Should I Tell My Parents About My Noise-Induced Tinnitus (I'm an Adult)?

Discussion in 'Support' started by Poseidon65, Nov 23, 2020.

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Have you told your parents about your tinnitus?

  1. Yes, and I'm glad I did

  2. Yes, and I regret I did

  3. No, but I'm thinking of doing so

  4. No, and I never will

  5. My parents have passed away

  6. Other (describe in comments)

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    1. Poseidon65

      Poseidon65 Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      1/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      A loud live music show
      Hi folks,

      I am 39 years old, and have noise-induced tinnitus from attending a loud concert 10 months ago. I would describe my tinnitus as mild at sometimes, but moderate at other times. When it's moderate, I think about it all throughout the day.

      Right now, the only person who knows about my tinnitus (other than my doctor) is my wife.

      A question I'm struggling with is whether to tell my parents.

      Reasons not to tell them are:

      (1) it's possible for me to hide it (as I've done thus far),

      (2) I don't want them worrying about me all the time, especially given that tinnitus can't be cured, and

      (3) I'm a bit embarrassed about the whole experience of getting tinnitus, given that it was entirely preventable.

      However, I'm now considering pursuing therapy which might involve the use of in-ear maskers. If I do this, it will be harder to hide. For example, I would have to be careful to not post pictures of myself with the maskers in, and would I have to remember to take them out when FaceTime'ing with my parents (or with others who know them, e.g. my in-laws).

      A question to this group. If you are an adult who cares for yourself, did you tell your parents about your noise-induced tinnitus? Why or why not? If you did, how did it go? Are you glad you told them?
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    2. MBH

      MBH Member

      Location:
      Upstate NY
      Tinnitus Since:
      06/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Overloaded stress
      I did not tell my mother. She is 85. Even if I did tell her, she would not understand. She would not have understood years ago either. I would not tell them. For the reason, not to worry them. Also, my tinnitus is from major stress.
       
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    3. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Poseidon65

      Poseidon65 Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      1/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      A loud live music show
      Note if folks are willing to share the reason for their answer (e.g. if they're glad they told their parents, why that is), I'd really appreciate it.
       
    4. GBB

      GBB Member Hall of Fame

      Location:
      NYC
      Tinnitus Since:
      2016-2019 (Mild, Cured) 8/2020 (Severe)
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Virus / Microsuction / Acoustic Trauma
      This reads as a bit neurotic honestly. My tinnitus is bad and I have a migraine so maybe I’m being harsh - just tell them...
       
    5. Lilah
      Mellow

      Lilah Member Benefactor

      Location:
      USA
      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2018
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I didn't tell my parents right away as I was confused and in denial, however I told them a few weeks later as my sleep worsened and the sound worsened (it started more like a tone and then became multi-sound, loud, changing, etc.). It would not have been possible to hide.
       
    6. wwtsai
      Assassinator

      wwtsai Member Podcast Patron Benefactor

      Location:
      San Francisco
      Tinnitus Since:
      Mild (2016) Bothersome (8/20)
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      SNHL
      I was hesitant on telling my mom cuz she tends to freak out about these things. I eventually did and she's been helping me cope with it (while still freaking out sometimes). Turns out she has tinnitus too... and apparently a couple of my relatives too.
       
    7. AUTHOR
      AUTHOR
      Poseidon65

      Poseidon65 Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      1/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      A loud live music show
      An update here: I decided I will tell my parents, because I am visiting them soon and I want to wear my hearing aids during the visit. However, I will not tell them the absolute full extent of how tinnitus affects me. This is because I simply don't want them to feel sad about what happened, or to be worrying about me all of the time. I don't think any good comes from that.

      I did tell my sister the full extent however, and I'm glad I did. It felt good to get it off my chest, so to speak.
       
      • Like Like x 1
      • Hug Hug x 1
    8. Steph1710
      Old hag

      Steph1710 Member Podcast Patron Benefactor Ambassador Hall of Fame

      Location:
      England
      Tinnitus Since:
      08/04/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Antibiotics - I think
      Your mom sounds so sweet. :)
       
    9. Wrfortiscue
      Probing

      Wrfortiscue Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      1999
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Trauma
      I told my family and found out my brother and mother have tinnitus.
       
    10. Luman
      Spaced

      Luman Member Benefactor

      Location:
      Brooklyn
      Tinnitus Since:
      07/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Intermittent Tinnitus probably noise induced
      Tell them, since this is an extremely common condition. Most people with tinnitus never even mention it, because they have habituated. Tell them that it's annoying, but it gets better after time and becomes a non-issue.
       
    11. TrevorSanders

      TrevorSanders Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      09/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise Exposure/Ototoxic Medication
      It is wild how many people have tinnitus. I found out 2 of my uncles and my grandpa have it.
       
      • Like Like x 1
      • Agree Agree x 1
    12. Rudedog205

      Rudedog205 Member

      Location:
      Wisconsin
      Tinnitus Since:
      05/2021
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise exposure? Possible concussion? Covid Vaccine? TMJ?
      I told my family and found out my dad had it quite severely and basically every aunt and uncle also had it along with my grandpa and great grandpa on that side of the family had it to some degree. It turns out I was very destined to get it at some point.
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    13. XoutofstepX

      XoutofstepX Member

      Location:
      Denver, CO
      Tinnitus Since:
      2013
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Trauma from loud concerts.
      I’m 36 and I’ve had very mild tinnitus for years and up until about 2 months ago it all of a sudden ramped up to where I can hear it 24/7. Mine is from years of punk and hardcore shows with zero ear protection.

      I recently told my parents and they asked me why I never told them about this. Well, it’s because it wasn’t really affecting my life in any measurable way other than I slept with a box fan. Now that the tinnitus has crept into my daily life it did feel good to let them know.

      Funny thing is I told my mom while I was in the Urgent Care ER for a high heart rate, chest pains and heart palpitations. Turns out I was probably just having a panic attack. Crazy shit! Never had one before! I need to talk to my parents more anyway...

      Take care!
       
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