Suicidal

Discussion in 'Support' started by jeremy06, Oct 14, 2018.

    1. Pitseleh

      Pitseleh Member

      Location:
      France
      Tinnitus Since:
      2007
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      The thing is tricky with benzos and it's not only about using them cautiously.

      I respect them, but I've been using them for 3 years strictly respecting the dosage and I had to up my dose a lot recently as my tinnitus is getting so much more severe.

      Problem is I'm not even at a comfortable dose now and it's losing its effect on me.

      Yet, if I weren't on benzos already, I would get it prescribed ASAP if every other option didn't help me lower the tinnitus.

      This is what I called the price to pay.
      You don't know when or if you will reach tolerance, but trust me, when you do, you are a in a worse place than where you began.
       
    2. Tweedleman
      Depressed

      Tweedleman Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      2001
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown/Noise
      I had about a 6 month supply and when I ran out I didn't bother calling the doc for more until a month later. I actually like them better for blunting social anxiety than tinnitus.
       
    3. Tweedleman
      Depressed

      Tweedleman Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      2001
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown/Noise
      I haven't encountered any of that yet, but I'll take your word for it. They've been utterly consistent from the beginning, very subtle. My tinnitus was only ever moderate at worst. If yours is severe I can see why you're hitting tolerance, the amount I take barely makes a dent in my low tinnitus.
       
    4. Michael01
      Frustrated

      Michael01 Member

      Location:
      Grafton,NSW,Australia.
      Tinnitus Since:
      2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I don't know how much longer I can be like this either. All I know is that recently, all sound seems to becoming hostile to me, and I don't see any point in going on like this, if things continue like this, as all the things I used to like doing are being taken away from me.

      Even worse my GP doesn't seem to understand my position as he's resisting giving me a referral. I'd like to get things more thoroughly checked out.
       
      • Hug Hug x 3
    5. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      Such a vague assertion means nothing to me.

      Do they have mild tinnitus? What's their age? Mild and under 30? Okay, I accept your theory then. :rolleyes:
       
    6. Bill Bauer
      No Mood

      Bill Bauer Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      February, 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Trauma
      Both mild and bad cases of tinnitus and all ages. Having said that, this is based on people's posts on this forum. So it is impossible to get a sense of the fraction of the people who end up having this experience, except that the probability of that happening isn't negligible.
       
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    7. jay777

      jay777 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      10/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      benzo/ headphones
      What about in the 1% club?
       
    8. Bill Bauer
      No Mood

      Bill Bauer Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      February, 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Trauma
      What are you talking about?
       
    9. Johan001

      Johan001 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      05/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Medication
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    10. Chinmoku

      Chinmoku Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      10/2018
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown, possibly medication
      So sad to read news like this. Even the tinnitus community might not have been able to help him, who knows? I tried so many things, NHS, private, alternative medicine, devices, supplements, osteopathy, medications, mindfulness... nothing seems to work. We are the unlucky cases but what can we do?
       
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    11. Chinmoku

      Chinmoku Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      10/2018
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown, possibly medication
      Probably he is referring to a percentage of people who suffer with debilitating tinnitus and cannot habituate? I have always in mind this ballpark figure of 1% of population being troubled by their tinnitus, so I imagine not being able to habituate, but don't have any hard data. I would have habituated if mine had not kept worsening so long.
       
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    12. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      I agree. I think most of these "habituation proponents " have mild or maybe moderate tinnitus. I think a 1% figure might be accurate for severe tinnitus sufferers to habituate but I don't see any evidence of it here. I suggest that probability or chance of habituation is directly related to degree of severity.

      I rarely see anyone make a detailed assertion either or one with context. Bill didn't totally clear it up for me. I think older people will have more acoustic traumas over time, more exposure to noise and age doesn't actually help the condition of our ears. But, of course, there are exceptions and I guess, young people are increasingly exposing their ears to noise, using potential ototoxic drugs etc. I also haven't seen any data to support many of the claims and assertions here either and I doubt there are any.
       
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    13. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      Someone should collect these stories and when they have a large number of them, mass send them to doctors, ENTs and researchers.

      I read the story but I think the pub night was just the "final straw," the trigger. Do firemen wear ear plugs? I suspect many of them don't. Those sirens are loud. I don't know if many of them get tinnitus but I wonder if the siren harms the ears of some of the workers. Then another noise finally causes the tinnitus?

      I don't think people can be helped until there is a real treatment that the researchers come up with.

      Seeing doctors doesn't help or do anything. It's pretty devastating when you discover that.
       
      • Agree Agree x 2
    14. Bill Bauer
      No Mood

      Bill Bauer Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      February, 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Trauma
      Have you been protecting your ears from all of the noise that feels too loud to you?
       
    15. GBB

      GBB Member

      Location:
      NYC
      Tinnitus Since:
      2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Microsuction / Additional Acoustic Trauma in Close Proximity
      Today is pretty tough again - spike after lasering. Took a Xanax and am trying to just chill out but the noise is quite piercing now... I don’t know why I do this to myself - just want some more improvement :p
       
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    16. Chinmoku

      Chinmoku Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      10/2018
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown, possibly medication
      I have tried my best but with two kids it's hard. Maybe I was exposed to noise. After lockdown things have been very quiet though.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
    17. TheBikeRinger

      TheBikeRinger Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      My tinnitus started 03/30/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      I had a fall and my spine injury cause me to have tinnitus
       
    18. TheBikeRinger

      TheBikeRinger Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      My tinnitus started 03/30/2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      I had a fall and my spine injury cause me to have tinnitus
      It is a hard and challenging thing we have to go through with this tinnitus .I'll kindly ask you please do not give in to those thoughts. You're lovely wife and son needs you . Mr Jeremy
       
    19. Kriszti

      Kriszti Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      2016/2017/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Venting, I'm sorry.

      Nights are so very hard. The low hum returned, that's hellish and it's been present longer than ever. I'm starting to think that it's staying. It perfectly masks the bilateral high pitched tinnitus in my left ear, but in my right things got crazy. Developed a new windblow sound which comes and goes, and the normal high pitched sound went haywire. It's sharper, shriller, louder, more metallic.

      What's good to one of my sounds, sets off the others, it's a can't win situation. Last time I had the low hum, I didn't have the high frequency sounds yet and now sometimes feels like my head is about to explode.

      In my country, COVID-19 is raging after a pretty mild but economically devastating first wave and I'm extremely worried about my family. I only care about myself as far as tinnitus goes, just don't make it worse, but I'm worried sick for my family.

      My 1 year anniversary of tinnitus is coming up soon and although I saw small improvements that I'm grateful for, overall I still can't cope and still feel that tinnitus ruined my life.
       
      • Hug Hug x 2
    20. Bill Arsenault

      Bill Arsenault Member

      Location:
      Boston.
      Tinnitus Since:
      Permanent and intrusive since 2017.
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Medication / Noise Over Exposure
      Oh man.
      This is pure Gold.

      I will be waiting patiently today for someone to make a completely harmless observation around me and then I will pounce.

      “DON’T... BE GIVING ME...
      NONE OF YOUR...
      VAGUE... MUTHERFUKIN...
      ASSERTIONS!!!!”.

      “THAT SHIT... DON'T MEAN...
      A GODDAMN
      THING TO ME!!!”

      “AND IF IT HAPPENS AGAIN...
      THERE WILL BE NO WARNINGS...
      SO MIND YOUR NECKS!!!”

      Anyway-
      Willing to bet that Bill B. was not expecting some psychopath to request a fucking spread sheet when he made his simple observation.

      Which by the way - is highly accurate.

      So I will spell it out for you moron.

      Most people who experience habituation to any degree for the first time-
      Almost invariably report on Tinnitus Talk as having it begin to happen right around the 2 1/2 year mark or so.

      If you want deeper stats- dig them up yourself.

      If this observation does not apply to you -
      Then move the fuck along.
      Don’t shoot the messenger you piece of shit.

      Sweet Jesus-
      How do you log into a tinnitus forum and not expect to see vague assertions and speculation.

      And then in pretty much the same breath that this knuckle head is calling out extremely helpful members of a tinnitus forum for making vague assertions -
      He goes on to say that:

      “proponents of habituation must not have severe tinnitus.”

      That’s a little vague there creep.

      But whatever -
      We all know your weak ass game now -
      Manipulation and Contradictions whenever any one says anything you don’t want to hear or that opposes your views.

      I would love nothing more than 5 minutes alone with you.

      Anyway -
      I already once wasted 15 minutes of my life that I will never get back listening to this fool arguing that no one's depression could ever be as debilitating for them as his tinnitus is for him.

      Yet he has the ability to spew endless pages of nonsense while some one with severe depression has been curled up in a ball in bed for 3 weeks unable to summon enough motivation to even eat or shower themselves.

      I will not miss my breakfast before work arguing with this maggot.

      Have a good day all.
       
      • Winner Winner x 1
    21. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      I'll guess (from your rant) that you're around 19 y.o. and it contributes to your useless, pointless post. Have a nice day, Mr. Chuckles.
       
    22. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      How bad is their tinnitus though?

      I don't think it's severe. It doesn't make sense. I don't have to read posts from people to know mild tinnitus isn't as bad and people can habituate to it. Moderate tinnitus might be tolerable for some.

      I don't care what the religious "habituation" zealots say. They have a screw loose. Imho, there's a lot of people who have psychological issues here and imho, their credibility is suspect so I don't believe everyone's claims blindly.
       
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    23. DaveFromChicago

      DaveFromChicago Member Podcast Patron Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Headcold/Flu
      PeteJ is entirely correct. I am now reaching 6 years and 10 months of this, and my capacity to habituate is crumbling. Especially since after all this time I have stopped anticipating that it will ever go completely away. Also, the latest utterly discouraging news from Dr. Shore about their trials not being finished until the end of 2021 (which is only the latest in a series of once promising but eventually such disappointing "treatments" that I have learned of ever since I got this).

      I still wake up at 2AM with a high pitched air hose blasting in my left ear.
      Yesterday afternoon I contracted a monstrously debilitating stomach flu, which frantically led me to analyze all of my myriad symptoms for assurance that I did not have COVID-19.

      Add to this my increasing migraines (this always happens during the transition from summer to fall).

      Although, it occurred to me that I could cope with all of these other conditions because they were either temporary or treatable; tinnitus has a relentless, unchangeable constancy.

      Tinnitus is like one of those horrific Greek Myths (Tantalus, Sisyphus, etc.) that pins you down with your agony and naked, eternal helplessness.
       
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    24. Bill Bauer
      No Mood

      Bill Bauer Member Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      February, 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Acoustic Trauma
      A number of people had posted here saying that they can still hear their tinnitus over the sound of a car on a highway (or in the moving subway car) [this seems to mean that their tinnitus is pretty loud], and that they felt better about 2-3 years after the onset...
       
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    25. GBB

      GBB Member

      Location:
      NYC
      Tinnitus Since:
      2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Microsuction / Additional Acoustic Trauma in Close Proximity
      I agree with you on the Greek myth thing - it seems designed to drive us mad. I can only keep looking ahead to the future and treatments that I hope will come.
       
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    26. GBB

      GBB Member

      Location:
      NYC
      Tinnitus Since:
      2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Microsuction / Additional Acoustic Trauma in Close Proximity
      I just walked to the front desk of the hotel I’m staying at to microwave a sandwich and now my ears are screaming like I just left a heavy metal concert. Wtf is this life...

      Treatments/Therapies are literally my only hope.
       
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    27. kamil1364

      kamil1364 Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Possibly noise-induced
      Recently I have read story here about someone who had his tinnitus significantly worsened by noisy scissors used by hairdresser. Someone recommended him to go there and check those scissors with decibel meter (with his earplugs in).

      You can habituate for sure, but how to live with it further while being careful about it not getting worse? (I am talking noise induced here). Stuff like I described above is so terrifying. You need to be careful about moderate (not to mention loud) sounds, and it's hard to exist in silence too. You can't live in environment with constant 50 decibel sound if you are willing to lead normal life (unless normal life for you means sitting at your house with white noise machine 24/7).
       
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    28. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      But, scissors noise????

      Many noises are routine even if loud?

      What if you live in a loud area? How do you deal with that if you can't move?

      I am wondering if I am allowed to create a new thread? I want people who assert that they have SEVERE, LOUD, HIGH PITCHED tinnitus to reply and ask to be counted?

      10/10 loudness volume or worse.

      I am just curious about numbers. I assume that many of those are suicidal too or seriously think about suicide. That tinnitus is the main reason, specifically loud tinnitus. Being tortured by aggressive, multiple high pitched tones.

      I think it might be interesting to get an idea of the numbers (#s; % of sufferers here). What do you think?

      I also believe that habituation is the most difficult and unlikely for this severity of tinnitus.

      I also wonder if people with tinnitus this loud and severe had a gradual worsening, maybe many spikes, temporary but also permanent spikes that eventually led to the severe/loud tinnitus tones they have today and whether certain events or noise exposures led to that. In other words, whether there were definite/clear events or if you can only guess on what happened?

      Thoughts? I consider this in that category and it's this severity and loud volume that makes me want to commit suicide eventually. There's no cure or hope so just going day by day is pointless suffering. I don't believe the assurances of people who say some research treatment is "coming." I don't know what their tinnitus is like (few saying that ever describe in detail, their own) or why they're so optimistic and sure but I don't see any evidence on here. Just unsubstantiated assurances and optimism.
       
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    29. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      My tinnitus finally fluctuated for once. The volume significantly reduced temporarily but the reason was very interesting and odd.

      I was at a Walmart and pulling out a grocery cart. They're always really stuck and while pulling one out, it caused a really loud, high pitched screeching sound! I was really mad and worried. But, while in the store, I couldn't hear my tinnitus. It's loud in there and my cart made noise but I can usually hear my tinnitus in grocery stores. It's usually that loud.

      But, I couldn't hear it. It was great. When I finished shopping and left the store, I could hear faint tinnitus tones. Gradually but then suddenly, the loudness was back but it was quieter for about 5 minutes or a bit longer. An hour later, it's loud again. :-(

      Is this something to do with neuromodulation or something?

      I think it's interesting and wonder if this is what researchers are trying to figure out. If the inner ear could be repaired and your ears are exposed to the 'right' frequency/sound, could you somehow lower the tinnitus sounds/tones and hopefully keep it that way if the inner ear was repaired too?

      What kind of "repair" would do it? Nerves? Hair cells? The improvement was short and it had to have been the loud noise but it has to be a certain frequency or certain sound. It can’t just be any sound or noise.

      But, the horrible tinnitus returned.
       
      • Optimistic Optimistic x 1
    30. GBB

      GBB Member

      Location:
      NYC
      Tinnitus Since:
      2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Microsuction / Additional Acoustic Trauma in Close Proximity
      I have no scientific basis for believing the underlying mechanism is true, but I believe there is one success story on here where the author "reclaimed" the frequency of his tinnitus by playing similar notes on his piano and trying to stimulate his brain. Maybe it works on a similar principle.
       
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