out of a dark period, this devil struck and dealing with it has been nothing less than the most difficult battle of my 31 years.

      I guess I’m just looking for some reassurance that things will improve as today’s milestone has been a tough pill to swallow.
       
      • Hug Hug x 7
    10. Emgee

      Emgee Member Podcast Patron Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Modern Society = Too Loud
      Hey, @tbuzz89. I’m also just over my three-month mark. I am greatly struggling as well. My tinnitus is highly reactive and keeps me confined to my home. Mine has gotten worse since onset, unfortunately.

      I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. Please reach out anytime if you need to talk. The thing that keeps me going is the fact that there have been people who experienced improvements months/years down the line. It’s importantly to realize that there is no one timetable that tinnitus follows. Moreover, future treatments look promising. Regenerative medicine has helped me stay at least somewhat positive at times. I believe tinnitus and hearing loss will be significantly improved for many just a few years from now. I know it’s hard to digest when we want to live and be present now, but there is hope. I hope you start to feel better soon. All the best.
       
      • Hug Hug x 2
    11. ASilverLight
      In pain

      ASilverLight Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      That's the question.
      Hey @tbuzz89

      I'm about 3 months ahead of you, still struggling, but also coping a bit better. I really resonate with what you write -
      this especially. I'm only 23, I've dealt with depression and anxiety since I was 10, perhaps even younger, and life was finally starting to turn around for me then - tinnitus. Like you I struggle to pinpoint the exact cause. Loads of things happened around the onset and I strongly suspect it has multiple factors, finally leading to tinnitus. This includes a neck trauma, lots of fluid behind the ear, an earwax blockage, 3-day long panic attack, and a very minor noise trauma (around 90-95dB, 2 seconds. Not a single symptom or discomfort after this until more than a week later). I've taken care of my hearing all my life and never had a fleeting tinnitus tone before, and ironically, as a music lover, getting tinnitus has always been one of my worst fears in life.
      Most people here consider these fluctuations to be a good sign, though I personally don't see how/why. Then again, I am inclined to think that, if my tinnitus can get so quiet I barely notice it, surely it should be able to STAY there eventually. My tinnitus has been fluctuating, sometimes minute by minute, for about 4-5 months now, but as of late I think I'm noticing more and more quiet moments. I don't really know what causes my tinnitus to fluctuate so heavily throughout the day - it's not noise, but I don't know what else it could be.

      There are now times I cannot hear my tinnitus even with very low background noise around me, and there are moments when I can hear it scream over the TV.

      All I can really say is that you're not alone, and that many of us are here for you to talk to. It's a really sucky, cruel thing, and it should've had a decent treatment by now. Hopefully we'll get one soon.
       
      • Hug Hug x 2
    12. Vassili
      Wishful

      Vassili Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      10/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise-induced
      Hey, @tbuzz89

      Hold on. I think 3 months is too early to be pessimistic. I've reached my "hear it only in quiet rooms phase" after 7 months. And things continue to improve. I hope that I will recover after two years. I don't know why I gave myself 2 years time starting from day one but it helps me psychologically. Right now I'm also planning to find a good neurologist because all sorts of pain related to my hyperacusis is still present but in a much more tolerable and mild form but it still messes me up a bit. May be there is a way. I am not a doctor but a consultation would do me good, I think.

      I wish you full recovery and lots of patience.
       
      • Hug Hug x 2
    13. LilSass
      Pensive

      LilSass Member

      Location:
      Ontario, Canada
      Tinnitus Since:
      November 2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Likely ototoxic medication
      Hey @tbuzz89!
      I wish I could offer you more assurance. It does seem that for many with noise induced t (you stated you have minor hearing loss) it fades, albeit slowly. It is extremely difficult to be patient with this condition, but it does seem like your situation is improving. I sincerely hope that this continues and I know that you will get through this. Stay strong my friend!❤
       
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    14. Luman
      Spaced

      Luman Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Brooklyn
      Tinnitus Since:
      07/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Intermittent Tinnitus probably noise induced
      That was a very well written piece, and I understand what you're going through. It's been three years since my tinnitus began, and I'm amazed every single day how much easier it is, than I thought it would ever be. The mind learns how to shift it's attention away from the noises, for the overwhelming majority of those with tinnitus, over time. The end result, is that your thoughts no longer dwell on tinnitus, and you can get your life back on track, with certain precautions in place for safety. And remember, you're still in a very early stage of tinnitus, so there's an excellent chance that it will fade to silence, or very close to that state.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
    15. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      @ASilverLight, have you tried any sort of physiotherapy, upper cervical work, etc.?
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
    16. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      @Luman - tried starting a convo with you but apparently it's restricted. Wanted to ask where you are in Brooklyn? I lived in Park Slope for two year and Carroll Gardens for a year.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
    17. afm

      afm Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      05/2015
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown

      All this that happens to you, happens to me too, exactly the same. Until now I had not found anyone who had the same symptoms. The cause of my tinnitus was different (it was not due to hearing loss) but stress and anxiety intervened.
       
      • Hug Hug x 2
    18. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      @Emgee

      I'm so sorry that you're struggling with this as well, especially being confined to staying home AND having it get worse. I hope that over the next few months it starts to fade for you.
       
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    19. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      @Vassili that's great news! I know you still deal with pain from hyperacusis but it must be a relief to not be able to hear the tinnitus over everyday ambient sounds. I think your idea of seeking out a neurologist is smart, even if it just helps with peace of mind. I wish you luck with that and I hope that you recover completely within the coming months!

      My tinnitus is definitely reactive, and while I don't experience pain from sounds, my understanding is that reactivity can imply mild hyperacusis. I find the most difficulty around a group of people or sounds from speakers - makes an already intrusive tinnitus scream.
       
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    20. ASilverLight
      In pain

      ASilverLight Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      That's the question.
      I've had some physical therapy. Unfortunately, due to the way insurance works in my country, I've only had 10 sessions with a PT - of which 4 or 5 were video calls because of COVID-19. It did help some, and I'm still doing my exercises. Unfortunately I think I'm going to need more done because my neck is still stiff, sore etc and my posture is also horrible.
       
    21. Vassili
      Wishful

      Vassili Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      10/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise-induced
      Yes, it is a relief, a major one. At least you can continue with your life and not to concentrate on it much. When I'm at home I remember about my tinnitus and hyperacusis when, for example, teakettle starts to work or my laptop starts cooling process. Also, when I'm sitting in one room and TV is on in the other, then I hear something like birds singing in the distance or firecrackers in the distance and it's usually accompanied by burning sensation or mild pain in the ears or head. I've also noticed that I can listen to music, but not Rock/Metal. Usually ma ears react to speaking voice but with music it's usually OK if it's not loud. It's a good thing that I can sit in total silence now. Then I hear a very quiet tinnitus, so quiet that it does not bother me at all. Maybe I'll try not to mask while sleeping anymore. Also when I'm outside I don't hear my tinnitus, well may be sometimes when my ears are plugged, and it is very quiet and it can appear for couple of seconds/minutes and then it disappears again. Yesterday I stood in traffic behind two loud motorcycles and after them I heard my tinnitus being in the car for a couple of minutes then it disappeared again. So yes, the phase "hear it only in quiet rooms" makes life much easier. Sometimes I even start to forget about my tinnitus but my pain reminds me about it.

      Thank you for kind words. I hope I will be lucky to recover. Time will tell. I mean if things continue to improve I don't see why they can't go on to improve further even though sometimes it is really hard to feel that improvement because it is really tricky with constant setbacks. :dunno:
       
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    22. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      It seems like you've seen some major improvement since your onset, which is great news! I also see no reason why it won't continue to get better considering the progress you've already made. Very happy to hear that!

      I've taken on a policy of overprotecting, at least for now. My opinion is that wearing hearing protection in most environments for six months or so shouldn't cause any long-term sensitivity issues and may (hopefully) help the tinnitus fade by avoiding as many setbacks as possible.
       
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    23. Vassili
      Wishful

      Vassili Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      10/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise-induced
      I plug my ears with professional musicians earplugs when I'm driving because sometimes, well most of the time it is really loud in the traffic. We have so many motorcycles in the city during the Summer, it't insane. When I'm walking outside or going to a mall I use my old headphones but without any music. It, on one hand, protects my ears, but on the other lets them to deal with certain amount of everyday noise, prevents them to forget how to deal with noise. And when I'm at home I don't protect at all. I can't wear earplugs all the time because my ears get tired of them and start to hurt inside. I want to try and stop masking while I sleep, may be it also helps with something. I've noticed that when I go to sleep the sound level increases in the beginning, but then it becomes softer and goes down.

      I think you can try to overprotect for couple of months but constantly monitor how your ears feel. I think finding a balance is the best way.
       
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    24. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      I've lived in New York City for many years now so I completely understand what it's like to live in a loud city. Never gave it much thought until tinnitus started in March when I had been out of New York for almost three months living in a quiet rural area. Eventually I am going back to New York City since it's my true home but I'll never walk around without some form of hearing protection there again.

      I've only recently started wearing hearing protection when at home and only when I'm in the kitchen and taking a shower (I wear muffs, not plugs, to reduce the occulation effect.) At this point it's doing whatever possible to promote healing.

      I try and spend time each day at a local park which is fairly isolated and very quiet, so I don't wear any hearing protection while I'm there. In the time that I'm there, I still hear the tinnitus but it appears much softer than it is when I'm home. Maybe that's the stress related component.
       
      • Hug Hug x 2
    25. Vassili
      Wishful

      Vassili Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      10/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise-induced
      I am sure you will get better with time. And someday we will write our success stories, that's for sure. I have no doubt. :rockingbanana:
       
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    26. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      tbuzz89

      tbuzz89 Member

      Location:
      New York
      Tinnitus Since:
      03/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Good question. Maybe anxiety, headphones, and or a virus.
      Thanks @Vassili, gives me a little bit of hope hearing words like that. Of course, I’m sure you will as well considering the progress you’ve already made.
       
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