Suicidal

Discussion in 'Support' started by jeremy06, Oct 14, 2018.

    1. Pulsing Ear
      Frustrated

      Pulsing Ear Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Is there something that happened to you that you think caused it to get worse? Was it a slow thing over a matter of weeks, or did it come on real sudden?

      I hope it goes away for you soon. My problems have gotten a lot better.
       
    2. Snake
      Heartbroken

      Snake Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2011
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Long term playing computer games on headphones.
      I'm losing it, noone will help us. Don't be a fool
       
      • Hug Hug x 3
    3. Pulsing Ear
      Frustrated

      Pulsing Ear Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      What is going on with your hearing? I know how you feel because I've felt that too. It is no fun feeling hopeless. My myoclonus came back a little bit last night and I started feeling hopeless. Luckily my heart at least kept beating right. I always try to look on the bright side.
       
    4. Snake
      Heartbroken

      Snake Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2011
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Long term playing computer games on headphones.
      Two acoustic traumas this year, first from dentist drill, next I went through a door's glass (a long story). My tinnitus is 2-3x worse than before and has stayed that way for months. I want to die, why should I live anymore?
       
      • Hug Hug x 3
    5. Pulsing Ear
      Frustrated

      Pulsing Ear Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      It should lessen and get back to how it was, or at least go down some. If you're like me, you'll eventually tune that stuff out and mostly forget about it. We have some members here that feel the same way as you. Maybe reach out to them.

      My main problem is my heart failure, but I've got a big list of health problems now including stapedial myoclonus and tinnitus. Ive faced death several times and decided I want nothing to do with it.
       
      • Hug Hug x 1
      • Optimistic Optimistic x 1
    6. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      How loud is it? What is it like?

      Many people on here seem to describe theirs as a beeping or morse code like.

      I don't have that. Mine has always been a ringing sound. Several high pitched tones. Spikes from sounds and the dentist drill. But, sometimes it seems random. The fear is I can't avoid what spikes it or I am accidentally in a situation that spikes it.

      IF normal everyday sounds spike it, then what good is this life, right?
       
    7. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      We produce our own melatonin.

      The issue I have with medication is that it never treats the tinnitus which is causing the depression and distress in the first place.

      If someone has depression usually, it's considered a neurological phenomenon or due to some brain chemistry. But, if a veteran loses his legs and limbs, isn't it natural to feel depressed? If the tinnitus is so bad, so intrusive or loud, how are antidepressants going to help?

      That is the problem with tinnitus which is discussed in the research section of this forum, isn't it? There's no direct treatment in existence right now that improves or lowers volume of tinnitus. There's no "cure" or treatment that directly affects it in a positive way or any way?

      Just medicating ourselves is *something* but in reality, it might only help a small percentage of people?

      In my opinion or my perception, its effectiveness is in direct correlation to (perceived?) severity of one's tinnitus. I don't mean to be harsh but does that make any sense to anyone? Because, it does to me. :-(
       
      • Agree Agree x 3
    8. kingsfan
      Mellow

      kingsfan Member

      Location:
      Southern California
      Tinnitus Since:
      mild for years. severe on 09/17/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      turning everything up to 11
      But is depression still mechanically the same whether it's caused by tinnitus or by a divorce or loss, etc?
       
    9. Pulsing Ear
      Frustrated

      Pulsing Ear Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      We haven't lost any of the members in this thread to suicide have we? It scares me to read how some on here describe how they might actually be considering it. Do the members on here have a phone number or way to contact others for help? When I was in college I was good friends with a girl that had tried suicide several times but was unsuccessful. She later volunteered for a suicide hotline where people could call for help. It would be really nice if there was one for people suffering from tinnitus and thinking about suicide.
       
      • Friendly Friendly x 3
      • Hug Hug x 1
    10. __nico__
      Heartbroken

      __nico__ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2019 / worse Nov 2020 / H since Dec 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown/Noise
      • Hug Hug x 2
    11. Kriszti

      Kriszti Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      2016/2017/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      We lost Allan around a year ago. As an anonymous forum, some might know each other offline too, but other than that there is no way to know whether people disappearing from the forum are just taking a break, move on, or actually went through with suicide. I don't know whether it would be beneficial for members if we actually knew when someone killed themself, which is the sad reality when someone just had enough of this senseless, meaningless, everlasting torture.

      Maybe just the insomnia talking but I don't know what a suicide hotline could say to chronic sufferers.
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    12. Snake
      Heartbroken

      Snake Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      08/2011
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Long term playing computer games on headphones.
      We lost several people on Tinnitus Talk, that we know of and that we don't. We're going to lose more people in the future as long as there's no treatment.
      High pitched hissing + something like ringing + something like I don't know what it is synthesizer? Several sounds all around my head + ears, they are loud on the level where I can feel physical pain + head burning. I don't know how long I will survive anymore, I lost my life and everything that was around me. I lost my urge to survive, lost someone that was everything to me (she lied to me that my condition is not a problem, also now after some events she's happy that she made my tinnitus bad like that xD and that she destroyed my life because second trauma was her fault. The second trauma sealed the deal.)
       
      • Hug Hug x 3
    13. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      Mental Health professionals might argue serotonin levels are too low and SSRIs are one treatment that might address that. But, if there is a physical connection or link to the depression or causing the depression then medication either won't work or will be a temporary help because the main problem is not being addressed. At least, I think this is the case for most people or when tinnitus (volume) is severe.
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    14. DaveFromChicago

      DaveFromChicago Member Podcast Patron Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2014
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Headcold/Flu
      PeteJ is entirely correct. With a total absence of any real remedy, the only recourse a psychiatrist has is to zonk you with enough drugs so that you are stupefied into not caring about the condition. Most crises that trigger intense anxiety or depression (abusive treatment on a job, divorce, loneliness, etc.) can at least be partially remedied by external change. Tinnitus resembles a granitic boulder in the consciousness that cannot be budged; such drugs only temporarily induce a counterfeit habituation.
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
    15. Pulsing Ear
      Frustrated

      Pulsing Ear Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      I'm glad my tinnitus isn't loud enough to ruin my life. I can totally understand how it feels though. My myoclonus was really bad a few weeks ago. That and the tinnitus combined was horrible. Then my heart got stuck in ventricular tachycardia and I had to get defibrillated. So many problems all going on at the same time. I have trouble with esosinophilic esophagitis too, and one night I couldn't swallow anything. Had to throw up. Life can always get worse.

      If the tinnitus gets bad enough, has anyone ever had the auditory nerve severed? That would stop it all but you'd be permanently deaf. Hard to imagine wanting to do it or finding a surgeon willing to do the surgery.
       
    16. ajc

      ajc Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      11/2002; spike 2009; worse 2017-18
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loud music - noise damage
      You are wrong. There are studies showing that tinnitus remains in about 50% of cases where the auditory nerve is severed.

      Hence tinnitus is a brain condition.
       
      • Agree Agree x 2
      • Helpful Helpful x 1
    17. Pulsing Ear
      Frustrated

      Pulsing Ear Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Really? That makes no sense to me. If that's the case, then in some people the problem lies in the temporal lobe of the brain itself and has little to do with the ear apparatus.

      Do you have any links for us to read? I'd really like to see that. Contradicts what I thought.

      That also means there have been a good number of doctors willing to do the surgery. Maybe some of the cases involved severing of the nerve because of some other unrelated reason?
       
    18. ajc

      ajc Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      11/2002; spike 2009; worse 2017-18
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loud music - noise damage
      Link:
      https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/6915835/

      After surgical removal of acoustic tumours with excision of the auditory nerve in 414 patients, only 40% reported improvement in their tinnitus. Of 68 patients undergoing translabyrinthine eighth nerve section, 60 (80%) had tinnitus preoperatively. Improvement occurred in 45%, while 55% reported the condition to be the same or worse.
       
      • Helpful Helpful x 1
    19. Pulsing Ear
      Frustrated

      Pulsing Ear Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Thanks! The article says that the cochlear implant seems to be the way to go. I'd also think that almost all cases of the 8th cranial nerve being severed resulted from surgery for things like tumors. So a majority of patients had no improvement.

      I wonder if scientists have any idea how this works. It's as if something in the ear stimulates changes in the brain that are somewhat permanent.

      I wonder if there are any cases of people born deaf having tinnitus!? That would be most unfortunate.
       
    20. Contrast
      No Mood

      Contrast Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Clown World
      Tinnitus Since:
      late 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      noise injury
      I was thinking the forum could get together and do something fun like publish a parody Academic paper that makes all the stereotypical ignorant assumptions that Jastreboff, Hashir, and Leigh promote.

      Topics can include that the tonal audiogram being perfect, sociology studies being the holy grail that need more funding, TRT curing hyperacusis, MRI's to detect hearing damage, any unknown disorder is psychosomatic, anti depressants solving everything, and behavioral therapist discussing their new spin-off of CBT.

      I swear to God, The only thing that makes me not suicidal is the comedy value of all of this.
       
      • Funny Funny x 4
    21. Zugzug

      Zugzug Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Tinnitus Since:
      05/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Leigh could be a co-author. His contributions would be copy pasting posts from the forum. Sorry, Leigh, no hard feelings :) I am kidding.
       
      • Like Like x 1
    22. Kriszti

      Kriszti Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      2016/2017/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      Science actually has lots of ideas about how tinnitus is connected to the brain. In the Research News section there are academic papers collected, and members discussing possible future treatment options. Tinnitus Hub has a Tinnitus Talk Podcast and on its YouTube channel there are interviews with researchers ranging from Jastreboff to Susan Shore.
       
      • Helpful Helpful x 1
    23. PeteJ
      Depressed

      PeteJ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      02/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      acoustic trauma?
      I believe I read on here people talking about tinnitus involving hearing loss and higher frequencies. Also, a relationship between the brain and hearing (actually, involving the brain and the ear 'apparatus' as you might call it?). If the inner ear is damaged and nerve cells & the cochlea etc. isn't functioning as it should, I think the idea is the brain 'panics' and 'retries' to process the sound. It continues to fail repeatedly and this is shown in the form of tinnitus? Some experts described it as a system that won't turn off?

      This layman's explanation isn't good but I think both the brain and ears (inner ear) is involved.

      You can often recognize a relationship on here between hearing loss and tinnitus, whether it's hidden hearing loss or the one measured on an audiogram, there is inner ear damage and the brain trying to deal with it.

      I would speculate that severing the auditory nerve won't help because the brain is still trying to 'locate' sound, maybe the higher frequencies, that still aren't there (obviously).

      Someone who is born deaf won't have tinnitus because their brain never processed sound so it never 'learned' to 'expect' sound and never 'lost it' to begin with?

      Not a good explanation by any means but I wonder if researchers would think any of that is close to being 'right?'
       
      • Agree Agree x 2
    24. Contrast
      No Mood

      Contrast Member Benefactor Hall of Fame

      Location:
      Clown World
      Tinnitus Since:
      late 2017
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      noise injury
      You don't have to apologize. Apologizing is for cucks. For example, The alter loves to say offensive things about religious and spiritual people. He doesn't care who he offends.
       
    25. Pulsing Ear
      Frustrated

      Pulsing Ear Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      12/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown
      There seems to be some neural communication both afferent and efferent between the brain and the organs in the ear. I think this explains why people like me also suffer from myoclonus in the middle ear muscles.
       
    26. Sevv

      Sevv Member Benefactor

      Tinnitus Since:
      12.04.2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Loud concert
      I'm thinking more of nasty satirical strips.

      Panel 1: Patient to the doctor: "Doctor, I went to a loud concert and now my ears are ringing. It's really depressing me!"
      Panel 2: Doctor: "No problem! Let's just quick do this really loud MRI test to rule out other factors."
      Panel 3: Shows the patient in panic, holding his hands over his ears that now ring like crazy and holding the expensive bill of the doctor in his hands.

      Another one:

      Row 1: Title "How doctors should counsel tinnitus patients"
      Panel 1: Patient to the doctor: "Doctor, I have really loud ringing in my ears. It's driving me crazy. I can't sleep, I can't think of anything else."
      Panel 2: Doctor: "Don't worry. Statistics show that in most cases it goes down or even goes away completely. If it doesn't, there's still a very good chance you get so used to it that it feels normal and you'll have your life back, even if the first months are going to be tough. And if all doesn't help, research has come a long way!
      Panel 3: Patient: "Thank you doctor! That really helped me to calm down. I'm much more optimistic now!"

      Row 2: Title "The reality"
      Panel 1: Patient to the doctor: "Doctor, I have really loud ringing in my ears. It's driving me crazy. I can't sleep, I can't think of anything else."
      Panel 2: Doctor: "Just learn to live with it. I can't help you. Here's your bill."
      Panel 3: Patient commits suicide.

      Man my own satire is nastier and tougher to swallow than anything I've read before.
       
      • Like Like x 3
    27. FGG
      No Mood

      FGG Member Podcast Patron Benefactor Hall of Fame Advocate

      Tinnitus Since:
      01/2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Multi-factorial
      This is a pretty good basic explanation of it.

      I would add to think of it like Phantom Limb (tinnitus is "phantom cochlea"), @Pulsing Ear. If you were born without limbs your brain wouldn't be used to having them.

      People have had their whole cochleas removed (i.e. from cancer) still have tinnitus. You can't fix phantom limb syndrome with more amputation, either.

      On the other hand, when there are treatable causes of auditory interferences, the tinnitus subsides. And I suspect when the optogenetic (versus crude electric based ones which only hit frequencies at intervals) cochlear implants come out, they would be even better for tinnitus. Regenerative drugs will probably beat those to market, though as those are about 5 years out.
       
      • Agree Agree x 2
    28. TrevorSanders

      TrevorSanders Member

      Location:
      Ohio
      Tinnitus Since:
      09/2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise Exposure/Ototoxic Medication
      Sums up my experience so far. Suicide tbd.
       
    29. Bartoli

      Bartoli Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2009,worsened 2019
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Noise
      Can you ELI5 how the optogenetic CIs work? Would they work in tandem with the residual hearing?
       
    30. __nico__
      Heartbroken

      __nico__ Member

      Tinnitus Since:
      2019 / worse Nov 2020 / H since Dec 2020
      Cause of Tinnitus:
      Unknown/Noise
      Every day forward I just want to kill myself more.
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
      • Hug Hug x 1

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